No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle Walkthrough v1.06
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No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle Walkthrough

by sophialeigh   Updated to v1.06 on
                                         /
                                        /
                                       /
     No More Heroes 2                 / 
------------------------------------ /  "I've taken the shackles of revenge,
          Desperate Struggle        /------------------------------------------
                                   /        and I'm throwing them back on you."
                                  /
                                 /
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Game Specs
----------------------------------------
 Platform: Wii
Developer: Grasshopper Manufacture, Ubisoft (2010)
    Genre: Sword Fighter, Action
   Rating: M (Blood and Gore, Intense Violence,
           Partial Nudity, Sexual Themes, Strong
           Language, put the kids to bed already)


                                       //Walkthrough Specs
                                       ----------------------------------------
                                                  Author: Georgi Samaras
                                                  E-mail: SophiaLee04@yahoo.com
                                                 Version: 1.06
                                            Last Updated: March 22, 2010


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Contents
----------------------------------------
    Introduction........................... [int]
    Controls .............................. [con]
    The HUD and Menu ...................... [hud]
    Santa Destroy ......................... [san]
    Battle Mechanics ...................... [bat]
    Beam Katanas .......................... [bek]
    Ecstasy and the Darkside .............. [slo]
    Tips and Tricks ....................... [tip]
    Walkthrough
      Revenge for Helter Skelter .......... [rhs]
      Rank 50: The Hip-Hop Priest ......... [r50]
      Rank 25: Cheerleaders are Evil ...... [r25]
      The Fangirl ......................... [fng]
      Rank 24: The Pyro in the Akashic .... [r24]
      Rank 23: The Poison Witch ........... [r23]
      Rank 10: Twofold Revenge ............ [r10]
      Rank 09: The Money Grubber .......... [r09]
      Rank 08: Here We Go Again ........... [r08]
      Rank 07: Cheap Dragon ............... [r07]
      Sir Henry's Nightmare ............... [hnm]
      Rank 04: The Goddess of Death ....... [r04]
      Rank 03: The Lost Spaceman .......... [r03]
      Rank 02: An Assassin Named... ....... [r02]
      Rank 01: Revenge .................... [r01]
    Exercising Jeane ...................... [eje]
    Bizarre Jelly 5 ....................... [bj5]
    Side Jobs ............................. [sjb]
    Revenge Missions ...................... [rvg]
    New Game + and Deathmatch ............. [ngp]
    Miscellaneous ......................... [mis]


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Introduction                     [int]
----------------------------------------
    Back in my guide for the first No More Heroes, in answering a question
    about a possible sequel, I wrote something along the lines of

    "Sylvia already told us that that's not likely."

    Well, my old guide can shove it because here we are playing No More
    Heroes 2 and dammit, it feels GREAT.  For those of you who've played the
    first, take heart in the fact that this game honors its predecessor's
    spirit with flying colors.

    For those of you joining Travis for the first time, where have you been?
    Better late than never.  Now get in here and let's slice some heads.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Controls                         [con]
----------------------------------------
    The game box spoils it already, so I don't feel bad coming out and saying
    that you get to control other people besides Travis.  Henry and Shinobu, to
    be precise.  The controls for them are similar to Travis' with the
    exception of the B button and their lack of things like Darkside Mode.  The
    game will clue you in on their specific controls when the time comes.

    I've heard the classic controller is awful to use compared to a Wii-mote,
    but someone sent in the controls, so I've added them to this section.  I
    don't have one, so all controls referenced in this guide are going to be
    for the Wii-mote.

    Nunchuk
    -------
      control stick: move your player character
           C button: center camera behind you
           Z button: hold to lock on to an enemy and block attacks
                     nitro (on the Schpeltiger)
      shake nunchuk: Step-In Slice (must be earned)

    Wii-mote
    --------
       directional pad: emergency evade
              A button: slash
                        charged slash (hold A)
                        long range attack for Shinobu and Henry (hold A)
                        accelerate (on the Schpeltiger)
              B button: melee attack
                        initiate a wrestling move (when enemy is dizzy, this
                          works for both Travis and Shinobu)
                        pick up an enemy that has been knocked down
                        jump (Shinobu)
                        dash (Henry)
                        brake (on the Schpeltiger)
      minus (-) button: activate Darkside Mode
       plus (+) button: open menu/pause game
                        skip cutscenes (press twice)
              1 button: enter charge mode
              2 button: switch beam katanas (use the control stick to toggle
                          between weapons)
                        toggle between targets (when locked on)
        shake Wii-mote: get up after being knocked down
                        charge your beam katana (after pressing 1)
                        perform a running slash
                        jump (on the Schpeltiger)

    *in battle, you will also be prompted to wave the Wii-mote and nunchuk
     according to on-screen arrows

    *on the loading screen, hit B repeatedly to spin the loading star

    Classic Controller
    ------------------
       left control stick: move, weapon clash, death blow
      right control stick: emergency evade, weapon clash, death blow
                        Y: high slash (hold to charge)
                        X: low slash (hold to charge)
                        B: punch, wrestling move
                        A: kick, wrestling move
                    Y + B: running slash
                    X + A: Step-In Slice (must be earned)
                        L: target
                        R: recharge katana (move left control stick)
                       ZL: reset camera
                   select: same as Wii remote

    *mash buttons to recover


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//The HUD and Menu                 [hud]
----------------------------------------
    This section goes over what all that pixelated stuff is on your heads-up-
    display, as well as what is in the menu.

    Battle HUD
    ----------
      • Your health gauge is the heart in the upper left.
      • The Darkside Mode meter is the tiger in the lower right.
      • The cartoonish penis with a smiley face in the upper right is your
        katana's energy meter.
      • The mini-map, which shows paths, items of interest, and enemy positions
        is in the lower left.
      • The slots appear in the bottom middle of the screen after a death blow
        or wrestling move.
      • When targeting an enemy, you will see their life gauge displayed as a
        reticule around them.  When not targeting them, their life gauges
        appear as colored bars above their heads.

    Menu Options
    ------------
      In the Status menu:
        • current UAA rank
        • how much health you have
        • your beam katana's charge
        • how full your ecstasy gauge is
        • the name of the weapon you are currently wielding
        • the level of your stamina and muscle

      In the Data menu:
        • percentage of clothes you've bought
        • how many gifts you have collected
        • how far you've progressed in the revenge missions
        • your high scores for each side job

      In the Config menu:
        • all the obligatory game customization options that you should be
          familiar with already


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Santa Destroy                    [san]
----------------------------------------
    Those of you that hated the pseudo-sandbox Santa Destroy can finally quit
    your whining: they removed it.  You now navigate the city via a menu and
    simply select where you want to go.  This section will go over the
    locations in blue: the different businesses in Santa Destroy that should be
    relevant to your interests.

    You can also get to your ranking fights, side jobs, and revenge missions
    from the map menu, but they all have their own sections in this
    walkthrough.

    Motel
    -----
      Motel "No More Heroes" is still Travis' base of operations even though he
      owns a mansion now.  In here we've got:
      • the bedroom closet, where you store all the clothes you've bought at
        Airport 51.
      • Jeane, who has turned into a colossal fatass since the last game.
      • the shelf in the living room, where you can read wrestling magazines to
        learn new moves (these are restocked as you progress in the game).
      • the TV, where you can watch videos and play Bizarre Jelly 5.
      • the toilet, the best save point to come out of recent gaming history.

    Airport 51
    ----------
      Santa Destroy's newest one-stop clothing shop, built after the old
      AREA 51 was totaled.  If you're looking to fill Travis' closet, this is
      the place to go.  New clothes are added to the store as you progress in
      the game.
      There has been mention of a bug in the game that makes some of the
      clothing you buy here disappear but fixes itself once everything is
      purchased.  I haven't seen it myself, so I can't weigh in on this.
      Judging from notes that have been sent in, the glitch is pretty
      unpredictable.  Try saving and reloading or just buying everything up in
      the hopes it fixes itself.

    Naomi's Lab
    -----------
      Naomi the sexy scientist is here showing off the game's new breast
      physics.  She also sells beam katanas.  She doesn't seem to sell
      accessories anymore, just two different swords.  On the surface, there is
      not much difference between her katanas besides their designs.  Play
      around with them a little and you will notice the differences.  A rundown
      of each katana is available elsewhere in the walkthrough.

    Ryan's Gym
    ----------
      Ryan is here showing off the breast physics as well.  (Cannot unsee.)  Go
      train in his gym to raise Travis' strength and max health.

      Strength exercises require you spar with Ryan by using A to punch, B to
      kick, and the control stick to duck under his lustful advances.  The game
      consists of him throwing weights at you and you needing to hit them back.
      Generally you want to hit the weights right before they hit Travis; don't
      punch or kick too early thinking his arms and legs are long enough to hit
      the weights.  Every now and then, Ryan will throw a spinning weight that
      will either go high or low; these can be tricky, so don't jump the gun.
      Duck under his kisses and that's all there is to it.  Things will get
      faster as the games progress, and the last level is insane.  You can get
      hit by about three or four weights and still pass.

      Stamina exercises consist of running on a treadmill.  You must tap B and
      Z alternately to keep Travis running.  You must also keep the control
      stick tilted in the opposite direction the treadmill is going.  Look at
      the arrows on the bottom of the treadmill; they indicate its direction.
      I used to think this game was hard, but now I realize this is only
      because it's a pain in the fingers.  I don't recommend doing this after
      you've been playing for a while.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Battle Mechanics                 [bat]
----------------------------------------
    No More Heroes 2 actually did very little to change the combat mechanics
    from the first game.  So that means it's "copypasta from the first guide"
    time!

    Slashes
    -------
      To slash with your katana, simply press A.  Slashes can be both high and
      low; slash high when enemies guard low and slash low when they guard
      high.  Press the A button repeatedly to start a slash combo, and hold A
      down to do a charged attack.  Charged slashes are unblockable, but you
      are extremely vulnerable and lose your charge when you take damage.
      Charges also use up a lot of battery power the higher the charge.

    Beat Attacks and Wrestling Moves
    --------------------------------
      To stun an enemy and break their guard, press B to melee them.  Beat
      attacks can be both high and low; beat high when enemies are guarding
      high and vice versa.  When stunned, enemies will be dizzied, as indicated
      by them seeing stars, Looney Tunes style.  Press B when near them to grab
      them and perform a wrestling move, which will have you flick both the
      Wii-mote and nunchuk according to on-screen arrows.  Wrestling moves will
      be insta-kills on all non-boss enemies.

    Weapon Clash
    ------------
      When your attack meets that of an enemy, you will lock swords.  The
      remote will appear on the screen in a circle.  Rapidly turn circles with
      your remote to deflect their attack and execute a death blow.  If you
      don't, your enemy gets a free shot at you.

    Lock On and Guard
    -----------------
      Press the Z button to lock on to an enemy.  Pressing the 2 button will
      change which enemy you lock onto.  When locked on, Travis will only focus
      on that one enemy and will run circles around him/her as well.  Locking
      on also lets Travis deflect enemy attacks if he's not swinging his
      katana.

    Charge Mode
    -----------
      Since the beam katana runs on batteries, the power will eventually run
      out and they will have to recharge.  Attacking enemies, using it to open
      chests, and blocking attacks all use some of the katana's power.  When
      your charge meter in the upper right of the HUD is red and outlined in
      white, you are fully charged.  When it goes completely limp and your
      remote starts beeping, you need to charge.

      Press the 1 button to enter charge mode.  The game would have you wave
      the remote from side to side to recharge, but it's much more fun to mimic
      Travis and pump the remote up and down.  Travis is very vulnerable to
      attack during charge mode.

    Death Blows
    -----------
      Depleting an enemy's health with basic slashes allows you to execute a
      death blow.  This simply requires you swing the Wii-mote in the direction
      of the arrow on the screen.  As the name suggests, they are always lethal
      on lesser foes and take large chunks of fatter enemies and bosses' health
      meters.  You can forego a death blow if you want; this is useful for
      when you want to get in more hits, like in Darkside Mode.  (Thanks to
      Andrew for this tip.)

    Dodging
    -------
      Press any of the four directional buttons on the d-pad to dodge.  Travis
      is invulnerable during a dodge.  He also no longer needs to be locked on
      to an enemy in order to dodge.

    While in an area where you will have to fight, you'll see chests, items,
    and icons appear on the field.  Things you will find in chests include

    Pizza
    -----
      Your lone source of nourishment: slices restore small portions of health,
      while whole pizzas get you up to 100%.  Enemies will also drop pizza.

    Batteries
    ---------
      Recharge your beam katana quickly with these guys.  Batteries that look
      like AAs will give you a small amount of charge.  The ones that look like
      9-volts completely get it up.  The charge, I mean.  Enemies drop these,
      too.

    Magazines
    ---------
      These fill your ecstasy gauge to the max.

    Gifts
    -----
      Nicely wrapped presents for Travis can be picked up in the heat of
      battle.  These add decorative touches to his living space.

    Exclamation Points
    ------------------
      These mark your destination.  To activate them, you must meet a certain
      requirement, usually killing all enemies in the immediate area.

    S
    -
      These mark save points (i.e. - toilets).


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Beam Katanas                     [bek]
----------------------------------------
    Travis' weapon of choice is a beam katana and has been ever since he won
    his first in an internet auction.  This section will list the katanas he
    can add to his weapons cache, as well as what makes them unique.  Each
    katana has small quirks, and all of them get a special power boost when the
    ecstasy gauge is red (doesn't have to be full).

    To switch between any of these katanas, press the 2 button while not locked
    on, hold it, and use the control stick to cycle between all the katanas on
    Travis' belt.  You are 100% immune to attack during the "switch beam
    katanas" animation, which is drawn out enough to make it a nice way to
    cheat some enemies out of a hit.  But that's cheap.

    Blood Berry
    -----------
      The original flavor and the most balanced katana.  Not too powerful but
      perfect for beginners.  No real bells and whistles.  Short battery life,
      too.  When your ecstasy gauge is red and you can chain longer combos,
      you will find that the Blood Berry's combo will knock enemies away from
      you and to the ground.

    Camellia MK-III
    ---------------
      This katana is available at Naomi's lab for LB$50,000 from the start of
      the game.  It is actually the Tsubaki Mk-III she made for Travis in the
      last game, and it handles the same.  It just isn't as kickass as it once
      was.  It seems to be slightly faster than the Blood Berry but not
      noticeably more powerful.  Like the first Tsubaki model, this one seems
      to render enemies dizzy more often without having to use beat attacks, so
      use this if you like to wrestle.  Ecstasy-powered combos with Camellia
      MK-III make enemies airborne and land them on the ground.

