Petzrule shared a news (@bluexy)
Jan 10, 14 6:25am
STACKABLE DOORS. Minecraft is now perfect. xD

Blessed are we Minecraft fans who have struggled through such a broken game. Today our cries are heard, Mojang's 1.8 snapshot for Minecraft has been released and fixes the most egregious of errors -- doors now stack. Yes, now we may carry multiple d....

Petzrule blogged
Nov 12, 13 10:07am

A few weeks back, I spoke with my doctor about the possibility that I might have Bipolar disorder, or manic depression as it is sometimes referred to. This is a mental condition in which those affected experience periods (as short as a few days and as long as a few months) of negativity and depression and also periods of extreme happiness known as mania. I had approached my doctor about the potential issue after spotting patterns in my behaviour, while at college. There would be some weeks where I would be an astounding student and would produce multiple Distinction grade (highest grade in BTEC courses) assignments. I would be continuously focused on the work and my views of the future would be highly optimistic. But then there were other times when I was a nightmare. I would sleep during class and sometimes fail to attend at all, I would fall so far behind with the work that I would fail to meet deadlines. My views of the future during these times were very pessimistic. I would feel as though my future was unimportant, and that all that mattered to me was to get through life and be the bare minimum that I can be. Honestly, this is the view that I most often have.

After completing the first year of college, I decided that I could no longer keep up with things and so I dropped out with the intention of getting a job and finding my place in the world that way. Around this time is when I decided to speak to my doctor about my mental health, and get a second opinion on whether or not my behaviour was similar to that of someone with Bipolar disorder. After I explained my reasons for thinking I was Bipolar, he agreed with me that there was a strong possibility I could have the disorder. He made an appointment for me to see a professional and have a one-off chat about my mental health to see if I was at risk, or if further action needed to be taken.

So today was my appointment and I think it went great. Although I am now even less clear on what my mental condition is, it was invaluable to be able to have a one-to-one chat about all the things in my head and about the ways that I deal with stress and problematic situations. My method for that is simple; If it's causing me stress, then I'll throw it aside and find something else to think about. Granted, that isn't a long-term solution but the mental health specialist actually said it seemed to work for me so it may be a good idea. After the meeting, he explained that he didn't think I was completely Bipolar, though my mood swings are definitely apparent, and because I cope well with stress and am good at containing my emotions (besides the late night tears sometimes) he said I probably didn't need to worry about my mental health for the most part. He does want me to attend a few counselling sessions in future because he feels I would benefit from being able to better understand myself through speaking in one-to-one sessions.

So yeah, I'm kind of Bipolar but not Bipolar. I have the mood swings and such, but I deal with it well so apparently it's not an issue for the most part. For me, the depression is more of an annoyance, or a barrier, than an actual risk to my safety and the mania is pretty great (aside from spending money carelessly on things for other people because I feel like it) so I'm not at risk there either. Sometimes you'll talk to me and I'll be excited and outgoing and other times you'll try and talk to me and I'll push you away so I can be alone, but don't worry because my opinion of you never changes. Helping people get through their lives is the only thing that makes me feel like I truly have a purpose and if I can make a single person smile, or simply feel a little better, then it was worth me getting up that morning.

- Toby <3
Nov 12, 13 9:55am
Capitalised, baby! Thank god Neoseeker acknowledges my stupidity when I first created my username! :D
Petzrule shared a news (@RabidChinaGirl)
Aug 20, 13 4:58am
Yet another Xbox One title I'm excited for... :D

Fable Legends is officially coming, as Lionhead Studios announces their next-gen Fable game this morning with a brand spankin' new trailer. That's right, we are heading back to the land of Heroes. The trailer teases four Heroes of Strength, Will, an....

Apr 18, 13 3:06am
In about a month, I'll have been here for 5 years. I miss when this place was amazing :(
Oct 18, 12 10:36am
Used to feel like my life was going nowhere, and that's because it wasn't. Now it is going somewhere... and that's a scary prospect..
Oct 17, 12 4:33am
Next time you're looking at all the stereotypical people around you, think "What stereotype do they give me?"
Oct 14, 12 10:50am
The hardest thing to do is to talk about being yourself. It's so hard to explain things you feel, when you don't know why you feel them.
Oct 13, 12 1:14am
They say nothing lasts forever, and that includes things like hate, anger, and depression. You'll get through them.
Sep 9, 12 6:36am
Petzrule, Starz, BB Brona, Shortman etc... Neoseeker class of 2008 :D
Aug 16, 11 4:12am
Decided not to leave Neoseeker! :D I need to make my mind up :P Anyway, for at least the time being, I'm going to be here. yay! :P
Jul 23, 11 12:30pm
Goodbye forever Neoseeker. It's been a great 5 years and thanks everyone who has been there for me, and with me along the way :)
Feb 25, 11 8:53pm
Misses everyone on neoseeker so much i decided to check back and beg you all to add me on MSN -
Petzrule blogged
Jun 13, 10 8:45am

So i know I havent been online a lot scince aaages, and i think, having been on neo three years, the time has come for me to bid farewell forever I think a nice thing to do is to dedicate this post to all the friends ive made here and some that i may never see again, even though we have been so close. I dont know why im leaving, i just feel its my time. so the first person i am going to mention is Starz, Melanie, you mean the world to me. you were the first real online friend i had and the first person ever that i would really call "my friend". I will always think of you, no matter how upset it makes me. thanks for beeing awsome! Next there is possibly the inspiration to my life, and although he will probebly never see this post, i want to thank blackgun because although we faught all the time, you were like a big brother to me, and thats what big brothers do! you are one of the greatest people on the planet and keep that going. I miss you now and will continue to do so. thank you. Next is someone who although i never really got to know that well, i spoke to all the time and i want to thank angel88891 for the good memories. I also want to thank shortman, sapphireyon, drakon the dragon and all the other people who i have known on neoseeker. everyone here are completely amazing and when i think of them, I will think of good times and happiness. Despite the speech, I think this is what's best. If anyone wants to keep in contact my msn is and my facebook is toby gosling (im the one in the black shirt and purple tie). So yeah, thanks everyone. I will think of you always. I love you all. sorry its been a bit of a long post but its because you all mean so much to me. please add me on msn, i beg you! I'm crying now but its a good crying. I want to write my signature for the last time so here it is:

--== Petzrule

neoseeker related
Feb 1, 10 4:23am
I am currently: not very active. I have had neo for over 2yrs now!!!
Petzrule blogged
Dec 11, 08 12:52pm

today was my most boring day of the week, thursdays (dun dun dun!) because the lessons we have are...

1st: geography (hate the teacher)
2nd: p.e. (the only good lesson today)
3rd: german (boring)
4th: english (right after german?)
5th: science (again boring)

but now that i've bored you again heres my...

---laugh of the day---

in science we were heating water with stuff called potassium nactatrate or sommin in it and my freind leaned over the bunsen burner and set his hair alight lol. his hair is still the same and he was'nt hurt so its ok to laugh.

ttfn bye

Petzrule blogged
Dec 10, 08 3:18pm

Just got a new avvy, like it?

anyhows... today at school i finished an art project ive been working on for what seems like eternity. its about a german artist. we had to make our own picture in the style of his, i've bored you enough so here's my...

---laugh of the day---

the artist we are studying(the german one) is called hundert wasser (strange name) which in english translates as 'dogs water' lol

btw how do i make this look neater?

ttfn bye ^_^

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