New section!!

This section of my neohome will from here on be dedicated to Jambo (aka Neale, Jambosfan1987 or Nev). He comes out with some rather stupid comments on MSN and later refuses to accept he was so stupid as to ask that. So here I will be keeping a record of these comments, enjoy.(NOTE: This section is ALWAYS under construction. Please keep checking back for more)

09 Sept 2007
About Online IQ Tests
OOTER says:
online ones are a joke
Nev says:
find a good un for me online then
Nev says:
http://www.cbc.ca/testthenation/episodes/wyl/test/
Nev says:
im taking that one
Nev says:
ill let you know when im finished
Nev says:
wait thats a language test

Nev says:
i have a question
Nev says:
how do painkillers know where the pain is?


10 Sept 2007
[12:00:31] [Jambo] i hate postcodes
[12:00:35] [Jambo] useless things

11 Sept 2007
11am
Nev says:
im doing no bad with the no smoking
OOTER says:
how long has it been?
Nev says:
since last nite

Nev says:
hows it best to get a good nights sleep?
Tez says:
Put that in your neohome Ooter
Nev says:
well, i have been having trouble sleeping at night now
Tez says:
It's tricky isn't it
Nev says:
dinnie take the piss outta this
Nev says:
cos its something alot of people have bother with
Tez says:
Called Insomnia
Nev says:
is it?
Nev says:
i thought that was something else
Tez says:
what did you think it was?
Nev says:
something to do with eating
Tez says:
Anorexia?
Nev says:
nah i know that
Nev says:
cos thats what hannahs got in hollyoaks
Tez says:
Was everything you know learnt from Hollyoaks?

17 September 2007
Nev says:
3-0 up after 10 mins
Nev says:
this not the team that hammered you 5-1 ooter?
Nev says:
im winning 3-1 v them
Nev says:
3-2*
Nev has left the conversation.
(Final score, Nev got beat 4-3)

26th Sept 2007
i fancy a carreer change in a few years
i feel like becoming a judge or a lawyer

30th Sept 2007
Nev says:
i already explained last week
Nev says:
iv stopped all contact with jenni
Nev says:
and this is me speaking
Tez says:
orly

8th October 2007
Nev says:
na i dont wanna get married yet
Nev says:
wait a few years maybe have a bairn first
Nev says:
i actually want a bainr before im 22

13th October 2007
Nev says:
sentances are usually started with a capitol letter and full stop

Nev says:
if ur giving me a lesson in punctuation atleast use it urself eh
Nev says:
Jambos point proved
Nev has left the conversation.
Nev has been added to the conversation.
Tez says:
Jambo's*

20th October 2007
Nev says:
makalambt get back in the trees
Nev says:
cocanut divin bastard
Kneeel says:
"im not racist"
Nev says:
isnt rascist

11th November 2007
Nev says:
guess what
Kneeel says:
What
Nev says:
me and jenni are gonna try for a baby
Kneeel says:
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Nev says:
im being deadly serious
Nev says:
tho she's gonna stay on pill till end of january
Kneeel says:
Well thats not going to work
Kneeel says:
You are a drunk in a trainees job going out with someone who wanted nothing to do with you a few months ago
Nev says:
im not a drunk
Kneeel says:
I bet/hope you're drunk now

23rd November 2007
[Jambo] thats one of my goals in life
[Jambo] to try and get to a world cup final
[Jambo] never going to happen
[OOTER] Jambo if you have enough money it's easy
[OOTER] £3k or something and you'd easy find a ticket.
[Jambo] hmm
[Jambo] thats like £333 a minute :D
[Jambo] i think
[Oz] he meant real life games jambo
[Oz] not 10 min fifa games

24th November 2007

Nev says:
got a plan for the flat
Kneeel says:
get her up the duff and get one off the council?
Nev says:
when shes up the duff, goto the council
Kneeel says:
LOOOOOOOOOL

03 December 2007
About his gf possibly being pregnant
Nev says:
which is wierd cos shes on the pill and iv always used a condom
Nev says:
so its pleasing yes, but worrying how its happened
Nev says:
cos odds of pill and condom failing are alot
Nev says:
99.9 percent for pill and 99.8 percent for condom
Nev says:
so thats like 199.9 percent chance of not being pregnant
Tez says:
must be some other guy then
Kneeel says:
I'll give odds of 2/11 of it being black


30th December 2007
[Dynamite] karmic balance
[Jambo] like non existent penalties you get
[Dynamite] we got screwed over with the penalty decision on boxing day
[Jambo] "shit chelsea losing - PENALTY"
[Oz] karma is non existent
[Dynamite] so god has rewarded us with a goal.
[Dynamite] it is god's will
[Oz] as are all nonscientific forces
[Oz] deal with it
[Jambo] what does karma mean?