    Peony
    -----
      This katana is yours for a whopping LB$300,000 after you beat the 25th
      ranking match.  A true light saber, this beam sword is the strongest
      katana you can swing, but it is s o  s l o w, even in ecstasy Darkside
      Mode.  Use with caution around quick enemies and be careful of your
      combos.  Take only one or two swings at a time unless you are sure of
      your safety.  The battery is pretty durable.  The Peony's ecstasy combo
      is long and drawn out, but it is very handy against the bigger enemies.
      The Peony's blade also gets freakishly long when the ecstasy gauge is
      red.  (Insert over-compensation joke here.)

    Rose Nasty
    ----------
      This is the dual-wielding set you've been waiting for.  Shinobu will
      leave this in your motel room after she tells you her story.  Not as
      powerful as the other katanas, but it has a wide damage radius and is
      pretty fast.  It has some of the more impressive combo strings that get
      even better when the tiger turns red.  I've been able to consistently
      kill normal enemies at full health using just one of Rose Nasty's
      combos.  Battery life is equally impressive; normal slash combos barely
      drain it, and only excessive blocking or charge attacks seem to put a
      real dent in the battery.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Ecstasy and the Darkside         [slo]
----------------------------------------
    New to the game is the ecstasy gauge: the tiger in the lower right.  As
    Travis lands hits on foes, the gauge goes up.  When the tiger is red and
    outlined in white, a special Darkside Mode is ready.  Hitting the minus
    button gives Travis an automatic recharge for his katana, a super speed
    boost and the ability to slash enemies to ribbons.  Just keep hitting A and
    all will end well.  For you, at least.  The fun ends when the tiger stops
    breathing fire.  You can trigger this Darkside Mode during boss fights.

    Another way to enter Darkside Mode is the slots.  Slots spin when you do a
    death blow or finish off an enemy with a wrestling move.  Line up three
    icons to enter one of four Darkside modes.  The slots will not appear
    during boss fights.

    Strawberry on the Shortcake
    ---------------------------
      Three cherries give Travis a small speed boost while making it look as
      though regular enemies are moving extra slowly.  Think of it as a tame
      version of the ecstasy special described above.

    Blueberry Cheese Brownie
    ------------------------
      Line up three bells and Travis gains the ability to shoot fire directly
      in front of him.  Unfortunately, it's not homing or spread fire.  Try to
      get enemies in your line of sight and press A.  You don't need to be
      close to them to damage them.

    Cranberry Chocolate Sundae
    --------------------------
      The old cranberry chocolate sundae was my favorite Darkside Mode.
      At least they replaced it with something equally as badass.  Line up
      three bars and Travis turns into a GODDAMN TIGER.  One press of the A or
      B buttons is enough to kill anything in this form, and if you hold B and
      knock someone to the ground, you can give them an even more brutal
      mauling.  All enemies will run away from you in terror, so all you need
      to do is lock on and track them down.

    Gooseberry Sugar Donut
    ----------------------
      A lucky 777 gives Travis the power to send out a shockwave, obliterating
      everyone in the current area.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Tips and Tricks                  [tip]
----------------------------------------
    Back in my first guide, this section was only made possible thanks to
    contributions from nice people that thought to send me stuff.  I was
    pleasantly surprised to see some of it retain its usefulness in the sequel.
    I'm going to add as much as I can to this new version.

    Surprise Slide
    --------------
      That's what I called it, but the better and less lame-sounding name for
      it is "dark stepping."  What this move is is a quick dodge that puts you
      behind an enemy, leaving them open for tons of free damage.  To perform
      it, let the enemy enter a slash combo.  Now run into it while guarding.
      During their combo, continuously double tab or simply press and hold left
      or right on the c-stick.  If you're successful, you'll hear a sound as
      the screen turns dark, and Travis will slide along the ground to get in
      striking position.  Now mash A.  This works well against some enemies and
      even bosses, but doesn't seem to be as important to master as it was in
      the last game.

    Charged Death Blow
    ------------------
      Charged death blows are extra powerful and have a wider damage radius,
      resulting in awesome splash damage.  To perform one, shake the Wii-mote
      when performing a death blow.  White rectangles will appear around your
      sword and target, indicating the extra power.  Extremely useful when you
      have enemies near each other: you can kill nearby enemies at full health
      with a charged death blow.  When the ecstasy gauge is red, all death
      blows are automatically charged.  You cannot charge a death blow that
      takes place after a weapons clash.

    Pro-Wrestling Power
    -------------------
      Travis' real strength lies in his wrestling moves.  These will instantly
      kill all normal enemies and do a good number on some bosses, so get in
      the habit of slipping the B button in your A combo.  You can also combo
      solely with B if you want.  This is a nice option if the battery on your
      katana is out and you cannot recharge.

    Change It Up
    ------------
      You are not limited to one katana per fight anymore.  Change mid-fight if
      you need to.  Got a quick enemy running rings around you and your Peony?
      Change to the Blood Berry.  Not making a dent on that fatty with Camellia
      MK-III?  Get the Peony back out.  Want to look like a total badass?  Rose
      Nasty, baby.  You can also change katanas if the one you are using is low
      on charge and you cannot recharge.  Depleted weapons will slowly regain
      their charge over time if you switch them out.  (Thanks for Andrew for
      this last tip.)

    The Map: Use It
    ---------------
      The walkthrough is going to be referring to the map a lot, and you should
      too, if only because it tells you everything you need to know.  The most
      important things here are chests (orange squares), normal enemies (blue
      squares), and the guys with guns (blue dots).  There's a reason the map
      makes a point to tell you who has a gun and who doesn't: gunfire blows.

    Kick 'Em While They're Down
    ---------------------------
      When an enemy is on the ground, you can do several things.  One is press
      the B button when standing over them to kick them.  This causes them to
      spit out money, so that's a plus.  Travis will also sometimes pick them
      up and stand them up, leaving them dizzied and open for a wrestling move.
      If their health is low enough and you hit A over them, Travis will simply
      stab downward and kill them.

    Destructible Items
    ------------------
      You can destroy more than people in this game; you can also damage
      property!  The benefit to tearing up the environment?  Item drops.  You
      might just find some pizza in a box or an ecstasy magazine in a table,
      and you might just need it.

    Endless Combos
    --------------
      Okay, not "endless" in the common sense, but it sounds better than
      "really long combos".  You can change your stance in the middle of a
      combo, from low to high or vice versa.  This basically "resets" Travis'
      animation.  If he was in the middle of a low combo and you switch to
      high, his next move will be the first slash animation of a high combo.
      As long as you don't button mash A so hard that Travis ends his combo or
      if he is not interrupted by enemies, you can chain more hits, all by
      tilting your remote back and forth.

    Parry
    -----
      To parry an attack, hit Z immediately before it hits Travis.  This will
      enable you to block the attack and throw the enemy off guard and make
      them lose balance.  This works on all normally blocked attacks, and it
      even works on charge attacks.      

    Parry Attack
    ------------
      A trick left over from the first game.  Perform a parry and then hit A
      immediately afterwards and you will perform a move that usually results
      in an instant kill or knocks an enemy to the ground, depending on their
      remaining health.  For Travis, this is an automatic charged low slash,
      almost guaranteed to hit not only your target but all surrounding enemies
      if they're close enough.  For Shinobu, this is an automatic Hikogen (her
      long range attack).  This will work on all attacks you can parry,
      including gunfire.

    Second Chances
    --------------
      When your health reaches 0%, you might notice that Travis (or Shinobu or
      whoever) stumbles around a bit before finally calling it quits and
      kissing the floor.  This is because they're giving you a chance to get
      your ass in gear and try again.  Before they hit the dirt, shake your
      remotes and they will eventually snap out of it, coming back to the fight
      with a little bit more health.  You can only do this up to five times per
      match; after that, your luck runs out.

    Windmill Recover
    ----------------
      This was in the first game as well, but it's not as hard to recreate this
      time around, so I don't know if it qualifies as a trick anymore.
      Whenever Travis is knocked to the ground and you mash buttons or wave the
      Wii-mote to make him get back up, he will spin his legs around and
      quickly get back on his feet via slick breakdancing moves.  The boon to
      this is that if there are any enemies around you when he starts to spin,
      they will be knocked back by the time Travis is back up.  This way, you
      are guaranteed not to be crowded after he recovers.

    Rolling Recover
    ---------------
      Usually when a strong attack knocks Travis back, he lands face-up or
      -down and has to use the above trick to get up.  Whenever the ecstasy
      gauge is red, however, Travis will automatically recover from such a fall
      himself by rolling to his feet.  I've tried to recreate this trick
      without the ecstasy gauge with no such luck, so it may be an ecstasy-only
      move.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Walkthrough
----------------------------------------
    All the above stuff is good to know to fight.  Fightin' is all Travis is
    about, so I think it's time to start the action now.  More stuff like side
    jobs and missions will be available later, so refer to the info that comes
    after the walkthrough for that should you need it.

    All strategies herein were written playing Mild mode, but I've gone back
    through while playing Bitter and made notes on how each boss changes, if
    at all.  These notes also apply to Deathmatch mode, which is unlocked
    after beating the game.


    Revenge for Helter Skelter         [rhs]
    ----------------------------------------
Helter Skelter was Travis' first kill, essentially the one who got the first
game rolling.  This right here is his brother who's been suffering ever since
because of it.  The opening of this game is a pretty ingenious move on his
part.  It's too bad he looks like Cloud Strife from Final Fantasy 7.

    Skelter Helter
    --------------
      This is our tutorial fight, so read what the game has to say and then try
      it out on Skelter.  If you keep your distance, he won't do much, so use
      that to help get your bearings and practice.  He won't take it lying down
      and can give you a good smack though.  When the cutscene intervenes, the
      real fight will start.

      There are some good things Skelter can help you learn, not just about
      your attacks but enemy attacks as well.  One is charge attacks.  When you
      hear a sound and a red glow is around him, he's preparing a charged
      attack.  All enemies use these, and they are unblockable (for the most
      part; you can parry them but it takes good timing).  Learn to dodge them.
      Another is gunfire.  Travis can block it, but it will stop him in his
      tracks and deplete his katana's charge really quickly.

      Lock on to him with Z and stay locked on because he will show you just
      how big a pain in the ass gunfire is.  As long as Z is held down, Travis
      will block his bullets.  If you need to recharge, do NOT do it out in the
      open because that is the perfect chance for Skelter to shoot you.  There
      is a structure on the north side of the roof according to your map.  Run
      back there and charge up if need be.  There are also two chests here, one
      with a BATTERY and one with a PIZZA.  Chests like these will appear in
      all ranking fights (unless you are on Bitter mode); use your map to find
      them.

      Skelter's attacks consist of sword slashes, gunfire, a roundhouse kick
      that will knock you back, and charged sword attacks.  He will mix and
      match these in combos to try and throw you off.  If you ever knock him to
      the ground, he will do the same spinning recovery move Travis does, and
      he can damage you with it.

      Beating him is as simple as staying locked on and staying close to him, 
      since most of his attacks (except for the kick) can be dodged or blocked.
      I would get more into the habit of dodging; it'll come in handy a lot in
      the future.  A good method of attack is to lock on, run up to him, and do
      a running slash (shake the Wii-mote while running) to close the gap.
      This should stun him and leave him open for a combo or two, possibly
      ending with him on the floor.  It should be fairly easy to find a routine
      that works for you.  There are no gimmicks in this fight.  Just don't
      forget to keep an eye on your charge and health.

      Another thing this guy teaches you: you get to personally give the
      finishing blow via Wii-mote after each boss fight.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Skelter Helter is going to fire his gun a lot more often this time, and
      he combos faster too.  Combos still leave him as open as ever, so bait
      him into attacking by running up to him and dodging backwards as soon as
      he makes a move.  This will put you out of his reach and in position to
      start a combo.  Andrew also noted that "Skelter Helter seems to
      immediately counterattack if you use a running slash or Jeane's attack on
      him on Bitter/Death Match."

Afterwards, you get a series of disturbing scenes that put the rest of the game
in motion.  We're not just fighting for sex this time.

Sylvia will ask you to meet her at the Burger Suplex, but explore your motel
room a bit beforehand.  Jeane is fat, Travis' closet is pretty empty, and you
can read WEEKLY BACKDROPS 02 on the shelf in the living room to learn a new
wrestling move.  You can also sit in front of the TV and play video games, but
screw that.  Our best friend was just murdered.  To the burger joint!

You will want to hit up the side jobs and the gym before heading for your first
ranking fight though.  Maybe stop by Naomi's too.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 50: The Hip-Hop Priest        [r50]
    ----------------------------------------
The hotel lobby is swarming with enemies.  They are all pushovers considering
one running slash takes almost 3/4 of their health off.  However, do not go
slashing everyone in such a way.  Get used to battle by practicing things like
charged slashes, combos, dark stepping, and watching your map to track multiple
enemies.

You also want to finish off lots of enemies with death blows to get the slots
going.  The slots are a crap shoot but are insanely fun when you get a ringer.
If you're lucky, they will be activated once or twice before you hit the boss.

The ecstasy gauge is now active as well.  Keep an eye on the tiger in the lower
right.  When it's red, roaring, and outlined in white, press the minus button.
Don't worry about saving this power for the boss.  One hit will deplete the
ecstasy gauge enough to take away your chance to use it, and there will be
plenty of opportunities to build it up.  Besides, the gauge resets for boss
fights.

Make sure you collect the two chests in the lobby before proceeding when given
the all-clear.  One should contain an ECSTASY MAGAZINE and the other is full of
CASH.

Up the stairs in this next hallway, a guy will jump you out of nowhere and then
a helicopter will appear outside the windows and begin shooting at you.  Run to
the left (we'll come back for that chest) and dodge the fire until you reach
the large area ahead of you.  The helicopter will then back off and you are
free to go back down the hallway for the chest (should contain some PIZZA) and
to get rid of that guy with the gun.

In the big hall, the two chests to your left contain CASH and your first gift,
a GUITAR.  Advance south down the hall and enemies will begin pouring out of
the elevators.  The helicopter will return and more guys will pile out of it.
Same deal.  The number one rule here should be "kill all gun wielders first".
Gunfire is extremely disruptive to a sword fighting environment.

Clean up shop, get the last two chests (a BATTERY and UAA KILLER COLLECTION
NO.51), and ride the elevator.

The chest in this circular room holds an ECSTASY MAGAZINE.  Grab it because in
the next room are some new, bigger enemies.  These bigger guys fight with their
fists and can grab and restrain Travis.  Shake free if they do.  That seems to
be their only gimmick.

The two chests here are how you know you're at a boss fight.  Well, that and
the red exclamation point.  A full PIZZA and BATTERY charge await, as well as a
toilet so you can save.

    Nathan Copeland
    ---------------    
      Our second boss fight is also our first with a gimmick.  This does not
      bode well.  The first thing you need to make note of is the area on the
      east side of the room.  There are two folding walls forming an entrance
      to this little side room.  THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT.  Not only are your two
      health/recharge chests here, but the folding walls create cover for when
      you need to recharge and take a breather.

