PEStar

One day, Mrs Sweeney, alone for 19 years since her challenged son Michael's father left after she hatched her rat spawn, was drinking a refreshing cup of tea her son had made with his professional training picked up from watching Saturday Kitchen Live in her backyard surrounded by broken bikes and broken dreams. Suddenly she felt a liquid hitting her bare skull. Confused, she exclaimed "Michael, are you pissing on me again?" to which Michael did not reply. For he was too upset, as it was the first day of summer and it was raining. At this point Michael realised he was not a resident of Turin, but Sunderland instead. So he became a *bleep* but stopped referring to Juventus as "us".