6th January 2008
Nev says:
do u ever do like interviews in your head? :-O
Nev says:
when playing FM
Kneeel says:
no

13th January 2008
Nev says:
i think hearts should go all out and try and get mourinho
Kneeel says:
LOL
Nev says:
im serious

11th February 2008
Nev says:
well i have a doctor right
Nev says:
but whenever im at the doctors
Nev says:
i never see that doctor
Jes says:
perhaps you should take the doctor you have to the doctors with you

16th February 2008
Nev says:
going to the shop for beer for the football
Nev says:
not alot
Nev says:
prob 8
Nev says:
2 each half

Nev says:
see the presenters and that
Nev says:
they counted in the attendance?

17th March 2008
Nev says:
how many bands do you know called the who from scotland?
Kneeel says:
None
Nev says:
thought they were from dundee?
Kneeel says:
THE VIEW
Nev says:
same thing

23rd March 2008
Nev says:
btw
Nev says:
advice
Nev says:
dont hoover up your room then eat a boiled egg with a spoon

13th April 2009
[22:27] [Jambo] im a sucker for this lassies with big tits
[22:27] [Dan_bug] so shes probably shagging her dad or something
[22:27] [Jambo] i would if i was as rich
[22:29] [Madman] You'd shag your dad if you were rich?

22nd April 2009
[jambo] http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2008/10/23-End/michael-jackson-neverland.jpg
[jes] good one Jambo
[jambo] is it true he did actually start off black?
[m] are you seriously
[jes] i think that was a serious question

23rd May 2009
Nev says:
why are moths attracted to light?
Nev says:
wouldnt they be better if they slept at night and flew during the day

30th August 2009
[10 mins into Hearts' game vs St Johnstone]
Neale says:
got 2 pies in the oven for half time
Kneeel says:
fatty
Neale says:
be ready in 10 mins
Kneeel says:
not exactly timed it right then

The Story...

This Neohome is inspired by that of Daviesw and is sponsored by the wonderful people at Auran who brought us Trainz.

I first stumbled across Neoseeker in the same way as 90% of members appear to have, I was looking for help on GTA3. I would like to point out that I wasn’t looking for cheats like cheaters (Daviesw), but instead I had a problem which the members of the GTA3 forum told me was the "purple nines glitch". In my mission I was required to drive-by a certain number of gang members but these gang members were nowhere to be found once the mission was activated. I was told I had to restart the game from scratch:(

It was in the GTA3 forum I stayed for quite some time. It was also here my love for running competitions and games was born. I remember running a competition in which I would post a screenshot zoomed in on a specific area or banner using the sniper rifle, and other members would guess where in the city I was. Hey, its a crap idea but it was popular. If my.posthistory worked I'd dig it up for you.

Well, eventually, I ventured out with the confines of GTA3. I found my way to *shame*Fifa 2003*shame* forum. The game was a few months from release so it was a pretty good time to be discussing the news of the upcoming game. Well it just turns out that I was such an awesome member that I was asked to apply to be moderator of the forum. I did and I was promoted to moderator of the forum in November 2002. I enjoyed moderating the forum but it was also at this time that I started to play Pro Evolution soccer a lot more, and my interest in Fifa quickly diminished. I stuck it out with the forum until the discussion had dropped and I was demoted in February of 2003.

During my time in Fifa 2003 I had also ventured over to the Championship Manager 4 forum. It was in April 2003 that I became Championship Manager 4 co-moderator with Jambosfan1987 however I can barely remember events around this time. All I do remember was there being a number of demotions, promotions and re-promotions and when the dust settled I felt rather aggrieved. The forum also went down the pot.

In October 2003 the CM03/04 forum was very active and was under the leadership of Superfast Oz. Oz requested demotion and there was a huge amount of members applying to be moderator. Superfast Oz picked his successor himself and it was probably the biggest compliment in my "neo-life" that he chose me over quite a large number of members. So there I was, moderator of my 3rd forum and it was the toughest I'd had yet. The nature of CM/FM means that the forums are generally filled with n00bs and with that comes the spam. I battled on and was very strict on the quality of posts in the forum and had quite a lengthy list of people on PPD restrictions. Time came when the forum grew so large that I looked to get a co-mod to help me. I turned to the experienced Tehuti. We worked well for quite a while and when the forum died down I stepped down as it also coincided with my exams. Well, after this short break I returned to mod CM03/04 with Tehuti for a short time in the summer of 04. This time I left as I was moving to University and would no longer have proper access to the internet.