      As for Nathan's attacks, when he has his boom box on his shoulder and
      yells, "Blast him!" two rockets are going to launch right at you, one at
      a time.  Try to dodge under them while running towards Nathan to start a
      combo.  He will only do this when you are far away, so to neutralize this
      attack, just stay close.  Travis can block the rockets, but it takes a
      huge amount of power from the katana.

      When you do manage to get close to Nathan, his boom box will transform
      into his mechanical arms and he will start melee combos or will try to
      grab you.  I didn't have too much luck blocking these moves, so I
      recommend going with the dodging approach.  He will also prep charge
      attacks; you definitely want to dodge those.  They will jettison Travis
      back quite a bit and knock him down.

      That's about it for his attacks.  Pretty simple, and this is where the
      gimmicks come in.  When a short cutscene of Nathan dancing takes over, a
      new environmental hazard will be brought into play.  The first is a
      falling chandelier in the center of the room.  Easy to avoid.  The second
      are lasers mounted on the pillars in the room.  They will scan the room
      and try to target Travis' location.  You can block these with your katana
      but, again, keeping up the charge will be a problem.  Dodging when you
      see the telltale lines of red also helps.  The third gimmick is the
      exploding vases around the room.  You will hear a little riff and see
      Nathan dance a bit when they explode.  Just try to avoid the pottery and
      all will be well.  (Note that there are some vases in the side room, so
      he can potentially get you with them when you're taking a breather.)  The
      last gimmick is the moving floor panels.  The yellow and red strips in
      the floor will move towards the center, putting you in a position to get
      smeckled by the chandelier.  The vases are also sitting on this moving
      track, so it's more likely you'll hit one of them, but I still say the
      lasers are the most dangerous.

      Your strategy should revolve around staying in his face to combo and
      using the side room when you need a break.  Keep your charge up at all
      times.  Never let it get so low that your remote beeps.  You'll need to
      keep your guard up when you retreat to the side room.  Once there, wait
      for him to fire his two rockets before going back out.  Lock on ASAP and
      get ready to dodge under two more before you can get close to him again.

      Be careful when activating ecstasy Darkside Mode.  If Nathan does the
      "gimmick" dance, it completely cancels it out, meaning you just got the
      shaft big time.

      It is also possible to get Nathan in the side room and fight in there.
      This will ensure a gimmick-free fight for the most part, but he will
      probably not stay there long since he teleports to the main room to do
      his "gimmick" dance.  I say the side room is too important as cover to
      make it the battlefield.  I'd stick with the "fight in the main room,
      retreat to the side room" strategy.

      One last note, Nathan can be hurt by his own gimmicks.  The chandelier is
      the one I saw him fall victim to the most, so if you can try and keep him
      in the center of the room, it will knock him flat on his back.  It's even
      easier to get him with it when the floor panels start moving.

      Bitter mode tips:
      I didn't notice any real changes to Nathan's routine in Bitter mode.  He
      did seem to go from boom box to robot arms faster than usual, and he was
      a little more proficient at detonating the vases that were closest to
      Travis.

Ah, it's like the good old days again.  Assassinating is apparently like riding
a bicycle.  Once you taste blood, it all comes back to you.  Or something.
Yeah, exactly the same.

Afterwards, play with Jeane and hit the gym or go shopping.  Naomi has nothing
new.  Two new side jobs are also available: Coconut Grabber and Pizza with a
Vengeance.  Go see Sylvia and the head for the next fight.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 25: Cheerleaders are Evil     [r25]
    ----------------------------------------
Clear the area in front of the gate.  Nothing new except a big guy with an axe
right by the gate.  He's slow and swings his axe slowly (take note that he
likes to do *two* wide swings sometimes).  These axe guys will also block your
combos by holding up their weapons.  When this happens, switch your stance
(high or low).  Business as usual otherwise.

In the main courtyard, there's more of the same.  The lone chest in the area to
the right contains PIZZA and the two to the north hold CASH and UAA KILLER
COLLECTION NO.50.  Clear the area to the northeast and open the chests here for
an ECSTASY MAGAZINE and a BATTERY.

Kill the two enemies in the locker room and nab the PIZZA in the chest.  The
exercise room would be a great place to use your ecstasy gauge that should be
full by now.  Focus on the three big guys first and then the rest when the
meter runs out.

Side note: remember how I said you should always kill enemies with death blows
for a chance at the slots?  Case in point, my last kill in ecstasy mode here
landed me a 777, clearing the entire room.  Slots all the way, I'm telling you.

If you didn't have ecstasy mode available, the chest to the north holds an
ECSTASY MAGAZINE.  The one to the south has a SANDBAG.  Save and get ready for
probably the most amusing fight this game has to offer.

    Charlie MacDonald
    -----------------
      A giant robot fight against a football player and his cheerleaders.  May
      look challenging at first, but when you get the hang of the
      Glastonberry's controls and how it moves, this fight is a cake walk.

      The A button is your sword attack, B is jump, and Z is guard.  You can
      attack in mid-air as well, which is what we're going to do.  C is your
      special attack button; attack Charlie to fill your ecstasy gauge and
      press it when full.

      Santa Death Parade basically has two attacks: Death Parade Punch and
      Death Parade Beam.  Like a good anime robot, it will announce when it
      uses each attack.  The punch is a simple two-hit combo.  A couple steps
      or a jump backwards will put you out of harm's way, but keep Z held just
      in case.

      The beam is the one to watch for.  He announces it by yelling its name or
      "Eat it!" or sometimes not at all.  (Watch for its left arm to gather
      energy if this is the case.)  This can be fired in a forward blast or
      upward.  It will only fire upward if it catches you in a jump.  If you
      are caught in the beam, it may knock you down.  It takes a good while for
      the Glastonberry to get up due to its size, but at least Charlie cannot
      attack you when you're down.  Instead, he'll probably fire another beam
      as soon as you get up.  Do not let Charlie get too many hits in, or else
      his special attack meter will fill and you'll be on the receiving end.

      To defeat Charlie, you need to be on the defensive and wait for him to
      make his move.  The best time to attack is when he announces the Death
      Parade Beam.  As soon as he starts to yell it, jump forward and use
      either A or B to attack him.  You will jump clear over the beam and
      disrupt his attack.  You can get two or three slashes in as well before
      he regains composure.  Back away, rinse, repeat, use your special attack
      when it's ready.

      For Charlie's finishing blow, be sure to hold A, B, C, and Z all at once.

      Bitter mode tips:
      No real changes here except Charlie might seem more aggressive.  You can
      really only get one slash in before he counters.

We jumped pretty far up the ranks; all those cheerleaders were certified
killers.  Now we have evidence that cheerleaders are evil.

Back at the motel, play with Jeane and read WEEKLY BACKDROPS 03 and 04 on the
shelf.  Man the Meat and Tile in Style are both available side jobs now.
Naomi has the Peony for sale for a huge sum.  If you like power over speed,
it just might be the katana for you.  Hit the gym and then return to the motel
to see a fax on your machine about Kimmy Howell and the men who killed Bishop.
The Revenge Missions will now be available from the map.  There's a section
devoted to this later in the walkthrough.

This walkthrough is assuming you got this fax because no matter where you are
in the ranking fights, your next opponent will be Kimmy Howell should you read
it.  If you didn't get the fax, skip the next section and come back when you
do.


                   ----------------------------------------


    The Fangirl                        [fng]
    ----------------------------------------
Things are quiet at the university.  Our bigass robot fight destroyed the
northeast area, so now we are headed to the western part of campus.

The first chest you see on your right holds a BIZARRE JELLY FIVE POSTER.  The
next one (still on the right) has UAA KILLER COLLECTION THE CHALLENGER.  Keep
the Z button held down as you continue west and you'll notice Travis start to
block projectiles from nowhere.  Hm.  The third chest (on your left) holds some
CASH.

Be prepared for an ambush as you go past the car.  Dodge-roll forward to go
right past them.  These three enemies are pretty quick, so I recommend keeping
Z down and practicing your dark stepping.  The last three chests in this area
contain CASH, PIZZA, and a BATTERY.

    Kimmy Howell
    ------------
      Kimmy doesn't have that many attacks.  She'll do a fancy little spinning
      slash combo ending with a charge attack, a fully charged version of that
      combo, and she'll blow bubbles at you through her recorder.  These knock
      you on your ass, but they only flow in the direction she's facing when
      she blows them, so just run around her to avoid them.

      You can dark step around Kimmy, but you need to do it early in her slash
      combo or else the hard blow at the end will get you.  Your attacks don't
      interrupt her combo, so she may hurt you even while dark stepping.  She
      doesn't give you a warning when she's doing her fully charged combo
      either, so dark stepping might actually not be a good idea.  The normal
      one is usually preceded by "Show me what you're made of!"

      Kimmy is fast with her combos but slow everywhere else, so even though
      there is no real cover here, you can just run away from her and get
      distance if you need to recharge.

      To damage Kimmy, keep your distance and wait for her to finish a combo
      before going in with one of your own.  She occasionally takes time out to
      do a little giggly dance or show off for Travis.  That's usually the best
      time to slash her in the face.  She leaves herself very open at times,
      but she can also go from a prissy stance to a slash combo in seconds
      flat.  The best thing to do is not button mash A and watch for the
      telltale signs she's going to attack: this is usually when she starts to
      get angry and shake her fists and stomp her feet.

      A more specific strategy to battle Kimmy (sent in by Pavlov):
      "Using [Camellia], if you stand about 6-8 feet away and directly in front
      of her and wait for her to start her shorter combos, then dodge toward
      her as soon as she starts swinging, you'll pop up right behind her and
      do some serious damage.  It may work for her more powerful combo too but
      I opted to just get out of her way for those as I was already taking her
      health down pretty quick."

      And another (sent in by Andrew):
      "Another way to beat Kimmy is to equip the Blood Berry.  Stay out of
      range of her, let her attack and then hit her with a running slash attack
      as soon as the combo ends.  She'll stumble backwards for 2-4 seconds
      which is enough time to run in and hit her with three low slash attacks
      (emergency roll backwards immediately after #3). Run slightly out of
      range of her and repeat (may have to run out of range to recharge).  If
      done correctly, you should take no damage and be able to fill the ecstasy
      gauge."

      Try using the B button in your combo as well since you can usually dizzy
      Kimmy that way.  I was able to successfully use wrestling moves on her
      (sometimes multiple times in a row) when Travis could get a kick in.

      Despite Kimmy's speed with a weapon, I had some success using Naomi's
      Peony against her because of Kimmy's giggly breaks in combat.  However,
      that katana is so slow that she would frequently catch me mid-combo but
      mostly because I got overconfident and took more swings than I should
      have.  As her health drains, she'll start chaining up to three combos in
      a row.  Only death blows seem to phase this little girl; she's pretty
      tough.

      Bitter mode tips:
      No real differences here.

That's the second school girl Travis has let go.  The last time that happened,
it led to repercussions, but in a good way, as we have seen and will see later.

Even though Kimmy wasn't a ranking fight, you can exercise Jeane when you're
done.  Nothing new has been added to the map though, so go to the next match.
If you haven't bought the Peony from Naomi yet, now is a good time.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 24: The Pyro in the Akashic   [r24]
    ----------------------------------------
Slash the boards blocking your way and you'll hear the sounds of a chainsaw
ahead.  These chainsaw-wielding fatties are some of the toughest enemies, but
the Peony tears them a new one easily.  It will even disrupt their charge
attacks.  Sweet!  They will block your combos so just change your stance.  The
chest just past the first chainsaw guy holds a DOOR CURTAIN.  More enemies will
appear on the bridge, including more big guys and some smaller ones, but the
Peony will still work wonders here.

The next area contains tons of the big guys.  Peony, Peony, Peony!  You can
also go get the chest in the southeastern part of the map for the ECSTASY
MAGAZINE it holds.  The other two chests contain CASH.

Across the bridge, grab the PIZZA in the chest and follow the path.  There
isn't much room to maneuver in this path, but if you lock on to the guy in
front of the pack funneling towards you then your combos will actually hit the
others.  Also, if you can keep the tiger in the red, the Peony's blade will be
long enough to slice through several foes at once.

In the next area, boulders will fall on you as you cross the bridge.  Just use
your directional buttons to dodge-roll forward and the invincibility dodges
grant will see you through.  The chest off the little path to your right has an
ECSTASY MAGAZINE.

Fighting in the next area (an uphill cemetery) might be a little tough.  Try
not to get stuck by a gravestone or something else that will impede your
combos.  There's smaller enemies mixed in with the big guys.  Use up your
ecstasy gauge and finish off the rest normally.  The four chests here contain
CASH, PIZZA, a BATTERY, and UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.25-49.  Save in the
outhouse.

    Matt Helms
    ----------
      Oh good lord.  What is on his head.

      You're fighting in a run-down shack, so all the crap littered around is
      going to be a problem.  Most of it is destructible, but some of it takes
      more slashes than usual to break apart.  You can't go upstairs; you're
      restricted to the main floor.

      Matt likes to swing that axe around for a single swipe.  If Travis tries
      to block these, the force of the blow will cause him to lose balance.
      Dodge to the side to avoid these rather than rolling backwards.  Matt's
      axe is so long that dodging backwards still leaves Travis in his reach
      and may leave you stunned.

      Matt's real deal is turning his flamethrower on you.  Travis can catch
      fire and your health will drain.  You can put yourself out by rolling on
      the floor.  (Thanks to Grent for e-mailing this tip in.)  Matt will also
      throw little Molotov cocktails that sit on the floor waiting for Travis
      to walk on them.  These will not set him alight but will hurt.

      Clear the junk in front of the room to the south as soon as possible.
      If you need pizza or a recharge badly, you can't afford to mess with
      clearing it later.

      Stay close to Matt and do slash combos consisting of two or three
      swipes.  Dodge Matt's attack, and then go in for more.  Staying close
      should keep him from using the fire.  Even if he does break out the
      flamethrower, if you are close to him, it won't hurt you since you are
      past the tip of the axe.  Because you need to be ready to dodge at a
      moment's notice, I wouldn't use the Peony in this fight.  It's too slow.

      Not gonna lie, the camera is NOT your friend for this one.  So many
      times I would get caught in a corner where all I could see was Matt's
      ugly face.  If he tries to get you in a tight spot; coax him out.

      Bitter mode tips:
      This fight can be challenging even with a pizza to recharge your health,
      but now you have to do without.  The junk around the house is going to be
      even more of a hazard, especially when you are trying to dodge Matt's
      attacks.  Try and clear the area as best you can whilst fighting or when
      Matt isn't attacking.  Try and stay as close to Matt as possible to keep
      him from throwing fire.  If you can get him to repeatedly do his downward
      swipes or charge attacks, it's just a simple matter of performing a few
      slashes (not a full combo unless you stun him long enough to keep him
      from countering) and then running away backwards.  Definitely try to get
      ecstasy Darkside Mode active; it will go a long way.

