| February 10th, 2004 |
| November 18th, 2008 7:22AM |
Member Stats
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| Real Name: | gamer 101 |
| Email: | private |
| MSN: | private |
| Xbox GamerTag: | O Seeker |
| Location: | Bumsville, I  |
| Occupation: | Boss' Bummer |
| Age: | 0 |
| Gender: | N/A |
| Homepage: | The great Derren Brown |
| Platforms Owned |
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| Interests: |
| Being member No. 112519 of Neoseeker.^_^ |
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| Biography: |
Lets me tell you a story of 3 very important corporate lessons that will get you through this shithole that you called LIFE.
Lesson 1 : A crow was sitting on top of a tree. A rabbit passed by and ask, 'Can I sit like you and doing nothing all day long?', 'Sure, why not?' the crow said. So the rabbit sit on the ground below and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox stroll by, found the rabbit and ate it.
So, corporate lesson 1 : To be sit around, doing nothing, you need to sit very, very high up.
Lesson 2: A turkey was chatting with a bull.
'I wish I can get on top of that tree, but I just dont have the energy.', sighed the turkey.
'well, why dont you nibble on some of my dropping, they're packed with nutrients'
So, the turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating more dung, he reached the second branch. And finally, after a forthnight, he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
...Soon, he was spotted by a farmer.
Who promptly shot the turkey off the tree.
So, hence the second corporate lesson :
Bullshit might get you to the top. But it wont keep you there.
Lesson 3: A little bird was flying south for the winter.
It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field.
While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realise how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing by cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and prompty dug him out and......ate him!
So, came the final corporate lesson:
1, NOT everyone who drop shit on you is your enemy.
2, NOT everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3, and for god sake, when you're in deep shit. KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.
ALSO....
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELLPHONE COULD DO...
There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies.
Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for
survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: -
*EMERGENCY*
*I*
* The Emergency Number worldwide for **Mobile** is 112 .* If you find
yourself out of coverage area of your mobile network and there is an
emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to
establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112
can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. **Try it out.**
*II*
* Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does you car have remote
keys?*
This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone:
If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call
someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone.
Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person
at your home press the unlock button, holding it near the mobile phone on
their end. Your car will unlock. Saves someone from having to drive your
keys to you. Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away,
and if you can reach someone who has the other "remote" for your car, you
can unlock the doors (or the trunk).
Editor's Note: *It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car
over a cell phone!"*
*III*
Subject: Hidden Battery power
Imagine your cell battery is very low, you are expecting an important call
and you don't have a charger. Nokia instrument comes with a reserve
battery. To activate, press the keys *3370# Your cell will restart with
this reserve and the instrument will show a 50% increase in battery. This
reserve will get charged when you charge your cell next time.
AND
*IV*
How to disable a STOLEN mobile phone?
To check your Mobile phone's serial number, key in the following digits on
your phone:
* # 0 6 #
A 15 digit code will appear on the screen. This number is unique to your
handset. Write it down and keep it somewhere safe. when your phone ge ts
stolen, you can phone your service provider and give them this code. They
will then be able to block your handset so even if the thief changes the
SIM card, your phone will be totally useless.
You probably won't get your phone back, but at least you know that whoever
stole it can't use/sell it either.
If everybody does this, there would be no point in people stealing mobile phones. |
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