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Sunday Special: Female Gamers
Lydia Sung - Sunday, August 10th, 2008 | 2:19PM (PT)


Who are we? WHAT are we?

Poster for Xbox GamerchiX, a LIVE community several thousands strong.

Ask any gamer of the typical variety (male between 18-34) how he handles female gamers, and he'll probably tell you it's all the same to him.  He'll take her down just like anyone else.  He might also say that there are no female gamers, that the entire demographic is simply a lie concocted by the CIA or women's rights organizations to establish equality in their holy virtual sanctums of frags, headshots, experience points, and the word "breasts" are called by any other name but that (you know what I mean). 

To be fair, the male portion of the gaming population is diverse, as I've come to learn.  To some of them, it really doesn't matter that we don't have the same reproductive organs, but I have never once encountered or even heard of gamers who act like gentlemen around the fairer sex while duking it out with their controllers and keyboards.  One might argue that true equality dictates against such kinder, favorable treatement (e.g., going easy on someone because she's a girl or woman), but then how do you justify the complete opposite behavior on that equality spectrum -- the sort of behavior that's driven most female gamers to keep their mouths shut or spam the mute option.

Now for the neanderthals out there, let's go over a few things:

1.  Yes, I am really a girl, for those of you who have to ask.
2.  We're looking for a group, not a boyfriend, so next time you find out the priest or dps is a lady, and a female voice pops up in team chat or on Ventrilo, please back off. 
3.  No, we do not have hot friends who would be interested.

4.  Just because your girlfriend finds you endearing doesn't mean we do too.  Of course, this only applies to those who have, by some miracle of God, snagged a woman of their own.  In real life.

5.  Asking us if we're hot won't always warrant a response.  It's not that we're ugly; we just know what most gamer guys look like, and it scares us a little.

6.  Most women don't obsess over our genitalia, so we probably don't care about yours, how big it is, or what it can do.

7.  Sometimes we talk about menstruation just to freak you guys out.

8.  We haven't seen it before, but we don't really care about your car as much as you think we do.

9.  "Make me a sandwich!"  No, go make your own!

10.  Pix plz!  You first.

 

For those who have never seen real ones.

A little flirting may be tolerated or welcomed depending on the individual.  Hell, it's actually pretty funny watching some of you get so worked up over little ol' us.  But most of you don't know where that fine line is or how to detect polite rejection and until you learn, it may be safer to keep things civil and clean.

Now I'm aware men (or boys) don't often treat each other with respect either.  When someone tells them that they should treat women gamers with respect, they may snort indignantly and say that the fairer sex should learn to tough it out, to put up or shut up.  Well, as Sam Cotts of Gamertell once said:

We could suggest that the fairer sex toughen up, learn to take their lumps along with the rest of us. But what a loss that would be. Right now the online environment for console gamers resembles the house you used to rent with your buddies back in college, the one where every room stank of feet, balls, and stale urine. We could use a little class gentleman.

That being said, I would like to end this Sunday Special crash course with another visual example. 

Girls like her do not speak for the rest of us.

Note that most of us will not strip our clothes and dignity to pose with our boyfriend's vintage consoles and collector edition FPS games.  We do not lick our controllers like phallic idols (that's just unsanitary).  We don't care if you curb stomp us into the ground as long as you don't throw a tantrum when we return the favor.

Oh, and that Blood Elf whom you consider homoerotic?  Hello, female gamers need eye candy too, and we'd choose to do him (seriously, go look at the fanart out there) over you!  Though I'm really more partial to Trolls myself.  What can I say, it's the tusks.

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Comments:

August 10th, 2008 5:26PM(PT)
lord monkey
I LOVE this article, nice job Lydia. Im quite partial to the boobs picture saying "Yes, we have those, only smaller".

Yes, I guess female gamers do get the bad end of the gamers universe sometimes. Reminds me of way back when I was playing Tony Hawks Underground 2 online. There would be rooms titled "B00BS Plz!" and guys always asking "a/s/l's" to anyone that gave a slight hint that they had a vagina. God I hated those guys.
August 10th, 2008 5:53PM(PT)
OmegaFury
Who says breasts??