Well, that was strange.

Back home, do the usual.  Help Jeane exercise, get WEEKLY BACKDROPS 05 from the
shelf, hit the gym, and try out the new side job: Getting Trashed.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 23: The Poison Witch          [r23]
    ----------------------------------------
Infiltrate prison island?  A stealth mission?  We're Travis f'ing Touchdown.
We crash our motorcycle into people's houses and murder their security while
flying through the air and shouting obscenities.  We don't do stealth!  If you
want to play by Kojima rules, you should notice that your radar has now gone
Metal Gear Solid on you, showing you the guards' lines of sight.  Avoid them
and the searchlights and try to work your way to the entrance undetected.  Use
your map for best results.  I honestly never made it far doing this.

For those of us that want to play No More Heroes, just go right up to the first
guard you see and Travis will get out the beam katana.  One running slash will
kill a guard outright.  Always keep Z pressed because the guards all carry
guns.  They will most likely deplete your charge but remember, you don't need a
beam katana to suplex a guy.  Use beat attacks if you can't recharge.  There
are no chests in this area; just work on murdering all security and making it
to the exclamation point on your map.  If you should happen to fill your
ecstasy gauge, don't use it.

Get the PIZZA in this new area and walk through the gate.  An alarm will ring
and all the prisoners will be set free and attack you.  You have 180 seconds to
kill everybody.  Don't worry about the chests here until everyone is dead.
You're going to get a mix of guys with bludgeons, big guys fighting with their
fists, and at least two guys with guns towards the end.  Use ecstasy mode ASAP
when you get it, and always try to aim for the slots.  My first death blow here
netted me a 777, and I've also gotten triple bars for Tiger Travis here before.
Slots are where it's at, I'm telling you!

Get the ECSTASY MAGAZINE, the BATTERY, and the SANTA DEATH PARADE from the
chests before moving on.  The chest on the landing contains UAA KILLER
COLLECTION NO.24.  There's also one underneath the stairs that contains the
GLASTONBERRY model.

You'll get several waves of enemies in this next area.  No big guys; just
normal dudes with bats, guns, and knives.  I would keep a low stance when
slashing the guys with knives since they guard high.  Wrestling moves work well
on all these enemies.  You should focus on those with guns first.

Get the last two chests that have PIZZA and a BATTERY and save.  Ew ew ew,
gross prison bathrooms.

    Cloe Walsh
    ----------
      When you see the "charge attack glow," run away because she's going to
      scream, use her creepy laser vision type attack, spew poison, or summon
      black ... things to crawl along the ground and attack you.  The first two
      have short range.  The scream hurls Travis backwards, and the laser eyes
      stun him, so you have to shake the Wii-mote to snap him out of it.

      The poison will actually hang in the air and completely incapacitate
      Travis should he run into it.  Cloe will come after you when this
      happens.  You need to perform the weapon clash motion when she catches up
      with you to avoid injury.  You can also press A as soon as she's about to
      catch you because this will make Travis stumble forward and fall
      completely under her grasp.  Your poison will clear soon after.

      You are in danger of attack from the black things she summons no matter
      where you are on the field.  She also has a short melee combo for when
      you get close.

      Keep your distance until she does one of her charge moves.  If it's the
      scream, just run away.  If it's the laser eyes, try and get behind her to
      start a combo.  If it's the poison, get behind her and combo ASAP because
      the poison seems to dissipate faster if she's interrupted.  If it's the
      black squirmy things, try to get between them as best you can.  If they
      knock you down, don't get up until they stop coming, or they'll just
      knock you over again.

      Using the above strategy, I stuck with the Peony and noticed that it was
      so powerful and she was so frail, that one slash sent her reeling.  If
      using the Peony, don't do a full combo.  One slash at a time or a running
      slash instead.  This fight is Easy mode using this katana, to be quite
      honest.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Cloe seems a little more nimble in Bitter mode, being able to dodge your
      combos, so the Peony may not be the best weapon to use anymore unless you
      are just using it for single swipes like running slashes.

Sylvia is so mean.  :C

Back home, I was able to get Jeane down to 10.5 pounds at this point in the
game, earning the Step-In Slice move, which you perform by shaking the nunchuk.
If you don't have it yet, don't worry; you still have plenty of time to get it.

The Stings So Good side job is available; it's your last one.  Hit the gym,
avenge your friend, see Sylvia, do whatever you must to prepare for what
happens next.  It is awesome.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 10: Twofold Revenge           [r10]
    ----------------------------------------
The look of joy on my face when I first saw the next opponent was hysterical.
If the intro to this fight confuses you, play the first game please.

Leeeeeet'sss dooo thiiiiiissssss!

    Dr. Letz Shake
    --------------
      Funny, I thought Letz Shake was the dude with the guitar's name, not the
      brain.  Oh well.  He has three attacks and can kill you in a mere two
      hits.  "How do this be?" you ask?  That attack where the ground starts
      shaking, shoots up, and stuns Travis?  That takes off half of your health
      no matter how many times you ran on that treadmill.  Another attack of
      his to watch for is a laser beam he fires at you.  Easily dodged.  The
      last is close range: he pounds the ground with his four "legs" when you
      are right under him.  Back away to avoid it.  Focus on the earthquakes,
      man!

      It all starts with "Activating main engine!" and then a countdown.  You
      have until the count of three to take cover.  If the countdown sounds
      higher-pitched than normal, you have less time because he counts faster.
      Alternately, if it's a lower pitch, you have more time to run.  So take
      cover where?  There are places in the arena that are not affected by this
      earthquake move.  Those would be the spots where the ground does not
      shake when he preps the attack.  The most prominent ones are in the
      middle of the area, wherever the doctor currently is, and where the two
      chests are.

      He will move around the arena after an attack or two.  Don't be too hasty
      in chasing him.  Wait and see what he'll do first.  If he fires the
      laser, that is the perfect time to run for him.  If you are stuck on the
      outside of the arena, consider running to the middle ground to use it as
      cover until you are ready to make a break for his position.

      All you need to do to damage him is be on the same safe spot he is when
      he's performing one of his moves.  Slash like crazy while you've got him.
      When he retreats, either stay in place or make a break for either the
      middle or the doctor's next position depending on the circumstances.  I
      would go with the Peony on this one to maximize damage since speed is not
      too important when it comes to combos.  Power is.

      Simple in theory, but two screw ups with the earthquake move will cost
      you the match.  If you ever have the chance to activate the ecstasy
      Darkside Mode, do so quickly because that completely nullifies the
      earthquake attack.  The ground will shake, but it will never shoot up and
      hurt you.  (The weapon swapping animation which usually grants
      invincibility does not work here.  Thanks to Andrew for pointing this
      out.)  Otherwise, be patient.  Don't rush.  Kick his giant metal ass.

      Bitter mode tips:
      The doctor is going to move around a lot more, and it might be hard to
      keep up.  His earthquake move now takes off three-fourths of your health
      meter, so don't get caught in it or else all he'd need to do is hit you
      with a laser or one of his "feet" to potentially finish you off.  Take
      cover above all else and run after him only when you know it's safe,
      which would be when he fires a laser at you or if you hear the slow-mo
      countdown.

The next cutscene is a No More Heroes reunion, leading into our first character
swap.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 09: The Money Grubber         [r09]
    ----------------------------------------
It's Shinobu's turn to shine.  Her controls are similar to Travis' except she
can jump with the B button and perform mid-air attacks.  This is her strength,
so you will need to use it a lot to keep the upper hand, especially in the boss
fights coming up.  This also means that you get multi-tier stages, so always
look for places to jump up or over to get chests and such.

Shinobu can perform one wrestling move when enemies are dizzy by pressing the B
button.  She cannot do running slashes.  She also likes to pose and taunt at
the end of combos, which leaves her wide open.  This is her one glaring
weakness.  Showoff.

She does have several charged attacks that will prove mucho useful.  Try them
out on the enemies here.  The first is performed by holding A until her blade
starts to glow and then releasing it.  Very useful for far-off enemies.  The
second is when you hold down A and press the control stick in the direction of
an enemy while releasing A; Shinobu will do a charged forward slash.  Useful
when enemies are up close.  Holding down A will also enable Shinobu to run a
little faster than normal.

Shinobu cannot collect things like ecstasy magazines and gifts for Travis'
room, so all chests will either contain cash, pizza, or batteries.  There are
six in this main room, all of which contain CASH.

Up the escalator, the two cases on the walkways behind you contain PIZZA and
CASH.  Go left, kill the two gun guys and then the three baddies down below by
going down the stairs.  The door upstairs on the opposite side of the room will
open.  Defeat the new enemies and head up the elevator.

If you walk into the lasers here, an alarm will sound.  I think the only thing
this affects is whether or not you get three chests full of CASH in the next
room.  You'll get enemies with guns either way.  Clean up the riff raff and nab
the PIZZA in the chest in the next hallway.  More lasers to run through.

In the room with the chainsaw guys (Shinobu's mid-air combo tears these guys
apart), there are five switches you need to hit to open the door.  (Jon pointed
out in an e-mail that you can lock on to these switches, so if you have any
problems hitting them, use your lock.)  One is straight ahead from the entrance
on the western wall.  Another is on the wall in the southeastern corner, and
another one is actually right next to it on the southern wall.  The two chests
on the bottom floor here contain CASH.

Climb up on the piles of gold in the northwestern corner.  The chest here has
CASH.  Jump down a level and use the stack of gold here to jump over to the
green piles of cash.  Look to the north and you'll see a switch on the wall.
Jump and slash in mid-air to get it.  (JiMMaR also pointed out that you can
just lock on and use Shinobu's charge attack to hit it.)  Get back on that
stack of cash and climb up the next highest level on the eastern wall to get
another switch.  Get the CASH in the chest directly across from you to the
west, jump up and get the switch above the chest, and then the one to the
south.

Get the PIZZA and BATTERY in the chests by the boss door and then save.

    Million Gunman
    --------------
      Multi-level boss fight area, don't say you didn't see it coming.  This
      guy is pushover material if you work him right.  It's essentially a game
      of cat and mouse.  He'll stay in the open and fire some shots at you, and
      then he'll disappear through a door in his vault and reappear elsewhere
      in the area.  Your map only displays the level you are on, so if you
      don't see his skull icon, move up or down.

      Don't think he can't hit you if you can't see him.  His shots will
      ricochet against the gold in the vault.  Either always keep Z pressed or
      dodge.

      When you do find him, all you need to do is lock on and wait for him to
      raise his gun (usually accompanied by a cry of "Fuck you!").  That's your
      cue to jump over him and start a slash combo in mid-air.  If you are
      doing a ground combo, only do a few slashes at a time.  A full combo will
      probably end with Shinobu doing her "end of the combo taunt + pose" and
      will earn her bullets in the face.

      Speaking of bullets in the face, if you should happen to get caught in a
      close range volley of gunfire, Shinobu will block the bullets, but she
      can only block them for so long before she lets up and starts taking
      damage.  Take enough bullets and she'll end up stunned.  When you see her
      blocking, start emergency evading underneath the gunfire.  Million Gunman
      will let up to reload or stop simply because he isn't hitting you.  You
      are then free to counter.

      Shinobu can dark step around bullets, but Million Gunman fires so many at
      once that it's hard to avoid them all, especially if he's standing next
      to one of the vault's many walls and Shinobu happens to dark step right
      into it.  Standing close to Million Gunman, waiting for the chance to
      dark step, is not wise since he can and will grab you by the throat and
      pistol whip you.

      Million Gunman is quite the nimble old man.  He will have no problem
      rolling under your combos, but one slice from Shinobu is usually enough
      to knock him off balance, so if you can get just one slice in while he's
      aiming, you're golden.  You can also knock him off his feet when he is
      running away from you; in fact, this is the best time to enter a full
      ground combo because the last forward thrust will completely knock
      Million Gunman on his face, and he doesn't get up too quickly.

      Your power-ups are on the highest tier if you need them, and you have
      plenty of opportunities to sharpen your blade should the need arise.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Million Gunman seems a lot more eager to run like a pansy in Bitter mode,
      and he usually does so after trying to fill Shinobu full of holes.  He
      slows down for the second half of the fight, and it should be no harder
      than in Mild.

A friend of Bishop's will give Shinobu a present for Travis.  It is a hell of a
present, too.  But we still have one more fight before we can give it to him.

Bishop's friend is none other than Takashi Miike, a prolific Japanese filmmaker
of whom Travis and Bishop are/were huge fans.  (In the first game, Bishop
sometimes talked about the latest Miike whenever you went to visit him at Beef
Head.)  Thanks to Jon for e-mailing in this info.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 08: Here We Go Again          [r08]
    ----------------------------------------
Despite the look of the map for this area, the path is still pretty linear.
Most of the enemies here will be coming at you in cars.  Note that they can hit
you with their cars, and it will hurt.  You'll be fighting a lot of big fist
fighters and samurai sword wielders.  Guys with guns, too.  The "jump over them
and start a slash combo in mid-air" strategy works wonders on them, especially
as a way to dodge their charge attacks.  You can also kill the smaller guys
with one combo this way.

The first chest you see on your right has some PIZZA in it.  You'll see lots of
enemies drop pizza and batteries, so you shouldn't be hurting for it too much.
There's also PIZZA in a chest to your left after you jump the trailer to get to
the northeast area with the fencing.

Get the CASH in the chest ahead and climb the nearby boxes.  Work your way
along the metal rooftops and kill the big guy up here.  Consider jumping down
in the big area in the middle to get the eight chests down here: two with
PIZZA, one with a BATTERY, and the rest with CASH.  Now get back up to the roof
using the trailer and boxes near where you found the three chests clustered
together, watching for gunfire.

Make your way along the rooftops now.  I like to use Shinobu's long range
attacks to snipe the enemies on different rooftops because they are apparently
not smart enough to cross over to yours.  There's PIZZA in a chest for you if
you drop from the fourth rooftop.  Three CASH chests await you at the end of
the rooftop run.

Two more groups of enemies stand in your way before you reach the pre-boss save
point.  Grab the BATTERY, PIZZA, and CASH before entering the warehouse to find

    New Destroyman
    --------------
    No.

    No!

    NO!

    ;___;

    The one other boss they had to bring back from the first game is Mr. "I Can
    Shoot Lasers from My Crotch"?!  And there's TWO OF HIM?  I thought the main
    side effect of being cut in half was death.  Shows what I know.

    Anywho, yes there are two of him.  One of them is going to be in your face
    constantly; we'll call him Destroyman #1.  The other - Destroyman #2 - is
    going to fly around the rafters and shoot lasers at you.  Probably from his
    crotch.  Like when he was whole, Destroyman yells the name of his attack
    before he unleashes it.

