Bow chika bow chika bow wow~
A co-worker recently posted a list of the top 25 hottest females in games, and while I am not personally opposed to this, I have to say one thing: overrated.
How many top (insert number here) game-girls have we seen since the dawn of meticulously rendered jello-breasts? Too many, I say.
Which is why this gaming woman has taken it upon herself to compile a list from the other side of the chromosome pool. Enlisting the aid of a few other gamer girls and Google, we bring you a Neoseeker exclusive - the top 25 hottest men in video games.
Disclaimer: Do not judge us, for we do not judge you. But feel free to laugh a little.
25. Sol Badguy (Guilty Gear)
24. Hwoarang (Tekken)
23. Iori Yagami (King of Fighters)
22. Mitsuhide Akechi (Samurai Warriors)
21. Raphael Sorel (Soul Calibur)
20. Vega (Street Fighter)
19. Kratos (God of War)
18. Squall Leonhart (Final Fantasy VIII)
17. Cloud Strife (Final Fantasy VII)
16. Atton Rand (Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords)
15. Raziel (Legacy of Kain)
14. Sir Auron (Final Fantasy X)
13. Leon S. Kennedy (Resident Evil 4)
12. Sydney Losstarot (Vagrant Story)
11. Balthier (Final Fantasy XII)
10. Altaïr Ibn La-Ahad (Assassin's Creed)
9. Pyramid Head (Silent Hill 2)
8. Alucard (Castlevania)
7. Siegfried Schtauffen (Soul Calibur)
6. Henry Townshend (Silent Hill 4)
5. Vincent Valentine (Final Fantasy VII)
4. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy VII)
3. Dante (Devil May Cry)
2. Link (Legend of Zelda)
1. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid)
Now I don't agree with all of these choices, but I guess that's what makes it fair - a lot of the selections above actually make me cringe. I tried to balance it out by rigging the list slightly, but let's pretend it's completely unbiased.
As it turns out, Snake is no stranger to the ladies. Got that, gentlemen? So next time you plan on impressing your woman on Valentine's Day, buy her a nice bouquet of flowers and sneak up on her in a cardboard box. Or give her a really, really big gun - no, the one in your pants will not suffice so please put that away before you hurt someone.
Need a fool proof present? Dress up as a ninja.
Honorable mentions, those being my personal favorites who would have made the list had it been based solely on personal opinion, include:
- Bao-Dur (Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords) *this guy doesn't get enough love
- Kael'thas Sunstrider (Warcraft 3)
- The Spy (Team Fortress 2) *because backstabbing is hot
- Kain Highwind (Final Fantasy IV)
- Ryu Hayabusa (Ninja Gaiden)
- Naoe Kanetsugu (Samurai Warriors)
- Lieutenant Minh Young Kim (Gears of War) *rest in peace
- Master Chief (Halo)