| January 21st, 2007 |
| September 8th, 2008 6:01AM |
Member Stats
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| Real Name: | private |
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| Location: | unknown  |
| Occupation: | private |
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| I can't wait until the day I never have to see your face ever again ~ |
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| Biography: |
What defines a self? How many times have you sat there questioning over and over again “Who am I?” All of us have. So few of us have managed to answer those questions monotonously playing over in our heads. And those answers are usually incorrect anyway. Do we know what we want to be? Do we know our calling? So how many of us actually know who we are, or what we are for that matter?
Experience. Experiences shape us. When we’re born, in most cases, we’re gifted with the right of choice. We’re a slate of clean, shimmering marble, on which anything can stain, and anything can engrave. “Who am I?” isn’t the question, it’s “Who am I not?”
We know what we’re not, and we know what we want to be.
The day your friend died in a collision right in front of your eyes, you learnt not to see life without appreciating the gift we’re given – You were no longer unappreciative. When your closest friend nearly lost her life at your direct intervention, you learnt not to procrastinate with the little things, for something big may become of it – You were no longer irresponsible. And when you saw her laying there, tubes and machines all around, you learnt to smile even when all you wanted to do was cry – You were no longer weak. When you were diagnosed with a physically burdening and potentially lethal hereditary disease, you learnt not to feel down at what you could no longer do and what had to be given up, but to treasure what you still can – You were no longer pessimistic. When you see your closest friends leave for foreign lands, you learnt that the times you shared, through smiles, laughter, and tears, the times you may not have appreciated as much as you would now, that those times may never happen again – You were no longer apathetic. When a dear friend of yours betrayed you, you learnt never to let another dear friend betray herself again – You were no longer selfish. When your parents fought, you learnt not to be the catalyst – You were no longer immature. And when you parents left each other, you learnt not to make that mistake yourself someday – You were no longer lost, you had found a goal in life.
When you see a smile like that, one that makes the cold melt away - You're no longer a machine, you have feelings.
You’re not what you were made by. You’re not a psychotic old man with a taste for violence even at those you love. And you’re not manipulative in that you purposely attempt to anger the most dangerous. You’re nothing like that, you’re what you make of yourself.
You know you’re appreciative, that you try your best, that you’re your experiences. You’ll always end up perfect, because you’ll make yourself what you want to be, you’ll be your own self-image. If you don’t like what you want to make yourself, it’s then when asking yourself the question “Who am I?” is truly justified. And you’ll never be perfect.
If I could give anyone advice, it would be to take those hard lessons harder, and to appreciate all the time that you have to learn these lessons. Appreciate the tears, the gritting teeth, however you may suffer. Because it’s these few times that make you a better person through realising what went wrong.
Who am I? Who am I not? I ask myself… but do I find an answer?
When you meet somebody so special, the very words of who heal you of what you used to be… You’ve found your calling. You’ve found who you want to be. And thus, we know who we are.
I know who I am. I know who I will be.
I’m waiting to bloom. Until then, I’ll be counting the times my heart skips beats, so that I’ll know exactly what to double in return.
[Featured Music Video]
I Am Hated
The world is my enemy – And I’m a walking target
Two times the devil with all the significance
Dragged and raped for the love of a mob
I can’t stay – Because I can’t be stopped
Eat mother*bleep*ers alive who cross us
I know you’re all tired of the same old bosses
Let me tell you how it’s going to be
I’m going to kill anyone who steps up in front of me
Welcome to the same old *bleep*ing scam
Same old shit in a dead fad
Everybody wants to be so hard
Are you real or a second rate sports card?
They all lost their dad or their wife just died
They never got to go outside
Shut up, nobody gives a *bleep*
It doesn’t change the fact that you suck
We are the anticancer – We are the only answer
Stripped down, we want you dead – But what’s inside of me, you’ll never know
We are bipolar Gods – We are, you know what we are
My life was always shit, and I don’t think I need this anymore
Now I’m not pretty and I’m not cool
But I’m fat and I’m ugly and proud – So *bleep* you
Standing out is my new pretension
Streamline the sickness, half-assed aggression
You got to see it to believe it, we all got conned
All the mediocre sacred cows we spawn
Put your trust in the mission
We will not repent – This is our religion
We are the anticancer – We are the only answer
Stripped down, we want you dead – But what’s inside of me, you’ll never know
We are bipolar Gods – We are, you know what we are
My life was always shit, and I don’t think I need this anymore
I am hated
You are hated
We are hated
Everything sucks and I can prove it
Everybody dies, shuffle on, remove it
Individuals, indispensable
I’m the paradox deity vessel
The other side holds no secret
But this side is done, I don’t need it
Before you go, you should know you’re breaking down
You’ll be rotten by the time you’re underground
...*bleep* you...
We are the anticancer – We are the only answer
Stripped down, we want you dead – But what’s inside of me, you’ll never know
We are bipolar Gods – We are, you know what we are
My life was always shit, and I don’t think I need this anymore
We are the source of conscience – We are distorted sentience
There’s only one thing left and I can’t leave until it’s sated
We are the absolute – We are controlling you
They’re closing in, I can’t escape
I am hated
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| I beg you burn me away ~ |
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