Rogers, Canada's only GSM provider, just released their plan pricing for the iPhone 3G. I'm going to cut right through to what matters:

July 11th is not going to mark the shift in mentality of the Canadian cellular industry as we all had hoped. AT&T set a benchmark with the release of the original iPhone when they offered unlimited data access for $20/month, and when it was announced that Canada would be getting the iPhone 3G via Rogers/Fido, we all crossed our fingers hoping that we'd see something similar happen over on our side of the border.

Let's see what went wrong ...

According to Rogers' cheapest iPhone 3G plan, $60 a month gets you 150 minutes, unlimited evenings and weekends, visual voicemail, some text messages, and ... 400 MB of data. And that's not including Call Display or the bogus "System Access Fee". Minimum contract length? 3 years.

I had a fleeting hope that maybe the iPhone launch in Canada would finally be the day that we got some 2008-era data pricing, but 400 MB for $60/month? It looks like Canada's cellular industry is destined to remain in the Dark Ages for a while longer.

However, let's be fair and look at the offerings in a little more detail:

Have you had a minute to process that? Good. Let's break down the cheapest plan:

• $60/month + $6.95 bogus System Access Fee + tax = $75/month minimum
• 150 minutes, per-minute billing, $0.35/minute additional minutes
• Unlimited evenings start at 9 PM + weekends
• They're actually advertising 75 sent text messages? We're farther back in the Dark Ages than I previously believed.
• Visual Voicemail (voicemail is only vaguely useful for most)
• 400 MB of data, $0.50/MB for the first 60 MB, $0.03/MB thereafter
• NO network calling (ie. Rogers-to-Rogers free-of-charge)
• NO incoming call provisions
• NO call display

Now, I don't know about anyone else, but to me, voicemail is useless, while call display I can't live without. It's another $15 a month on top of the $75 if you want call display (as part of the value pack; it remains to be seen whether Rogers will offer the $7 stand-alone option).

Essentially you have 150 minutes a month, and unless you're talking on your phone between 9 PM - 7 AM on weekdays or on the weekends, those minutes are counting down one minute at a time (the accounting department at Rogers loves rounding up!) whether you received the call or dialed it, and regardless of whether the other party is on the same network.

If this was the industry standard here in Canada, then I would just shrug and move along, but here's what Rogers themselves offer with a few of their other plans:

Mega Time 30

• $30/month ($41/month after SAF + taxes)
• 200 weekday minutes (with a 3-year contract as with the iPhone)
• Unlimited 9 PM evenings + weekends
• UNLIMITED NETWORK CALLING

Mega Time 40

• $40/month ($53/month after SAF + taxes)
• 350 weekday minutes (with a 3-year contract as with the iPhone)
• Same as above

The also offer very similar plans ("Mega Incoming 30/40") for the same prices but with unlimited network calling swapped out for unlimited incoming minutes.

Let's just use the "Mega Time 30" plan as a baseline, and compare it to their basic iPhone 3G plan -- for the ADDITIONAL $34/month ($75 - $41) you get:

• 50 LESS minutes per month
• Network calling taken away
• 75 text messages (wowaweewa!)
• Visual voicemail
• 400 MB of data

Uh-oh. Putting things into perspective suddenly makes a "so-so" offering look plain awful. In my opinion the 50 less minutes per month cancel out the 75 text messages and voicemail, and that leaves us with the SUBTRACTION of network calling (a hugely minute-saving feature) and 400 MB of data for $34/month.

What if we were to subtract the "Unlimited network calling" feature from the "Mega Time 30" plan to see exactly how much the 400 MB of data is costing us? Well, that's hard to do because Rogers' web site is convoluted and doesn't actually want to tell me how much this feature costs. However, since Fido == Rogers and Rogers == Fido, let's take Fido's "Fido-to-Fido" option which gives you unlimited network calling AND text messaging to other Fido customers for $10/month, and assume that the first portion alone would cost about $5/month if Rogers were to offer it. Finally, this leaves us with $29/month for 400 MB of data, or about $1.00 for 14 MB.

Let me repeat that: The entire Rogers iPhone 3G plan essentially boils down to ~$30/month for 400 MB of data. They can spin it any other way, but that's that -- and they know it.

What happens if you go over the 400 MB? That price shoots up to $0.50 for 1 MB, up to 60 MB ($30). After that it's $0.03/MB. Rats. Compare and contrast this to AT&T in the U.S. offering unlimited data for $30 USD/month.

"Moving icebergs" is how I would describe attempting to modernize the Canadian cellular industry. The iPhone 3G plan just inched things along a bit, but everyone's expectations just fell flat on their faces anyway, especially in light of AT&T's benchmark.

Rogers should feel ashamed for single-handedly destroying the best chance Canada had of emerging from the Dark Ages of the cellular industry. This is suit-and-tie highway robbery at its finest.

Just for kicks, let's see how much it would cost me personally to get the same functionality + 400 MB of data with Rogers' iPhone 3G plan as compared to my current plan (which I'm using on an iPhone anyway). My plan with Fido right now:

• 150 daytime minutes
• Unlimited E/W starting at 6 PM
• Unlimited incoming calls
• Unlimited Fido-to-Fido calling + texting
• Call display
• $35/month after S.A.F. + taxes

If I wanted the unlimited network calling, incoming calls, and call display options on the basic iPhone plan, I'd have to shell out an additional ~$15 (estimated network calling + incoming calls options based on Fido's prices) + $15 for call display. That's $30 on top of $60, or $108/month after S.A.F. + taxes. Honestly?

So for me personally, I would essentially be paying an additional $73/month so that I could get a measly 400 MB of data, while losing out 3 hours of "evening" calling. Wow.

I think I'll just stick with my current iPhone and the occasional WiFi connection I find. Thanks, Rogers, for maintaining such an iron grip on GSM service in Canada. I can't wait until the Canadian government kicks you out of bed, and invites a hotter, younger cousin in.