    Stuff you need to watch out for from #1: Destroy Spark, a blast of
    electricity that will stun you; basic melee combos; a flying lunge attack;
    charge attacks; and Destroy Beam, a laser attack, though this one is rare
    coming from him.  Stuff to watch from #2: Destroy Beam, the crotch laser,
    which seems to come from his eyes now; Destroy Cannon, a glowing blue ball
    that homes in on you and can actually hurt Destroyman #1 as well.  Stuff to
    watch from both: Destroy Buster - this is whenever both Destroymen start
    focusing their energy into a large mass in the middle of the area, try your
    best to run away and hide behind some junk as it will try and pull you in.

    Shinobu can block all the attacks from Destroyman #1 except for Destroy
    Spark and his charge attacks.  The only move of Destroyman #2's she can
    block is the Destroy Beam.  She cannot perform wrestling moves on either
    one, to my knowledge.

    There is something very important you need to do in this fight.  You must
    make sure Destroyman #1 is killed in the rafters.  You'll see why.  For the
    start of the fight, lead #1 behind the wall in the southern part of the
    map.  Fight with him here and it should keep you shielded from #2.  This
    will also protect you from the Destroy Buster.  To damage #1, always keep Z
    held and do your mid-air combos when he's doing anything except the Destroy
    Spark.  When he does do Destroy Spark, run away, charge a long range
    attack, and let it go when he runs up to you; it will stun him.  Pretty
    simple; just remember to keep Z held down in case you need to block an
    attack from #2 and don't do a mid-air combo when #1 does the Destroy Spark
    or Shinobu will land right in it.

    When #1's almost dead, climb to the rafters and try to get on the middle
    one with the chests.  Kill him here if you can.  No, you must.

    Here's why: when one is dead, the other will try to revive him.  When #1 is
    dead, #2 will begin flying around the rafters, shooting at you with the
    Destroy Beam, his easiest attack to dodge (not to mention if he shoots from
    the ground, the rafters block it for you).  The middle rafter is the best
    place to stand your ground.  He will eventually come back to try and revive
    his buddy, but if he died on the middle rafter, all you have to do is stand
    over his body and use it as bait.

    He will not counter your attacks, and now the fight is easy, since all you
    have to do is stand over #1.  You can duplicate this strategy on the
    ground; I've tried it and it takes much longer.  I found it easier to stay
    in the rafters since that's where #2 liked to hang out the most.  Plus, if
    he's in the opposite rafter, you can fire long range attacks at him.  Also,
    you don't have to deal with boxes and junk on the ground.

    To recap: hide out behind the southern wall and fight Destroyman #1 there.
    Move to middle rafters when he has one bead of health left.  Kill him
    there.  Stand over Destroyman #1 and always keep a long range attack
    charged.  Fire at Destroyman #2 when he is in the other rafter and when he
    lands on the middle rafter.  Combo him when he runs over to Destroyman #1.
    He follows a strict pattern; it's easy to read his moves.

    It might take a while to kill the second Destroyman since he's all about
    the running away, but I like to play it safe, and I never want to see two
    of him alive at the same time ever again.

    Ever.

    Bitter mode tips:
    No real changes here using the strategy above.

Thank you, Travis.  My thoughts exactly.

Since Travis ruined his chances with Shinobu, say goodbye since that's the last
we'll see of her for a while.  Stand over Henry and laugh at him for a bit and
then move into the living room to get your present from Bishop's friend, the
Rose Nasty katana set.  Dual wielding action, baby, yeah!  Read WEEKLY BACKDROP
06 on the shelf and do what you gotta do to get ready for the next fight.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 07: Cheap Dragon              [r07]
    ----------------------------------------
This fight is not one of my favorites because it's a cocktease and a little
overwhelming compared to what we've faced so far.  There's no foreplay; the
fight starts right in the thick of it.

    Ryuji
    -----
      You start on your bike, the Schpeltiger.  A is accelerate, B is brake,
      and Z is your nitro.  You and Ryuji are going to play chicken, trying to
      knock each other off the cliff.  Sounds awesome until you experience how
      loose the Schpeltiger's controls are and how hard it is to turn tight
      circles and get Ryuji in prime position to get knocked off. He has much
      better control over his bike, whereas you might end up knocking yourself
      off the cliff just trying to turn.  Ryuji can burn out and gain extra
      speed.  The Schpeltiger used to be able to burn out, but it doesn't seem
      like it can anymore, so you are at a disadvantage already.

      I knocked him off by hanging out at the northern end of the area and
      waiting for him to stop and rev up across from me.  (If I needed to get
      him over there, I'd run a lap around the cliff and he'd usually follow
      me out.)  I then held A and Z and just kept ramming him.  Eventually he'd
      get dizzy and then a couple more shoves would do it.  If he started
      revving again before I could push him off, I'd have to retreat to the
      north again.  I wish it were more exciting than that.

      There's also the off-chance that Ryuji will simply drive off the cliff
      himself.

      The real fight starts when he climbs back up and gets out his spear.
      Ryuji's moves include a charge attack that thrusts him forward (he'll
      yell "See you!" and his spear will glow purple before doing it); a quick
      succession of jabs when his spear glows yellow, ending with a charge
      attack; a couple close-range swipes with his spear; and a really cheap
      gimmick.  But more on that later.

      I originally tried dark stepping around Ryuji's attacks.  The problem
      with this is that most of his combos end with charged attacks, and you
      are not invulnerable while dark stepping.  Then I tried dodging around
      his attacks to try and counter, and I just couldn't keep up.

      While running away from him to buy time, I noticed he would continually
      do the "See you!" forward thrust attack to try and chase after me.  Then
      I saw how open he was after this move.  The strategy that emerged is
      this: continually run away from Ryuji and force him to do the forward
      thrust.  Dodge it or stay out of range and then move in and combo him
      when he's open.  This is the safest way to avoid damage for those of us
      that simply cannot keep up with him.  It seems unfair, but so is Ryuji's
      gimmick.

      After your first death blow, Ryuji will start summoning a giant electric
      purple dragon.  (He will be surrounded by an electrical charge and say
      "Come out, dragon.")  This dragon is the cheapest move ever.  First off,
      a shockwave surrounds Ryuji when it's summoned, so if you are close to
      him you're already on the dirt at this point.  The thing homes in on your
      position and will sometimes attack you in a way that is impossible to
      dodge.  It will also dive underground and emerge below you.  To make
      matters worse, Ryuji will be attacking you as well while the dragon is
      flying around trying to ruin your shit.

      The best thing to do to counter this dragon is run.  Don't stay
      unnecessarily close to Ryuji in case he starts to summon it.  If you are,
      instantly start dodge-rolling away.  The dragon is at its most dangerous
      when it's first summoned, so you will need to watch for its head and
      dodge at least twice and then start running around the perimeter of the
      arena.  This should keep you ahead of the dragon and you shouldn't need
      to dodge anymore.  Just keep running.  When you see the sky brighten up
      again, the dragon has receded.

      Ryuji doesn't ever let up; he's a fast fighter, and baiting him is the
      best way to go about dealing damage.  Preserving health is key because of
      that damn dragon.  This fight would be so much better without the
      gimmick, but it is what it is.  Take what you have and make the most of
      it.

      Some final notes: save ecstasy Darkside Mode if you get it for when Ryuji
      summons his dragon.  From Sleet Wintergreen: "He cannot dodge Darkside
      slashes while he is summoning the dragon.  And since the electricity will
      not hurt you in DC mode and he's stuck summoning the dragon in slow
      motion, you can easily knock off around half his health while he just has
      to stand there and take it."  Nice.  As for katanas, this is a great
      opportunity to try Rose Nasty.  Its low slash combo works especially
      well against Ryuji.

      Bitter mode tips:
      During the bike portion of the fight, Ryuji will rev his bike a lot more.
      He leaves himself dangerously close to the edge, meaning he will either
      drive off himself or you can push him off easily if you can only get the
      Schpeltiger turned around fast enough.

      As for the real fight, THAT F%@^&$ING DRAGON.  Four hits from this thing
      can kill you, and considering it homes in on you when it is first
      summoned and can get in two hits if it knocks you down, you REALLY need
      to bone up on your dodging.  Consider this: instead of dropping your lock
      on Ryuji and running away, stay locked on him and run away.  Your camera
      will focus on Ryuji and give you a prime view of the dragon behind you.
      This should make it easier to see which direction it is coming from and
      will up your chances of successfully dodging.  There is also a slim
      chance Travis will block the dragon as long as it does not hit him head-
      on or erupt from underneath him.

      Ryuji is a piece of cake using the baiting strategy outlined above; it is
      possible to sustain no damage from the man himself.

The scene afterwards may or may not bother you, depending on what you thought
about the fight.  Even though I hate Ryuji... it bothered me.

After you save, go out and- wait.  Could it be?  IT IS!


                   ----------------------------------------


    Sir Henry's Nightmare              [hnm]
    ----------------------------------------
I don't know about you guys, but I have been dying to play as Sir Henry
Motherfucker for quite some time.  Here we go!

    Mimmy
    -----
      Like Shinobu, Henry controls much like Travis except his B move is a
      dash.  That will come in handy in this fight like you wouldn't believe.
      Henry's weapon never loses its charge, even when blocking attacks
      repeatedly.

      Mimmy is going to teleport and dash around the field like crazy.  She
      will only sit still when she's unleashing an attack.  Her moves include
      freakishly enlarging her robot hands and spinning around while moving
      towards you, detaching her hands and hurling them at you, flying into the
      air and then slamming her fists on the ground, enlarging a single hand
      and swiping at you with it, flying in the air while counting down before
      she fires her fists at you, and resting both of her gigantic hands on
      the ground and firing a laser.

      Henry's long range attack is impressive, and if you charge it up and wait
      until she sits still long enough to start an attack before you release
      it, then it will disrupt her and do some really great damage.

      To get close enough to slash her, you need to wait until she starts an
      attack like the laser or the arm swipe, something easily dodged at close
      range.  Then dash up, get behind her, and start a combo.  You won't get
      too many swipes before she teleports away.  Henry's combo is short
      anyway, but you can extend it by changing stances midway.

      You can combine the long range attack strategy with the slash combo by
      using Henry's dash.  Try unleashing a long range attack as soon as Mimmy
      starts one of her own.  Immediately start dashing up to her after your
      attacks and you should be able to reach her in time to start a slash
      combo.

      If you're having problems keeping up with Mimmy, then you are not using
      Henry's B move correctly.  If you tap B, he will *fly* all over the field
      and give Mimmy a run for her money.  Just don't get so dash-crazy that
      you end up dashing right into an attack of hers.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Mimmy seemed to run less and attack more on Bitter, which only made the
      fight easier when using the above strategy.
      
Henry is so badass, he got me through this fight without taking a single hit
from this anime nightmare.  I can't believe I ever hated this guy.

Oh, right.  Now I remember.  He's a damn snatcher, and he has just robbed us
all of the chance to play through three ranked fights Shinobu-style with him
because "the game's stuffed full as it is".  He's not only taunting Travis with
those pictures, he's taunting you.  What an asshole!

(This is actually a good move on Suda 51's part since this is so amazingly in-
character for Henry: he's a gigantic troll.  Still, one more fight would have
been nice.)

Grab WEEKLY BACKDROPS 07 from the shelf and head out.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 04: The Goddess of Death      [r04]
    ----------------------------------------
This parking lot is a free-for-all.  If you wanted to practice certain moves or
try out different katanas, this is the place to do it.  Cars will continually
pile in and enemies will come pouring out.  You'll get a little bit of
everything here, enemy type-wise.  You need to kill everyone to progress, and
it might take a while because they never seem to stop coming.  They will
eventually though, so just keep slashing.  Remember to go for death blows for
many of your kills to get the slots to spin.  In a fight this long, you are
almost guaranteed a ringer or two or three.  The vans pouring into the lot can
hit and hurt you, but that goes for all enemies in the lot as well.

The chests contain BATTERIES, ECSTASY MAGAZINES, UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.23,
UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.10, and UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.9.

Inside, there's PIZZA in the chest to your right if you need it.  Fighting
enemies in the aisles here might be tricky, especially in groups.  Remember to
use the Peony for the bigger guys and your flavor of choice for the others.
The chests in the aisles contain UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.8, CASH, and UAA
KILLER COLLECTION NO.7.  The one farther up by the exit and the gang of big
guys holds a SCHPELTIGER PLASTIC MODEL.  Save up and head to the roof, getting
the PIZZA and BATTERY on the way.

    Margaret
    --------
      One of my favorite intros and stages; who doesn't love fighting by a full
      moon?  Margaret is going to start up high on the billboard and aim her
      rifle at you.  When it focuses on Travis' head, that's the time to dodge.
      She will stay up there until you run along the roof underneath the
      billboard, at which point she will fly up and come crashing down to your
      level.  Keep a lock on her and dodge when she glows purple.

      At this point, you want to move the fight to the large western area.
      When you are close to her, Margaret will do some slash combos and flip
      kicks.  None of which are anything you can't handle or haven't seen at
      this point.  It's definitely recommended you keep as close as possible by
      dodging forward underneath her attacks.

      Problem with keeping close is that she can teleport and jump away and
      will begin firing her weapon at you.  She'll yell "Here I come!" and will
      fire when she glows purple.  That purple glow is your cue to dodge as
      well.  Travis can block these shots, but it drains the battery something
      awful.  Keep a lock on Margaret do your dodge-rolls forward under her
      shots to get close.  Get close enough and she'll swap out her guns.  She
      will dance around some of your combos, but she can't dodge 'em all.  She
      can't dodge around Travis in ecstasy mode, I can tell you that much.

      See the area on the map to the north with the two chests?  That's your
      safety area for when you need to recharge.  Margaret will keep her
      distance so she can keep firing at you, so just be sure to dodge her
      shots as you retreat and come back.  You can hide behind the generator-
      looking things on the roof, but those are destructible.  That's actually
      a good thing because someone stuffed pizza and extra batteries in there.

      When she's almost dead, she will teleport back up to the billboard.  Just
      like at the start, you need to walk back over to the eastern part of the
      roof underneath her to get her to come back down.  Don't forget to watch
      for the laser sight and dodge while getting there.  After this, she
      should be done in just a few more slash combos.

      Bitter mode tips:
      The one difference I noticed in this fight was that Margaret could dodge
      every single one of Travis' slashes in ecstasy Darkside Mode.  An
      anonymous e-mailer wrote in a way to get around this though: "The key is
      to activate it, slash at her until you start missing, let her jump away/
      attack you, then start slashing again."

If you've been keeping up with the Revenge Missions and the gym and such, there
might not be much left for you to do in Santa Destroy besides earning money and
then blowing it all at Airport 51.