Hey. I recognize the picture at the top- it's a revamped pic. of Rosy the Riveter, an advertisement that encouraged women to help in the war effort and to show that their effort is as important as men. It was really *bleep*ed up what happened afterwards- men started demanding that women quit their jobs and that they should go back to working in the house. That really shows how much their effort was valued >.>

Okay, back to the main subject... or sorta, kinda. This article reminds me of a funny story about a prank that my friend pulled on some dude on Live. My friend's profile had "I'm So Pretty" in the title, along with a profile pic. of a girl. Okay, so he 's playing online, and starts talking to this dude in a very girlish voice and starts to "flirt" with him. After the match, he adds the dude to his friend's list (and course the guy accepts). After that, they talk on private chat, and after awhile, my friend changes his voice into a very deep voice and yells, "WHY THE *bleep* ARE YOU SWEET TALKING WITH MY WOMAN??!!??" The dude was so freaked out that he exited the chat, and immediately deleted my friend from his friend's list. Ah. Reminiscing is fun.
August 10th, 2008 6:08PM(PT)
RabidChinaGirl
@ lord monkey
Glad you like the Ivy picture.

@ OmegaFury
That's pretty flippin' hilarious, actually. When I used to play Darkness online a lot with a college buddy, he'd pretend to be 15, and I was his mother (voice is on the deeper side, so I can pull it off). Then one time in a deathmatch with this other guy, we were helping him out by teaching him the mechanics of the game.

My friend was the one doing the helping, and I never actually said anything to the guy specifically. In the end, the dude added me as a friend on LIVE, and not my guy-friend. We laughed that he must've liked MILFs.
August 10th, 2008 7:22PM(PT)
Gussimotto
I've met girls online before, I usually try to act civilized, while my friends are in the background saying "OH MAN TELL HER TO MAKE A SANDWICH" and "booobiesssss........". I always give respect to girls weather or not I'm trying to kill them. Although teabagging them is often hilarious, I really don't mean any harm. The only thing female gamers that I don't like, are the ones that try to capitalize on the fact that they play video games; the so-called "girl gamers" that I've seen in articles in magazines wearing skimpy clothing and showing off their assets. Sure sex sells, but you don't see any "guy gamers" without shirts on capitalizing on this whole "gamer" obsession.

Anyways, I enjoyed your article. It was entertaining because its stuff I've experienced first hand / believe in. It just connected .
August 10th, 2008 7:33PM(PT)
arkangyl
I agree that guys need to treat you ladies with respect more. It may be considered cheauvinist these days, but I still hold doors for girls, and I still don't swear in front of them. Just my opinion. As far as gaming is concerned, I've met a couple girls that kicked tail at Halo. Overall, I haven't met many hardcore gamer chicks, yet. My gf is a book person, not a gamer... Oh well, I still love her.
August 10th, 2008 7:41PM(PT)
x_revenge
i've met some (that told me they're girls), really makes no difference, i generally don't act like a jerk, except if i'm really, really annoyed by someone
August 10th, 2008 7:48PM(PT)
riiaku
I used to have a screenname that was "iron_myshirt_beetch" yeah women didnt like it. lol j/k. Its cool that chicks play video games, 2 of my female friends play video games and they are girly girl hotties and nice to know that more of their types are joining the gamer ranks. Comforting.
August 10th, 2008 7:54PM(PT)
arkangyl
Why was the Epic Fail pic just changed? I got a 404 on this page, and when it reappeared, the pic was different...
August 10th, 2008 7:57PM(PT)
RabidChinaGirl
@ arkangyl
Purely aesthetic reasons, ark, sorry about the brief confusion.
August 10th, 2008 8:03PM(PT)
arkangyl
No prob. Couldn't see her face before. Not that I'm attracted. She's too skinny for my tastes.
August 10th, 2008 8:12PM(PT)
Azuma
I think girls playing games is normal. One of my best friends is a girl and always kicks my butt online. Though I do kinda look down on people who say they try to act civilised. You should always act civil no matter who it is.
August 10th, 2008 8:18PM(PT)
arkangyl
quote Azuma
Though I do kinda look down on people who say they try to act civilised. You should always act civil no matter who it is.
I agree. I do try. I just let a few more yo mama jokes slip when with my guy friends.
August 10th, 2008 10:32PM(PT)
SillyPuddee
Have a guy member of the neoseeker staff write an article about guy gamers. I want a sunday special too!

