Saevus

I've always been different. I wasn't like every other kid who dreams about being an astronaut. I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere is a real hero of mine. Sting would be another person who is a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it... I respect that. Often times I stay up late at night and muse to myself, "What if Madonna had it right all along? What if God was one of us..?" I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what brand of clothing I'm wearing? Yes. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot.

Flavors of the month:

04/09

Rogue Dead Guy Ale - The apex of the vortex of ale engineering. 5/5

Budweiser American Ale - Surprisingly a very quality ale coming from Budweiser. Highly recommended! 5/5

Lagunitas Hop Stoopid Ale - It has some delicious pine undertones but is pretty lacking as far as the Lagunitas name concerns. 3/5

Arrogant Bastard Ale - Strikingly delicious, however consume after your meal. Because as advertised this shit will destroy your palette. 5/5

Sapporo - A Japanese beer imported from Canada, it comes in a snazzy 22 oz. can but contains an uninteresting beer. Best stick to Hello Kitty and leave this to the pros. 1/5

Alaskan Summer Kölsch-Style Ale - A warm bronze taste definitely gives this brew a summmer flair. A solid addition to the Alaskan line. 4/5

Rogue Northwestern Ale - Tastes a lot like Dead Guy, but if one is good more is certainly better. 5/5

Coors Light - This is my girlfriend's beer that I always end up drinking after all of my drinks have been spent. I don't like it but it's always there. Reminds me of a good joke: What's the difference between Coors Light and two people *bleep*ing in a canoe? They're both very close to water. 2/5 (bonus point for omnipresence)

Landshark Island Style Lager - I guess in hindsight I shouldn't have but I was expecting a very different taste. If you've had Corona then you've had this. 3/5

Tap Room No. 21 Amber Ale - Run of the mill amber ale with a watered down flavor. On the case it says they're celebrating the end of prohibition. Tastes like they're just trying to make a buck. 2/5

Red Hook Copper Hook Spring Ale - Now here is some good *bleep*ing amber. I don't get what's spring about it but I don't give a *bleep* either. 4/5

Alaskan Winter Ale - I know it's the middle of spring but I found a bottle of this sequestered in the recesses of my fridge. A very cool, crisp tasting pine undertone makes this one of my favorite winter seasonals. 5/5

Stone IPA - Not the biggest fan when it comes to pale ales but I felt my list of reviews was becoming too formulaic. The fact that this IPA is brewed by Stone gives it high marks but most IPAs I've tasted in the past don't have such a potent flavor nor the strength of this particular remedy. Perhaps I need to try more? 4/5

Stella Artois suggested by Fatal Error - I've heard a lot about this brew but I've always cast it aside as a silly Euro fancy. Lo and behold it is actually a really decent beer. Nothing too empowering but it beats most standard American beers in flavor by a longshot. 4/5

05/09

Newcastle Brown Ale - Tastes sweet, rich, and very smooth. I like it. 4/5

Dos Equis Amber - A darker, richer tasting version of a normal Dos Equis. Calling it amber is a bit much but it's still better tasting than the normal variety. 3/5

Samuel Adam's Boston Lager - All these Sam Adam's commercials finally convinced me to give this little guy a try. It certainly is tasty, but their boast of best tasting American beer left me with a little more to be desired. 3/5

Rollick Spring Amber Lager - From Pyramid Brewing comes the oddest tasting amber I've ever had. It really didn't do a whole lot for me, and the name looks like the words Rick Roll mashed together. 2/5

Drop Top Amber Ale - I've never been a fan of anything from the Widmer Brothers, I just don't find the texture of their beers appealing, which I understand is actually a point of pride for them.. All in all though not half bad and it does the deed in a pinch. 3/5

Grolsch Premium Lager - "The Original Swing Top"! Surely a flimsy marketing ploy, however ensnared I may have become. It took me at least 30 seconds to figure out how to open this bastion. When I finally did, at first it scared the shit out of me, but then I was excited. Like a kid at Christmas. With a trembling hand I partooketh of said nectar. And it tasted like Heineken.

*bleep* Holland. 1/5

Lunatique Abbey Style Tripel Belgian Ale - Long names are always better than something from Holland. 5/5

Steinlager Classic - New Zealand's finest tastes an awful like Grolsch, which is never good company to be in. A little bit more flavor though. 2/5

Kirin Ichiban - Another uninspired Japanese beer. The only redeeming quality it has is being able to yell its name as loud as you can when you're drunk. 2/5

Euphorique Abbey Style Blonde Ale - Not as good as the Tripel Belgian in my opinion but still worth every penny. 4/5

06/09

Moose Drool Brown Ale - Arguably I take a leap of faith every time I purchase a new half rack that I've never sampled before. Never before have I paid for such ignorance as when I consumed from a bottle of this sordid concoction. Honestly my 1 to 5 scale doesn't do this shit any justice, it's awful. Honestly, I've drunk beers I didn't really enjoy the flavor of, but this is the first one I've ever come across that just tasted so bad I couldn't marshal the fortitude to finish it.

Go around via Canada if you ever need to get through Montana for whatever reason. -5/5

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