Hit the highway when ready.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 03: The Lost Spaceman         [r03]
    ----------------------------------------
Bike controls are the same as when you fought Ryuji.  Just burn the nitro and
follow the road.  Try and hit as much junk as you can because that refills your
nitro gauge.  You can also do jumps for a change of pace by shaking the
Wii-mote.

    Captain Vladimir
    ----------------
      Vladimir has a shield in front of him at all times and can teleport from
      one side of the field to another at will.  His attacks are very limited.
      When you are far away from him, he will pick up rocks and hurl them at
      you.  Stay back and dodge each one because even if you get up to him, he
      will still hit you with them without damaging himself, miraculously
      enough.  When you are close, he fires a single laser in front of him.
      Another threat is when several lasers will fire from space and focus on
      points around the field.  These are easy enough to dodge, especially if
      you keep out of the grass; watch for small light spots on the ground.
      When he flies in the air, he's either going to fire those little lasers
      or a really big one that shoots towards the ground and expands.  Run
      away!

      His single laser attack is perfect for you to get behind him and his
      shield and start a slash combo.  In fact, his attack pattern is so easy
      to figure out and this attack is so easy to dodge, that you should have
      no problem whatsoever building your ecstasy gauge.  DON'T use it yet if
      you do!

      When Vladimir's shield is down (when he's down to around 1/4 of his
      health), he gains a new attack.  This one is a super-charged laser that
      will knock you on your ass and deplete most of your charge should you be
      blocking when it hits.  He glows bright blue and spins right before
      firing it.  He turns faster than with the other laser, too, raising his
      chances of hitting you with it.

      THIS is when you want to use ecstasy Darkside Mode.  If all goes well,
      you should be able to finish him with it.  If not, you just have to dodge
      around this big laser to get close enough to do a slash combo.  You can
      weapon clash with this laser as well if your timing is right.  Of all his
      attacks, the laser remains the easiest to get around.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Surprisingly, Captain Vladimir does not seem to be any tougher than in
      Mild.  He might teleport a bit more than usual, which is usually
      accompanied by the "multiple lasers from space" attack.  Whatever worked
      the first time will work this time.

Get WEEKLY BACKDROPS 08 from the shelf back home.  We're almost there.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 02: An Assassin Named...      [r02]
    ----------------------------------------
This location unnerved me the first time I played here, but the larger than-
life image on the building at the end of the first section intrigued me more
than anything.  Seeing as how this place is in an Akashic point, it could be
anywhere or when, and the supernatural may be involved.  This and the music
(or lack thereof in some places) just really helped build excitement for the
fight.

There's really not that much I can type to help on your trek through the city.
It's nothing you haven't seen before and, like the parking lot free-for-all, is
a good way to practice using any moves or katanas you want.  I use it to get
more acquainted with Rose Nasty and how awesome it is.

In this first section of the city, there are chests that contain CASH and UAA
KILLER COLLECTION DREAM ASSASSIN.  UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.4 is in the only
chest in the next section, the parking lot.

Right ahead of you in the building is UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.3.  I'd switch
to the Peony inside because you've got a lot of big guys crowding the halls.
There's PIZZA in the next section of the building.  I'd save it since you have
to face quite a few guys in here, culminating in three chainsaw dudes at once.

Back outside, a mellow track takes over.  You can find PIZZA in the chest here.
Not much else until you get to the playground.  Save and head up to the roof.

    Alice
    -----
      For being ranked second, Alice can be pretty easy.  When she is reared up
      on her mechanical limbs like at the start of the fight, she's going to
      toss light sabers at you.  She'll do this twice each time and won't stop
      until you get close to her, at which point she'll glow yellow and fall
      forward.  Dodge backward from this and start slashing when she falls, as
      this leaves her extremely open.  Slash her enough and she'll revert to
      using her normal legs.

      When on the ground, she's going to do a series of slash combos, all of
      which can be blocked.  When she glows yellow, dodge instead of block
      since that's a little tougher to handle.

      Alice is quick, but you can read all of her moves.  It's just a matter of
      catching her at the end of a combo.  The Step-In Slice that Jeane taught
      you does wonders here when she's on the ground, especially with Rose
      Nasty.  It helps you close the gap while dealing damage to her, and it
      also disrupts most of her moves, leaving her open for more.  Don't bother
      with Darkside Mode; Alice is too quick and will dodge every blow, unless
      perhaps she is up on her mechanical limbs.

      If you find her ground combos hard to handle, back away and force Alice
      to rear up and start throwing things at you.  Dodge under them, get
      close, bait her to the ground, and combo.  The one problem with her
      projectiles is that you risk getting stuck.  If one hits you, Travis
      kisses the dirt.  When you try to get back up, Alice will have already
      started throwing more, causing Travis to most likely get hit again.  And
      again.  And again.  And again.  Time your recovery so you get up between
      throws and have enough time to dodge away.

      Keeping a charge is important here.  Luckily, you have tons of places to
      take cover, and Alice will not chase you around.  She'd rather throw
      things.  There are no gimmicks in this fight; it's pretty fair except for
      the fact that she has more weapons than you.

      Bitter mode tips:
      The Alice fight's difficulty is ramped up a bit for Bitter mode.  The
      basics of the fight haven't changed; her speed might have increased so
      it's easy to jump the gun and end up getting caught in a lot of her
      attacks.  She's going to jump and dodge around the roof so quickly that
      you might have difficulty landing hits.  What works here is an odd mix of
      defensive and offensive strategy.  Try attacking Alice so she hops around
      and dodges most of your blows.  When you see her calm down and start an
      attack of her own, stop what you're doing and use your emergency evades
      to roll forward under her attacks.  You should then be in prime position
      to start some combos.  This works especially well with her charge
      attacks; wait for the telltale yellow glow before rolling forward.

      Using running slashes and the Step-In Slice to close the gap between you
      and Alice isn't recommended this time.  They still do a great job of
      stunning her, but there is a good chance you will perform these attacks
      as she is prepping a charge attack, and this leaves you extremely open.

      The best thing to do in this fight is not under-estimate Alice's reach.
      Her mechanical arms can bitch slap you from a good distance.  Always keep
      Z held to block her normal attacks, and ALWAYS dodge roll when she glows
      yellow.  If you run away instead of roll, you are still most likely in
      her hit area and you risk accidentally running into some of the junk on
      the roof.  You or Alice will most likely clear the crap with normal
      attacks halfway through the fight, but dodge-rolling is just better
      because of the inherent invincibility.

After several important victories, read WEEKLY BACKDROPS 09 and 10 on the
shelf and do whatever you need to do.  This is the last time you'll get to
prance around Santa Destroy before having to reload a save file, so make the
most of it.


                   ----------------------------------------


    Rank 01: Revenge                   [r01]
    ----------------------------------------
The prelude to our big fight is very much like those before the Margaret and
Alice fights.  I'm pretty sure you can handle all these guys by now.  In case
you've forgotten, the basic rules are 1) kill guys with guns first, 2) use the
Peony against the bigger guys with katanas, axes, fists, swords, and chainsaws,
3) use ecstasy mode when surrounded, and 4) go for the slots whenever possible.

The chests in this first area contain an ECSTASY MAGAZINE, a BATTERY, and a
SURFBOARD.

Up the escalator, you'll get waves of enemies coming from the elevators.  The
chest to your right has an ... ASS WARMER (or washer, I don't know, this font
is hard to read, you guys).  The two chests on the side of the metal bars
have PIZZA and a BATTERY.  The chest on the other side of the area has a MOTEL
CARPET.  Our room is going to look interesting when we get back.

Up the escalator, more enemies will pile out of the elevators here.  Work your
way around the area to a chest with UAA KILLER COLLECTION NO.2.  Kill everyone
and pop in the elevator.

This next stretch is the last.  There's CASH and PIZZA in this first room.  In
the room after the exclamation point on the map here, you are going to get bum
rushed by waves of enemies.  There's PIZZA and a BATTERY in here to help.
There's also some more just outside the door to help with the enemies coming at
you in the hall.  More power-ups are in the next hall as well.

The last room before the save point is the last onslaught with a bunch of the
more annoying enemies.  The chest here is your last gift, UAA KILLER COLLECTION
NO.1.  You should be at 100% if you did all the Revenge Missions.

Before you enter the boss room, get out your dictionary of common obscenities
and open it to FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU

This cutscene is horrible.

    Jasper Batt Jr.
    ---------------
      I'm gonna save you the hatred you'll feel later and tell you now that
      there are three stages to this fight.  THREE.

      The first one should be your first hint: it's pretty damn simple.  Jasper
      will fly his little car just out of your range, from one corner of the
      room to the other.  Two different kinds of laser attacks will fire from
      his little bat friends.  One is a bunch of tiny lasers zipping across the
      room.  The other is a more concentrated, powerful laser from the middle
      of the room.

      His driving animation from one corner to another also counts as an
      attack, and that will come in handy later.

      What you need to do is hang out under Jasper in whatever corner he's in.
      When the concentrated laser homes in on you, it will hit Jasper instead
      and knock him to the floor.  Slash, slash, slash.

      After a while, you'll notice that Jasper will no longer lose health even
      when you slash him repeatedly after using the laser on him.  This is when
      you need to confront him when he drives across the room.  Try and slash
      him from the side or head-on and you should get in a weapons clash and
      lose.

      Never fear!  The Amazing Flying Irishman is here!  I'm so happy to see
      him, I almost forgot why I hated him.

      Henry will now keep the bats occupied in the corner of the room.
      Jasper's only attack now is to throw explosives at you and zip from
      corner to corner.  All you need to do is weapon clash with him like you
      did to bring in Henry.  Win, and Jasper will be thrown off and you can
      slash him.  If you ever fill the ecstasy gauge, save it.

      If you got his health down as low as possible with the lasers, you might
      only have to clash once.  I got to do three death blows in a row on him
      and that was the match.

      Bitter mode tips:
      The lasers the bats fire seem to move quicker around the room but this is
      a moot point since all you need to do to avoid them is stand in a corner
      of the room.  You really should not find this any difficult than usual
      following the above strategy.  Obviously, the less damage you take, the
      better because the worst is yet to come.

    Pizza Batt Man
    --------------
      This next stage is the equivalent of a kick to the face.  Or the balls
      if you're a guy since that hurts more I guess.

      First off, Henry is a dick.  He will stand in the corner with his arms
      crossed, watching you fight and most likely die.  I've gone over to him
      and tried to get Travis to beg for his help, but no dice.  The guy is a
      bona fide ass, and I hate him.  I can't believe he'd just sit back and
      watch when we all know he wants to kill Travis himself.  What a douche.

      Back to the monstrosity in front of us.  The first thing you should do is
      use your ecstasy gauge if you filled it in the last fight.

      Okay, as for attacks, he can grab you for a wrestling move; he can summon
      bats to attack you; he can do some punch combos; he can do a huge forward
      punch; he has a shockwave attack where he raises his arms and pounds the
      floor; and he can teleport.  Oh, can he ever teleport.  More on that
      later.

      For the first stage, focus on staying close to him and wait until he
      finishes an attack to go in and start a combo.  The grabbing attack and
      shockwave?  They use the "charge attack" sound and effects, so just run
      away when you see it.  The combos?  Block them and then dodge away
      because the third blow is charged.  The bats?  Dodge forward under them
      and start comboing Batt Man when you're close.  The huge forward punch?
      Dodge-roll forward and you'll pop up right behind the big guy.

      The best thing you can do here is not be hasty.  You need to preserve
      your health in any way possible.  Always wait for an opening.  For those
      of you who want to be the one to hit first, try using the Step-In Slice.
      I used this with Rose Nasty and noticed a pattern.  When Batt Man was
      prancing around, taunting me, I rushed in and Step-In Sliced his face.
      This phased him a little and then he immediately went for a charge
      attack.  Those are easy to avoid, so all it took was an evade move to the
      side and we were back to square one.  So give this a shot.

      After your first death blow, Batt Man gets a new attack.  He'll start
      rapidly teleporting right in Travis' face and will do three charged
      punches.  It is insanely hard to dodge these because it's hard to see the
      attack coming.  He will also use this attack SEVERAL TIMES IN A ROW.  My
      advice is to start dodge rolling as soon as you lose your lock on him or
      hear the teleporting noise (Emily has e-mailed me saying dodge rolling
      back and forth from side-to-side works fairly well, so I'd go with it).
      If you get hit, don't get up right away in case he starts spamming the
      move.  I've seen him do it up to four times in a row before.

      Another way to avoid this attack is to stand your ground and parry it.
      Travis' parry move blocks charged attacks.  The downside here is that
      parrying requires excellent timing.  As soon as you hear the teleporting
      sound, wait a beat and tap Z.  If done correctly, Travis will withstand
      the attack.  This does not interrupt Batt Man's three-part set, so be
      prepared to do it two more times (or more if he starts spamming, and he
      will).  You can also take this one step further and perform the parry
      attack, which results in an automatic low charged slash.

      After your second death blow, the next totally unfair attack of his comes
      into play.  Remember the forward punch charge attack he used to do?  Now
      it's a teleporting move similar to the last one mentioned, except this
      one shoots gusts of air that all converge on your position.  It's hard to
      dodge this one, to be honest, but it can be done.  This one cannot be
      parried, so start dodging.

      Make absolutely sure you are NEVER standing in front of the windows of
      this room.  Batt Man can knock you clean out of them.  Bam.  Dead.  Even
      at full health.

      You want to know the funny thing?  He did that to me right after I typed
      it.  I was at full health.  He only had one hit left to die, too.

      brb crying now





      Okay, I'm good.  Don't let that happen to you, whatever you do.

      The best way to damage Batt Man hands down is with wrestling moves.
      The move you learned from your last trip to the motel, the Giant Swing,
      is particularly awesome.  I do not know a surefire way to dizzy him, but
      I do know that I got to use it on him two or three times by low-slashing
      him with Rose Nasty.  If you ever hear the "dizzy" noise, drop what you
      are doing immediately and wrestle.  It makes a huge difference, and you
      don't even have to swing the Wii-mote to perform the Giant Swing (lol
      MadWorld reference, sorry I had to sneak it in).

      Some extra contributed tips to help with this fight:
      Jason suggests using the Peony if you are extra careful when you swing
      it.  "Make sure that there is enough of an opening to swing the katana.
      I can usually hit him twice, and if I'm lucky, 3 times.  Also, if you
      shake the Wiimote, that step in attack is like 3 times as fast as a
      normal swing, so that can set up/end combos fairly nicely."  I'm on the
      fence about using the Peony, but I can't ignore the fact that this katana
      is so powerful that it will make even Batt Man stumble after being hit
      with a charged or running slash.  Jason's note about the running slash
      being quicker than normal moves is spot on: if Batt Man stumbles, you can
      hit him with three running slashes before he teleports away.

