As it stands, the 7th generation console war is still ongoing.  Though it would be unfair to place all three popular consoles side to side for a comparison, many continue to do so for reasons completely lost upon me.  It certainly doesn't help that countless so-called market analysts continue comparing Microsoft's Xbox 360, Sony's PlayStation 3, and the well-received Nintendo Wii in their seemingly weekly articles, poorly predicting the next big thing in video gaming.

If you ask me, it's pretty much all moot.  Analysts get paid for spouting nonsense, fanboys get off on being obnoxious, and the rest of us just try to get by with our console(s) of choice.

But in the spirit of fun, let's take a look at these three contenders in this alleged war.  If you're thinking of making a purchase and have to choose, how can you be sure you're making the right choice?  A console can say a lot about who you are, acting as a gaming machine and status symbol (much like a car), and you certainly don't want to convey the wrong message.  This is where I step in to guide you on your journey.

Xbox 360

Microsoft launched its successor to the original Xbox back in November 2005.  Its sleek design was a vast improvement over a bulky predecessor that was big enough to club a moose with.  The 360 also adopted a new color theme -- white and green.  With several price drops and different models under its belt, the 360 is now one of the cheaper consoles out there but carries an unfortunate reputation involving a red ring, usually caused by overheating problems within the machine.  Since the Red Ring of Death began plaguing early generation models, Microsoft has literally tossed billions out the window providing warranties to address the 360's issues (which extended beyond the RRoD).  Thankfully, the company has drastically reduced these problems in newer units currently on the market.

Xbox LIVE is the 360's community service and includes the Xbox LIVE Marketplace; another notable feature is the ability to sync your 360 with your PC or Zune, compliments of Microsoft.

Having been around longer than the PlayStation 3 and Wii, the Xbox LIVE community is much larger than its competitors, and the wider array of games to offer.  That being said, the Xbox 360 also tends to inspire the image of a roudy fraternity punk humping a beer bong because of its many FPS exclusives, the most popular being Halo.

Antithesis: weeaboos, Asians

PlayStation 3

Sony's PlayStation 3 is usually seen as the Xbox 360's biggest rival, both being advertised as next generation and sharing many of the same games.  It's officially marketed in CAPS as PLAYSTATION 3 because...  Well, we're not sure why, but a lot of PS3-related trademarks are written that way, such as the licensed SIXAXIS.  Unexplained love affair with CAPS LOCK aside, the Sixaxis Wireless Controller looks just like the PS2 controller, but sports a motion detector on top of the DUALSHOCK 3 feature.  Sony's answer to Xbox LIVE is the PlayStation Network, or PSN, a free service that has been around longer than LIVE but received little attention up until these past couple of years.  PS3 owners are still eagerly awaiting the highly hyped and anticipated PlayStation Home, which is expected to offer much of what the LIVE Dashboard currently has (if not more).

While early PS3s suffered errors and heating issues of their own, Sony has since begun replacing problematic units for disgruntled owners.  Its Blu-Ray unit has been known to burn out even in the high end 80GB model.

The PS3 is by far the most expensive of the three consoles but can also be considered a rather cheap Blu-Ray player.  As such, many consumers who wouldn't consider themselves gamers have settled for one of these shiny behemoths.  Indeed, even Sony sees their product as more of a multimedia machine, capable of much more than just gaming.  Those who fancy themselves media- or HiDef-philes are often drawn to the PS3.  Hence forth, PS3 archetypes are typically more sophistocated than the 360 stereotype, though everyone winds up sounding like an idiot when they get into fanboy forum fights.  They can also be quite sensitive, quick to jump to their console's defense at any given opportunity.

Antithesis: poor folk, anyone without an impressive home theatre, Final Fantasy fanatics (oh wait-...)

Wii

Aside from having the most unassuming name, Nintendo's toy console has been enjoying the most success out of these three.  Since its release in November 2006 (a few days after the PS3), the Wii has sold nearly 30 million units as of July 2008, putting it well ahead of its competitors.  At this point, only the low end 360 Arcade can compete in terms of price.  That being said, the Wii is also viewed as a light weight, with its target demographic being the new casual gamer group that encompasses just about anyone with motor skills and hand-eye coordination.  The Wii's design is simple, with a pleasant white and blue color scheme.

Early on, Wii owners claimed the Wii Remote was a hazard after incidents of "strap failure" that resulted in property damage and bodily injury.  Since then, Nintendo has replaced the wrist straps for such mentally challenged (we're not allowed to use the r-word) players.  Staying true to Nintendo tradition, the Wii does require peripherals for many of its games, with the Nunchuk being a must-have.

Gamers have been complaining about Nintendo's target audience, claiming that the company has forgotten about the hardcore fans who have remained loyal by choosing the Wii over other consoles.  Another common belief is that the Wii's third party games are generally subpar; as such, passionate gamers might want to take a second look at the Wii's inventory before investing in one.  Graphically, it cannot compare to the Xbox 360 or PS3, but the Wii maintains its own unique appeal with that Nintendo charm.

Antithesis: people who hate cute and colors 

Here's a disclaimer for anyone who may be tempted to take this more seriously than intended: I do own an Xbox 360, and I don't personally consider PS3 owners to be any more educated than the next -- PC gamers tend to claim that prestige for themselves.