We believe in one Captain,
the Falcon, the Almighty,
maker of Melee and of Brawl,
of all that is, played and unplayed.
We believe in one Lord, Ganondorf,
the only clone of Captain Falcon,
eternally begotten of the Captain,
knee from knee, pawnch from pawnch,
true 'Dorf from true Captain,
begotten, not made,
one in moveset with the Captain.
Through the Captain all things were pwned.
For us and for our salvation
he came down from F-Zero:
by the power of the Falcon Punch,
he came in a car named the Blue Falcon,
and manliness was made.
For our sake he was nerfed under Masahiro Sakurai;
he suffered loss and was buried.
On the third day he pwned again
in accordance with the FAQs;
he ascended into Brawl
and is seated by the Master Hand.
He will come again in glory
to pwn the noobs and the trolls,
and his asskicking will have no end.
We believe in the Falcon Punch, the standard B, the giver of pain,
which proceeds from the Captain.
With the Captain and the 'Dorf,
it is worshipped and glorified.
He has spoken through the taunts.
We believe in One Holy Falconist and freaking l33t Church.
We acknowledge one Knee for the punishment of noobs.
We look for the resurrection of the bread,
and the awesomeness of the sequels to come.