      Jeremy sent in his notes on this fight and a tried-and-tested strategy
      using Rose Nasty.  "I basically never used the charge attack through the
      entire game; you rarely have time to charge it, it leaves you too
      vulnerable, and it depletes your battery too fast.  However, for phase 2
      of this fight, it was awesome.
      "Any time he teleports away from you, you have plenty of time to charge
      your attack.  Wait for him to start walking forward, and start charging
      it up.  When he gets close, unload.  You can be hit while charging up,
      but once you release it, you are [invulnerable] until the animation plays
      out.  The great thing about this is that the animation is longer than
      most of his attacks, so even if you miss him, he'll do whatever he's
      going to do and it won't hurt you at all.  Generally I would finish the
      animation as he finished his, which would let me then go into a regular
      slash combo before he teleported away again.
      "Also, at least for me, I found that I was timing it well enough that if
      he was in the middle of a teleport/punch combo, I'd come out of the
      animation and still have time to dodge his last punch by just mashing the
      dodge button after releasing the charge attack.  He also gives you tons
      of time to recharge batteries whenever he teleports away, so battery
      gauge was never an issue."

      Bitter mode tips:
      Luckily (?) for us, there are no added gimmicks for Bitter mode here; the
      regular fight has enough of them already.  You just need to worry about
      minimizing damage to Travis because you've got nothing to help you here
      except the very slight comeback awarded by shaking the Wii-motes upon
      "death".

      Dealing lots of damage quickly is a definite must, so consider forgoing
      basic combos in favor of something with a little more bite, like charged
      attacks, running slashes, or the Step-In Slice.  Pizza Batt Man's attacks
      in the first part of the fight are incredibly easy to read and with any
      luck, you can last until the first death blow without taking a single
      hit, which should give you a full ecstasy gauge (or close to it) by the
      time the move-spamming charge punches come into play.  Let 'er rip and
      then do what you can to avoid his new charge attacks, be it dodge or
      parry.

    Pizza Batt Mascot
    -----------------
      wat

      Okay, there's not much you can do here beside get in the thing's face
      (er, belly, whatever) and slice away.  It's going to reach down and try
      to swipe or pound you, but it's so slow you should see this coming a mile
      away and should be able to dodge.

      There are also times during the fight where he will float away and fire a
      laser at you.  This isn't the first laser attack you've had to deal with.
      You should be able to dodge these in your sleep by now.  However, you can
      also weapon clash with these and fire them back at him, leaving him
      stunned and open for a few combos.

      The camera is going to be working against you for most of this fight.
      It might be hard to see at times, but it's not impossible to work out the
      visual cues to dodge.

      If you can fill the ecstasy gauge, go for it.  Not all of your hits will
      land, but you can't pass up invincibility at a time like this.

      This fight should be over fairly quickly.

      Bitter mode tips:
      Suda 51 may be a troll, but do you honestly think he'd make this part of
      the fight any harder after the rape you most likely just went through?
      This should hopefully be business as usual.

Congrats!  Bishop is avenged!  Enjoy the ending credits!  You really earned
them this time.

Be sure to save, too.  All the benefits of this are outlined later in the
walkthrough.  There's still fun to be had.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Exercising Jeane                 [eje]
----------------------------------------
    Jeane has grown into a fat, lazy lump of fur.  She weighs a whopping 24
    pounds now.  You need to get her back into shape.  Since dieting puts her
    in a foul mood, you need to get her spirits up before you exercise her.
    Each exercise will decrease her mood meter, but snacks put it right back
    up.

    The key to getting the most out of this is to feed her a snack and fill up
    four or all five mood markers, and then work her by playing, stretching,
    etc.  You can't do any exercise or feeding more than once per session, but
    you should do all of them each time.  Remember, Jeane is a cat.  Cats are
    fickle.  There is no one surefire pattern to follow when getting her to
    lose weight.  In fact, you shouldn't follow a specific pattern at all.  If
    you do the same routine each time, it will bore Jeane and she will not lose
    much weight.  Switch it up.

    Play
    ----
      Use foxtails to get Jeane to pounce.  The control stick will let you
      wiggle it back and forth.  I've gotten Jeane to lose some good weight
      playing when her mood was low, so you might want to save this exercise
      for when she's feeling down.

    Jump
    ----
      Use a mouse on a string to get Jeane to jump.  Hold A and release it
      immediately when prompted so she just misses the mouse.  I've had Jeane
      lose almost a whole pound playing this game.  Definitely worth it if done
      right.

    Stretch
    -------
      This is more of a workout for Travis or you than Jeane.  Mash A and
      Travis will help her stretch.  If you're having problems using your
      thumb, try your index finger.  Either Travis' strength or Jeane's weight
      impacts this exercise; in any case, it's harder the earlier in the game
      you do it, but you lose a good amount of weight.

    Massage
    -------
      Give Jeane a good rub.  Nestle the control stick in your palm and follow
      the motions on the screen.  Even when Jeane is in a bad mood, you can get
      her to lose some good weight here.

    Feed
    ----
      Use the food to raise Jeane's spirits before you drain them with
      exercise.  I've fed Jeane a lot of food and never noticed her gain any
      weight from it, so these must be diet cat snacks.  The more expensive,
      the higher the mood.

    I recommend feeding Jeane a snack to get her mood up and then either play
    with her or get her to jump for you as those seem to take off the most
    pounds.  You can then do the other options until you run out; I usually
    save stretching or massaging for last.  Do this every chance you get,
    meaning after every ranking fight.

    The goal here is to get Jeane down to about 10 pounds.  She will then be
    fit enough to flip through the air, inspiring Travis to learn a new move:
    the Step-In Slice attack, which you perform by shaking the nunchuk.  This
    sends Travis flying through the air towards opponents, spinning his katana
    and damaging anyone near him.

    Is it worth it to spend time with Jeane to learn this?  Absolutely.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Bizarre Jelly 5                  [bj5]
----------------------------------------
    Bizarre Jelly is Travis' favorite anime, and he always keeps a copy of
    their video game on hand.  You can play it by selecting the TV in the
    motel.  It's basically a top-down, bullet hell-style shooter.  You have
    five characters to choose from, all with their own stats and shooting
    styles.  There's also three difficulty choices.  Let the title screen sit a
    while to see your high scores.  (Speaking of high scores, Nick sent in this
    tidbit: "If you enter your initials as SEX, the game automatically changes
    your initials to BOY."  Give it a shot.)

    Controls:
           A button: fire
      control stick: move
        plus button: pause

    If you've played shooters or bullet hell games, you know what you're
    getting into.  I don't really know what to say tip-wise.  Keep A held at
    all times and just focus on evading the fire.  Pretty simple, even on Hard.
    Personally, I liked Pure White Glastonberry in the first game better.  It
    required more strategy (if you could call it that) by using special attacks
    along with shooting, and it had much less loli.

    For beating the game on Hard without dying, you can apparently unlock a
    "Special" difficulty which means three lives, special boss, no continues,
    final destination.  For playing the game just once, you get the Pure
    White Lover Bizarre Jerry 5 video.  Oh, Japan.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Side Jobs                        [sjb]
----------------------------------------
    The basic way to earn money in Santa Destroy is in odd jobs.  There are
    eight in all and you unlock them by finishing ranked matches.  All side
    jobs except one are done classic 8-bit style, which is awesome.  Travis
    even blows into a cartridge before playing the game, which is even
    awesomer.  (If you don't understand why then you are too young to be
    playing this game.)  Side jobs are in green on your main map.

    One tip that should hold for most jobs is this: if at any time you feel you
    are on the verge of failure, pause the game with the plus button and
    retire.  You should be able to keep all of the money you earned that way.

    Bug Out
    -------
      Santa Destroy is overrun with bugs!  It's hurting business, so Pizza
      Bat's offering you the job of a lifetime: Hardcore Exterminator!  Chicks
      love bug killers, even more than doctors and pro-athletes.  It's a little
      known fact.

      Exterminate all the bugs in the stage within the time limit.  You can
      suck in blocks if you power up enough.  Giant scorpions cannot be sucked
      in unless you are at full power.

      Controls:
             A button: suck in
             B button: use insecticide
        control stick: move

      Items:
        • green tanks of insecticide
        • yellow tanks that power up your vacuum
        • red tanks that give you an extra life
        • purple pills that cure poison
        • yellow blocks you can suck up and spit out by releasing A
      
      Enemies:
        • Crickets pay Travis no mind and are actually most likely to kill you
          since they change direction sporadically.
        • Mice actually run away from Travis, so try to trap them in a corner.
        • Hornets or bees try to sting Travis; if you get stung, find a purple
          pill.
        • Small red scorpions, I swear they actively seek out Travis since they
          always seem to be right there, following him.
        • Big black scorpions should be knocked out with blocks or insecticide
          before you go after them, full power or not.  When they start to glow
          and spit out a purple glob, run because that is poison even a purple
          pill won't cure.

      Tips:
        Items do not carry over between stages, so use what you can while you
        have it.  Try to position yourself in a doorway or opening where you
        know nothing will sneak up on you.  Hold down A and anything that walks
        in your path will get sucked up.  Once you get the hang of it, the game
        is a piece of cake and is easily one of the best ways to earn some
        cash early in the game.


    Lay the Pipe
    ------------
      Our cheap pizza and televised assassin fights have made Santa Destroy the
      fastest growing city in the world!  But more people means more sewage,
      and our pipes are overflowing.  Do some plumbing, and we'll pay you
      handsomely.  Definitely worth your time, if you don't mind that fecal
      smell.

      Connect the exit to the entrance using pipes within the time limit.  Blue
      pipes can be moved, but not green pipes.  The more pipes you connect, the
      more money you collect.

      Controls:
             A button: lift up/down
             B button: turn
        control stick: move

      Tips:
        Green pipe is always worth more than blue, so the more green, the
        better.  My advice is to find a way to just get the water to the exit;
        you lose all your cash should you screw up a level, and the money is
        better than repeatedly losing trying to get a perfect score.

        For those of you having problems, make sure you work with the flow
        rather than from the exit out.  The water is continually flowing, so
        you need to keep it in the pipes above all else, even if it means
        scrambling for pieces.  Look for sections of green close together, use
        the blue to connect them, and then take a step back and look at the
        rest of the map to find the exit and the best way to get there.  Can be
        challenging, but time is usually on your side.

        For solutions to your pipe problems, check here:
        http://thenumber35.webs.com/walkthroughs/images/nmh2_lay_the_pipe.jpg


    Coconut Grabber
    ---------------
      Kids in the city have forgotten our rich heritage.  They're not
      collecting coconuts!  It's a disaster!  Tradition says you're not a real
      man until you've grabbed your first big, fuzzy coconut.  You've got to be
      a role model for these kids.  You'll do it, right?

      Kick the coconut trees to make the coconuts fall.  Gather as many
      coconuts as you can, and carry them to the goal within the time limit.

      Controls:
             A button: jump
             B button: kick
        control stick: move
             Z button: dash

      Tips:
        You'll quickly see that coconuts do not always fall straight down from
        the tree.  For some, you will need to use the dash or dash and jump to
        catch up to the coconuts.  Once they hit the ground, they are no longer
        able to be picked up.  If they hit Travis in the head, he will be
        stunned and the coconut is as good as lost.  As the levels progress,
        scorpions and bees will hang around the trees to stun Travis.  They
        also make it progressively harder to navigate the level.  Just remember
        that you can kick in midair, and each level has trees whose coconuts
        always fall down straight into your basket, so you should always be
        guaranteed at least four or five coconuts.  Don't be so preoccupied
        with catching them that you run out of time though.


    Pizza with a Vengeance
    ----------------------
      Santa Destroy needs YOU!  Pizza Bat's putting all the family pizzerias
      out of business.  The most beloved of them all, Pizza Suplex, has been a 
      fixture of this town for generations, but now it's about to go bankrupt!
      They need top-notch delivery men to turn things around!

      Deliver the pizzas to all the customers within the time limit.

      Controls:
             A button: accelerate
             B button: brake
             Z button: change gear
        control stick: steer

      Items:
        • small containers of nitro

      Tips:
        A racing game!  Everyone has played one of these in their lifetime or
        they haven't lived.  That said, I don't know what else to say.  Avoid
        cars and oil spills and don't die.  Just like in real driving.  It's a
        little hard to steer when going around corners and using the nitro, so
        don't be afraid to pass up the speed boost it gives or just lay off the
        accelerator.  Don't forget to shift either.  Stay in low gear until you
        hit 130, and then shift into high gear.  You need to go back to low if
        you crash as well.  You can go off-road in the desert (watch for cacti)
        but not in the city.


    Man the Meat
    ------------
      Santa Destroy's being monopolized!  Everywhere you look it's Pizza Bat,
      Pizza Bat, Pizza Bat!  Soon there'll be nowhere to get a juicy T-Bone!
      And now my lead cook got Mad Cow Disease, and butchered my entire kitchen
      staff!  Can you help?

      Continue holding the button to cook the steak.  Cook the steaks the way
      the customers want them.

      Controls:
        A button: fry

      Tips:
        Simply hold A until the steak on the grill matches the color the person
        wants it.  Medium is going to be the hardest, since hitting that middle
        ground is can be difficult.  Just try and get as close you can.  A
        "delicious" compliment is great, but "nice" is better than having a
        fork in your eye, and you need to fill the satisfaction meter at the
        top of the screen to get your pay.

        Stage 2 is going to kick it up a notch by giving you a short glimpse of
        what the customer wants, so try to memorize the color as best you can.
        I've noticed in overcooking the medium steaks that you will hear a tone
        like something burning when you've gone over.  I don't know how that's
        supposed to help you, since there's nothing you can do.  Stage 3 will
        give you an even shorter glimpse at the preferred color.

        EvilPrime has e-mailed in a good strategy to avoid forks in your head
        if you can keep a beat:
        "This requires that you play the minigame with the music up.  Start
        tapping your foot to the beat of the song (quarter notes, 1, 2, 3, 4)
        and it goes like this:

        Level One:
        Rare - Hold down A for 4 beats, and release it as soon as it hits the
               5th beat
        Med  - Hold down A for 11 beats, and release it as soon as it hits 12
        Well - Hold down A for 24 beats, and release it on the second 8th note
               of the 24th beat (if you're counting the beats out loud, let go
               when you say the word four in "twenty four")

        Level Two:
        Rare - Hold down A for 2 beats, and release it on the 3rd beat
        Med  - Hold down A for 8 beats, and release it on the 9th beat
        Well - Hold down A for 16 beats, and release it on the 17th beat

        Level Three:
        Rare - Hold down A for 1 beat, release it on the second beat
        Med  - Hold down A for 6 beats, and release it on the 7th beat
        Well - Hold down A for 12 beats, and release it on the 13th beat

        This should get you perfect pretty much every time.  The most difficult
        ones I find are the Well for lvl 1 and the Rare for lvl 3.  This guide
        isn't 'perfect' but I was able to get perfect scores many times in a
        row using this.  There are sliiight differences in some of them (like
        Well on lvl 1), but you'll find for the most part that this will get
        you no forks in the eye, and 90% 'Delicious', however sometimes you
        will just get a 'Nice'."