Also, no girls on the internet.
August 10th, 2008 10:40PM(PT)
Invidia
The "Epic Fail" picture scares me!!! =(

Extreme behavior towards the female sex is annoying and detestable.

Harmless flirting that doesn't cross the line? Fine, every once in a blue moon. As was said, it can be kind of funny. I regularly flirt with the guys to make them feel uncomfortable >D!

Not going easy, but at the same time, not freaking out if you do lose or win = great. You don't have to go easy on them (Or how would they or any newb be able to learn more about the game), but don't be a douche about winning or losing.

"Golden Mean" everyone -- learn it and apply it.
August 11th, 2008 12:48AM(PT)
DeathMonkey
"Though I'm really more partial to Trolls myself."

At last! Someone else who sees the coolness of trolls!

Also I treat girls like I treat everyone else online, which is with respect until they get on my nerves. It's a shame the arses out there have to make us all seem bad =/
August 11th, 2008 9:43AM(PT)
tekmosis
@OmegaFury
lolol

amusing post, Lydia. Interesting article photos as well. Kevin will be most amused by them
August 11th, 2008 10:16AM(PT)
kspiess
Amused..! Great article.
August 11th, 2008 10:31AM(PT)
kik36
I think it's more of a nature thing to be honest. As soon as a woman enters the room the men immediately puff up their chest and act like assholes to get their attention.....it's been going on for thousands of years. And the bigger the asshole, the hotter the girl.

August 11th, 2008 1:13PM(PT)
RabidChinaGirl
@ tekmosis
Kevin is always easily amused.

@ kspiess
I rest my case. Glad you guys liked it. And quit trying to edit out the text on that image, Kev; yeah, you know the one I mean. Perv xP
August 11th, 2008 3:22PM(PT)
kspiess
Someone say something? I was distracted by.. something.
August 11th, 2008 3:55PM(PT)
mega digirod
I used to think anyone who said things like "THERE ARE NO GIRLS ON THE INTERNET" was joking.

Now I know that's not always the case. Boy, was I naive.

*Strokes Chin.* Hmmmm. I think I might use that picture as a spray in TF2.
August 12th, 2008 1:45AM(PT)
mb 1
ya its ridiculous. don't have to go easy on us just dont talk shit or kick us from a game or call us b***h when we beat your ass just because we don't have a dick.

"respect " thats all we ask for. too bad alot of people don't even know the meaning of the word
August 12th, 2008 2:50AM(PT)
Azuma
quote RabidChinaGirl
And quit trying to edit out the text on that image, Kev; yeah, you know the one I mean. Perv xP
So does that go for all of us? J/K

But one thing bothers me bout the article. That is number 4 on your list. Does that go for everybody or just the assholes?
August 12th, 2008 12:56PM(PT)
RabidChinaGirl
quote Azuma
But one thing bothers me bout the article. That is number 4 on your list. Does that go for everybody or just the assholes?
Can anything be applied to everybody?
August 20th, 2008 12:56PM(PT)
Galacticdramon
It's intriguing, that bit about being gentlemen in games. What are we supposed to do? Be the first to a door so it automatically opens?
August 20th, 2008 2:05PM(PT)
RabidChinaGirl
quote Galacticdramon
What are we supposed to do? Be the first to a door so it automatically opens?
Haha, I didn't think of that! It'd be pretty hilarious to actually see happen.
September 2nd, 2008 3:56AM(PT)
MrGrimm
Oh wow. This reminds me of the most uncivilized female gamer EVER. She played a game called, 'Ratchet and Clank, Up Your Arsenal'. Every day, she would be playing the whole, 'Oo, you got beat by a girl!' thing. And then goes on to, well, being a 12 year old boy and just gets plain rude. Doing things like kicking people from games, cussing people out, making cheap taunts...

In any consolation, I think there is NEVER a reason to be rude EVER. Just because it's a guy, doesn't mean I can go up to his face and just be a big a-hole. I dunno, that's just me. -_-

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