I think it was around the transition from CM4 to CM03/04 that I also found the Football(soccer) forum. My earlier posts are embarrassing but if you must you can just search through some of the first SPL threads. I'm my time in Football(soccer) I have ran a number of competitions. These include Sweepstakes(Euro 2004, Copa America 2004 ANC 2006, WC2006), Guess Who game, Captain Competition and a Guess the Stadium game. For a long time I was enjoying being a member in the forum as it's rare in that it has a community of members who all support different teams yet it's well organised and ran, mainly due to Superfast Oz and Nuggy. When Liam stepped down as moderator, Tez asked my if I was interested in moderating the Football(soccer) forum. I've taken on the challenge and at the time of writing it's only been a few weeks so we'll see how it goes.

I shall update in due time....

Due time has arrived(March 07). Well, I really enjoyed my time moderating the Football forum with Tez throughout the summer of 06. Of course this coincided with the World Cup in Germany and as such the forum was probably at it's most active since it's creation. I like to think myself and Tez worked well together to give everyone an enjoyable place to discuss the World Cup throughout and after the event.

Around about September 06 the Football Manager 2007 forum was requiring a moderator. There was obviously a very high amount of applications and Moderator Requests outdid themselves with such a poor appointment. They went with the lazy approach and selected the moderator of the previous forum, The Shape, despite it being a total shithole. I had previously aired my opinions on the FM05 and 06 forums and I was particularly annoyed that MR was so stupid as to select the same mod again. After some "discussions" I had just had enough with MR and requested demotion from the Football forum(/Rage Quit). The poor mod of that forum lasted less than a month before rage quitting himself after trying to get a known troublemaker as his co-mod. I was asked to apply (as I was still ineligable to apply as it had been less than a month since I was rejected in favour of the crap mod, but the MR system is a story for another time) and I was...surprised...to be promoted alongside Gers_Fan_no1 to FM07.

I found this another strange move as we had never even spoken to each other, and to pit two people who have had no contact whatsoever and one who had no moderating experience together was another stupid decision by MR. Gers_fan could quite possibly have been a good mod, but imo he was far too concerned with what his "msn mates" would think of him if he did anything against them (as the previous shit mod was) and so we never really got on. Gers_fan demoted from FM07 in January and I had to choose a co-mod. It was a very tough decision. Tbh there are very few members in the FM community who would make a good mod, perhaps this is a knock on effect of the past moderators reign. I ended up choosing Jespomo, who was a vastly experienced member and someone I had started to get to know through the Neo IRC channel. Myself and Jes worked hard to bring some order to the FM forum, but have always been knocking our heads against a brick wall. People request something, you implement it and it upsets other people. Anyway, around Feb 07 Jespomo was promoted to Loungin and he passed on the UK forum to myself. So far I have enjoyed my time moderating it. There's a lot less trouble than the FM forum and it's such a relief to mod a place that isn't (totally) full of noobs.

Also in Feb 07, jambos no1 joined myself and Jespomo as co-moderator of FM07. So far he's been doing a good job and I hope he can go on to be a good mod for the FM forums so perhaps I don't have to keep the whole place running by myself, tbh.

Next update "in due course", which prob means March 08. See ya.

After demoting from Football Manager 2007 I decided to bring the hammer down on stupid noobs in various forums such as Football and the Sports and Racing section for PS2. I had already managed to dramatically decrease the amount of morons in the UK and Ireland forum after the disastrous reign of previous mod jespomo.

Pretty soon I had my dictatorship established in Football with such rules brought in as the "Heil OOTER" salute and the law prohibiting "Pro English" opinions in international football threads. Also popular was my final solution for those posters who's only experience of Football comes from Football Manager and Match of the Day.

Soon though my reign of terror along side my co conspirator Heinrich Tezzler was overthrown after a violent coup ended in Tezzler's death and my fleeing to Argentina which also prevented me from moderating Sports and Racing effectively.

Eventually I relinquished all of my power on the site, much to the relief of those with an IQ lower than Nev's who suddenly found it safe to post again. These days I am sipping Pina Colada's in my Villa and plotting world domination once more.


Ok so you want a list of suckers I've be-friended on Neoseeker over the 5 years(jeez) that I've been here?

In an order only I know:
Tez
Nuggy
Daviesw
Liam
LFC Boy
Cookie
Jambosfan1987
Tehuti
AJ
Audacity
WiganAthDan
Jespomo
Jambos no1
And many from the IRC Channel
and some more I'll remember later...