    Tile in Style
    -------------
      New construction in Santa Destroy is a lucrative business.  But my best
      tile-layer accidentally fell into a vat of artisan concrete!  You want to
      take over as my tile guy?  It could become your lifelong passion.

      Place all the tiles neatly within the time limit.

      Controls:
             A button: tile select
             B button: rotate
        control stick: move
             Z button: put away selected piece

      Tips:
        Holy crap, I hate this game.  There is only one stage, and you have
        plenty of time to experiment with the tile, but some of these are
        really hard.  Or I'm just slow, which is entirely possible.  The tiles
        are randomized each time you play, so keep coming back and you might
        just get a layout that is easier for you.

        For tile solutions, go here:
        http://thenumber35.webs.com/walkthroughs/images/nmh2_tile_in_style.jpg
        (These are all of the solutions I have come across; no guarantees that
        this is all of them.)


    Getting Trashed
    ---------------
      We cleaned our streets by rocketing all of our garbage into outer space.
      It worked like a charm, but now the trash could fall back to Earth and
      kill us all.  We didn't really think this through.  Will you go into
      space and collect the floating junk?

      Recover all the debris floating in space and store it in your space
      shuttle.  They'll dump it in the ocean or something later.  Use your air
      jet boosters to control your position.  It takes some skills.  If you get
      close to earth's atmosphere, you'll be pulled in by gravity.  So be
      careful because that would suck.

      Controls:
             A button: turn on air jet booster
             B button: release
        control stick: control boost direction

      Tips:
        The only really difficult thing about this game is steering Travis.
        You have to move the control stick in the opposite direction you want
        to go because it controls the boosters, not you.  Asteroids will be
        added to later levels to help impede your progress; they won't kill
        you, just knock you off course.  Don't overuse your boosters and use
        the fact that Travis floats to help get yourself around.  Too much
        boost makes you lose control in a bad way and will cause major trouble
        around stages 3 and 4 when the asteroids get out of control.  The
        asteroids may even knock you into some trash or your shuttle, so just
        go with the flow.

        You can rack up some easy cash by using this tip sent in by an
        anonymous e-mailer: "If you get to the last stage of Getting Trashed,
        grab all the pieces except for one.  Drop it right underneath the goal
        and lose a life.  Float down, grab the last piece of trash and deposit
        it.  Easy ~100k LB."


    Stings So Good
    --------------
      It's this damn assassin craze!  All the tough guys in this city are
      decapitating each other so they can be on TV.  Now we're running out of
      men to do the real work-- like extermination.  Scorpions are everywhere!
      But you look strong enough-- Will you save us from those stinging
      bastards?

      Exterminate the scorpions.  The amount you're paid depends on the total
      weight of the scorpions you've caught.  If stung by a scorpion, get a
      first aid kit to detoxify yourself before the poison spreads through your
      body.

      Controls:
                 A button: pick up a scorpion
        wave the Wii-mote: put the scorpion in your pack
            control stick: move
                    d-pad: control the camera
      Tips:
        This is old school in the No More Heroes sense.  The old scorpion game
        wasn't bad, but this one is brutal.  Angle the camera down so you can
        see the ground.  Try to get near a scorpion, hit A when prompted, and
        flick the Wii-mote to put it away.  Go to the little first aid stands
        to heal if poisoned.  I only see three stands, so it's three strikes
        and you're dead, apparently.  There are five types of scorpions: black,
        blue, red, green, and white with monetary values ascending in that
        order.  I say you're lucky to get a couple and come out alive.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Revenge Missions                 [rvg]
----------------------------------------
    Remember the five guys that killed Bishop?  Your job is to hunt them down
    while you continue your climb to number one.  Revenge missions cycle
    between "kill all enemies within the time limit" and "kill a specific
    target within the time limit".  There are 10 in all, and you can wait and
    do them or start as soon as they're available.  Beef up at the gym or get
    a different katana and come back if you have trouble.

    Be aware that there are chests scattered around the areas you fight in, and
    some contain gifts.  If you're going for 100% gift completion, make sure to
    scout the area before finishing.  Once you finish a revenge mission, you
    cannot redo it.

    Successfully avenge Bishop and you win the "No Jacket" option for Travis'
    outfits.  I don't know why, but for those of you that always wanted Travis
    in just a t-shirt and jeans, there you go.

    Revenge Mission 01
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill all enemies within the time limit.
           Time: 3 minutes

      There is one chest in this mission: it's in the northwest corner of the
      area and it contains a BATTERY.  The enemies here are like what you
      fought at the university before Charlie.  They will come in waves, so
      always keep an eye on your map to see where each wave spawns.  If you are
      running short on time, remember that a running slash will kill the
      smaller enemies outright and leave the bigger ones hurting badly.  You
      should also be good enough at fighting by now to stay hurt-free long
      enough to build up the ecstasy gauge.


    Revenge Mission 02
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill the target within the time limit.
           Time: 5 minutes

      Your target is the dude in the suit with the mean stare and the gun back
      by the bar.  The fact that he has a gun means you should take him out
      ASAP.  Find him easily by looking at your map; he will be indicated by
      the skull icon.  There are three chests, all along the northern side of
      the area: PIZZA, a BATTERY, and the STRAWBERRY GOODS gift.  I actually
      went for them first and this caused the lackeys (mostly big guys) to
      follow me while the target stayed back.  This made it easy to pick him
      out and bum rush him with little interference.  Block his bullets and use
      running slashes to take huge chunks of his life off.  I used Camellia
      MK-III and finished him off with a wrestling move.


    Revenge Mission 03
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill all enemies within the time limit.
           Time: 3 minutes

      Check your map: lots of enemies here and two chests to the north: PIZZA
      and a BATTERY.  There will be two or three guys in this mess with machine
      guns.  Try to target them first if you can.  Use running slashes to take
      out the small guys with knives.  I noticed while doing this mission that
      the slots are inactive, but ecstasy mode works just fine.  Boy, does it
      ever.


    Revenge Mission 04
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill the target within the time limit.
           Time: 5 minutes

      Our target is that bald guy in a suit back by a chest.  The two chests
      to your right are a PIZZA and a BATTERY.  Forget the guys here and run to
      the east side of the area for the NUT & BERRY GOODS and our target.  All
      of those guys will catch up with you.  Try to stay locked on to your
      target as best you can and use all the tricks.  You can dark step around
      bullets, so use that if he starts shooting and you're close enough.  I
      stuck on him enough with Camellia MK-III to finish with a wrestling move
      once again.  If you feel you have time and don't like the idea of being
      surrounded, use the Peony to slice through the big guys.


    Revenge Mission 05
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill all enemies within the time limit.
           Time: 3 minutes

      Just a PIZZA and BATTERY in those chests in the last room.  This one
      might actually be a little too hectic because that last office room has
      some strong enemies in it: guys with samurai swords and bigger dudes with
      beam katanas.  I wouldn't recommend fighting between the desks.  Try and
      get them out in more open space.  They love to use charge attacks, but if
      you've been going to the gym, your health should be able to keep up with
      the onslaught.


    Revenge Mission 06
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill the target within the time limit.
           Time: 5 minutes

      Our target looks like a zombie, damn.  He's in the back of the area by
      all the junk.  There is one chest hidden in the very western corner that
      contains CRANBERRY GOODS.  Focus on as many guys with guns as you can
      since they are a huge pain in the ass on this one.  You should have
      enough time to take them all out, no problem.


    Revenge Mission 07
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill all enemies within the time limit.
           Time: 3 minutes

      The enemies here are all fatties with chainsaws and axes.  Peony is all
      you need.  Their charge attacks mean nothing with this katana.  I think
      there might be a chest in this area, but I cut through these guys so
      quickly, I forgot to note it.  No gifts, at any rate.


    Revenge Mission 08
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill the target within the time limit.
           Time: 5 minutes

      Our target is the snazzy dresser by the back holding a ... cleaver?
      There are three chests, one has a BATTERY, the other has PIZZA, and the
      one behind the junk to the west holds GOOSEBERRY GOODS.  The real threat
      in this mission are the guys with guns.  Take them out and then focus on
      Mr. Fights with Kitchenware.  It's actually really easy when the guns
      are gone.


    Revenge Mission 09
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill all enemies within the time limit.
           Time: 3 minutes

      Hey, look, it's like they copy/pasted the enemies from mission number 7.
      That's code for "break out the Peony".  The two chests here are nothing
      but PIZZA and a BATTERY.


    Revenge Mission 10
    ------------------
      Objective: Kill the target within the time limit.
           Time: 5 minutes

      This punk ass was the only one of the group to speak to Bishop, and he's
      the last one standing.  The four chests contain PIZZA, a BATTERY, an
      ECSTASY MAGAZINE, and BLUEBERRY GOODS.  I highly recommend killing
      everyone before tackling the target.  There's too many guys and a couple
      strong ones in the last room.  If you had all of them crowding you while
      taking on our target (who has a gun), it'd be too hectic.  Rose Nasty is
      fantastic here; the low stance combo tore through the first couple
      enemies like nothing, filling the ecstasy gauge enough for the bigger
      guys.  When it came to the target, one low stance combo swept him off his
      feet, and I was able to impale him when he still had 3/4 of his health
      left.  Bishop's friend is a genius.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//New Game + and Deathmatch        [ngp]
----------------------------------------
    Ah, the New Game +.  Like the first game, loading a completed save file
    gives you the option of choosing a difficulty level (including a new Hard
    mode, Bitter) and then puts you right back at the beginning.  However, you
    start the game with all your equipped items, weapons, techniques, stats,
    clothes, side job stats, and even all your money from your previous file.
    All of your old stuff carries over no matter what difficulty level you
    choose.

    You'll find the E3 trailer for the game on the TV in a New Game +.

    Deathmatch mode is also added to the main menu.  This is basically Boss
    Only mode, with all opponents on Bitter mode strength.  Unfortunately, you
    can't do things like fight New Destroyman as Travis or use Henry to
    slaughter everyone, but this is because boss fights are tailored to
    specific player characters.  It's still enjoyable nonetheless.  There are
    no chests or power-ups in any of these fights (just like in Bitter mode),
    but you can still use the ecstasy Darkside Mode.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


//Miscellaneous                    [mis]
----------------------------------------
    If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, revisions, and all that,
    e-mail me at SophiaLee04 at yahoo dot com, but be sure to put No More
    Heroes 2 in the subject line somewhere.  I may not be very responsive at
    times, but I do read all my mail.

    Version History
    ---------------
      1.06 - 03/22/10: Looots of little updates scattered around.  Lemme see if
                       I can list the big ones: classic controller stuff added,
                       notes on a bug in Airport 51, a gym training note, a tip
                       about switching beam katanas resulting in the ones not
                       being used recharging over time, notes for Skelter
                       Helter and Margarete on Bitter as well as Letz Shake and
                       how not to avoid massive earthquakes, money-making tip
                       for Getting Trashed, and a new BJ5 difficulty you can
                       unlock if you are good at bullet hell games.

      1.05 - 03/15/10: New tip about putting Travis out if he gets caught on
                       fire during the fight with Matt.

      1.04 - 02/22/10: Added a tip sent in about hitting the switches in the
                       bank as Shinobu and the fact that Bishop's friend is
                       none other than Takashi Miike.

      1.03 - 02/15/10: Bitter mode run isn't technically done, but I need to
                       update so here we go.  There are two new strategies for
                       fighting Pizza Batt Man thanks to helpful e-mails, plus
                       one more involving parry attacks that I pulled out of my
                       left ear.  I went crazy playing Tile in Style and Lay
                       the Pipe until I had screenshots of what appear to be
                       all the available solutions (still not 100% sure I have
                       them all for the tile job).  Three new additions under
                       Tips and Tricks as well (parry and two recover moves).

      1.02 - 02/10/10: Added a strategy for Kimmy and a new trick.  I also did
                       some serious proofreading.  Still working on Bitter mode
                       tips and the final solutions for Lay the Pipe and Tile
                       in Style.

      1.01 - 02/08/10: Bitter mode strategy has been added; still working on
                       adding more.  The parry attack has been added under Tips
                       and Tricks.  Solutions for Tile in Style and Lay the
                       Pipe have also been added.  (One solution for Lay the
                       Pipe is missing; I'm working on it and getting any I've
                       missed for Tile in Style as well.)

      1.00 - 02/01/10: Walkthrough submitted, but I am not done yet.  Up next
                       is to tackle Bitter mode and Deathmatch.  I'll also
                       undoubtedly tweak things here and there as I play again.
                       If there's anything you guys want to see added, like a
                       list of all the gifts and their locations or the top ten
                       reasons why Henry is an asshole, let me know and I'll
                       add them.

      0.00 - 01/28/10: Walkthrough started.  I just realized that I started my
                       guide for the first game exactly two years ago (give or
                       take four days).

    Thanks
    ------
      Major thanks to

        • Suda51.  Please never stop making video games.

        • Emily, Jeremy, and Jason for helping supplement the Pizza Batt Man
          strategy.

        • Pavlov for sending in strategy for Kimmy.

        • Sleet Wintergreen for a tip on using ecstasy mode on Ryuji.

        • Jon for tips on hitting the switches in the bank and for cluing me in
          to the fact that Bishop's friend is Takashi Miike.  JiMMaR also gave
          a tidbit for the bank switches.

        • Grent for the tip about rolling on the floor in the Matt fight.

        • Andrew for lots of input.

        • EvilPrime and NecroSpaceMonkey a.k.a. the Real Travis for sidejob
          tips.

        • Nick for a note on BJ5.

        • Jason for notes on the Airport 51 glitch.

        • anonymous e-mailers for helping out.

        • you for reading this guide.

        • all the sites under the next section.

    Hosts
    -----
      The following sites have permission to host this guide, so you should
      only be able to find it on those links.

      GameFAQs, http://www.gamefaqs.com
      Neoseeker, http://www.neoseeker.com
      HonestGamers, http://www.honestgamers.com
      Super Cheats, http://www.supercheats.com
      GamesRadar, http://www.gamesradar.com
      http://thenumber35.webs.com
      MMGM Wii, http://wii.mmgn.com

    Legal Stuff
    -----------
      This walkthrough is meant purely for personal and private use.  Please do
      not redistribute it for commercial purposes, alter it, or do anything
      with it that the little voice in your head tells you not to do but you're
      tempted to do the opposite because what does that little voice know
      anyway?  It probably doesn't even exist; what right does it have to tell
      you how to live your life?  But you should listen to it this once.

    Copyright (©) 2010 Georgi Samaras
(0.1533/d/web8)