Darknet blogged
Jul 10, 13 12:51pm

There was once a time a long time ago where Bleach was, get this, really good. It was fresh, had good battles, a great concept, and a great art style. But to say Bleach has gone downhill would be an understatement. Downhill would be too nice. More like it fell off a cliff. For the forums, Bleach is just a joke factory to make fun of it. So because I'm bored as hell, I'll tell the top 5 fails in Bleach history.

5: Quincy Kills a Man During Sex

This was pretty recent. Showing off his grand knowledge about German names, Bambietta Basterbine, who is part of the Bleacg G-Cup club, kills a guy during sex. She invites a guy in, has sex with him, and then kills him. Yup I really don't have to say much.

4: Aizen's Cocoon Phase

People have given Kubo shit about his minimalism style of drawing. I've never bought in to the hate. I kind of liked the way Bleach looked. Even during The Heart. But this was the moment where I started to shake my head in shame. Have you ever had the moment when you were in school, when you realize
you forgot to do an assignment? Then you do it really quickly to turn it in and do a shitty job? In my head I like to believe this is what Kubo did. After a night of drinking, celebrating how awesome he thinks he is, he wakes up the next day and forgets to draw Aizen's Chrysalis form. So, hangover and all, he draws it. This was the result


3: Basically the Whole Fullbring Arc

Kubo saw that both One Piece and Naruo had time skips. So Kubo thought "I'll do it too! And do it better because I'm Tite *bleep*ing Kubo!" So he ends the threat of Aizen and takes a couple of weeks off. Which I think he spent most of his time partying and drinking. So we come back with....this. It was awful. A God awful return. This arc was actually the time when I stopped reading Bleach for awhile. I eventually returned and read the rest but....this was a breaking point for me.

2: Kenpachi's Trump Trump Card

To some, this may not seem like the biggest deal. But I believe it holds significance because it's a perfect example at how Kubo drops the ball. Like he has a priceless vase in his hands and then drops it on the floor and shatters it. We come to the point where Kenpachi fights the 5th Espada, Nnoitra. After a lengthy battle, they finally decide to stop dicking around and fight at full power. Kenpachi takes off his eye patch, Nnoitra releases his true power. And as it turns out, Nnoitra was winning and could seriously beat Kenpachi. It was good because it showed the threat and power of the Espada. Nnoitra, who was only #5, was beating Kenpachi "Mother *bleep*ing" Zaraki. How dangerous are 1-4? And if Aizen is more powerful than them, then how dangerous is Aizen? This was good. So Kenpachi pulls out his trump trump card. Is it some hidden power? Is it a special technique? No, he just uses two hands. Kendo, to be precise. Just a big failure. And he kills Nnoitra is one hit, thus negating everything I said before.

1: Yammy is the Strongest Espada (But Not Really)

Here it is, Number 1! For me, this was the moment where I finally said "Bleach isn't as good as it once was" May of taken me a bit longer but we all come to the same conclusion eventually. So this here is what I call a "fail onion" with layers and layers of fail. So first layer is that Yammy, the punching bag of the Espada forces, reveals himself to be the weakest Espada. BUT, when he unleashes his power, he is the strongest. The second fail layer is when, get this, his tattoo number changes when the 1 disappears, revealing himself to be Espada Zero. Ugh...the final fail layer is that he really isn't the strongest but maybe jumped from like I dunno....10 to 7? I dunno if Yammy was talking out his ass or if Kubo doesn't understand the powers of his own characters but Yammy was far from the strongest. Yammy eventually fights Kenpachi and Byakuya. They kick his ass so badly that they get bored and start fighting each other. Once Yammy gets pissed he was being ignored, and interrupted the fight, the two captains finally decide to kill him. KUBO'D!

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Darknet blogged
Mar 24, 13 4:22pm

The costume is what makes the superhero. It is a symbol to represent themselves. But many of these people were designed back in the 40s and 50s. Way different times from today. So I'm here to rate the Top 5 best and worst.

Little not to everyone on some rules. I'm doing this before the new 52, as many superheroes have had their uniforms changed. Some had a different costume from when they were introduced but eventually stuck to one design for the rest of their comic book lives. If their costumes have changed a lot, like Cyborg's or Iron Man, then they won't be on this list. Batman is not on this list. He has gone through many costume tweaks and thus does not make this list. One last rule: if they were introduced in the 70s to present (no Wolverine), they don't count either. So let's get to it!

The Best


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Darknet blogged
Feb 04, 13 1:21pm

There is a story I'd like to tell you all. It's a story about two shows, which are loved by many. They were great shows, which could be watched and loved by people of all ages. This is their beginning and this is their end.

Let us start from the beginning. Greg Weisman is one of the world's best animators when it comes to TV shows. Everything he is involved with is just awesome. He lost his last show, The Spectacular Spider-Man, not to bad ratings but from Disney buying Marvel and thus ending the show. So Greg Weisman moved on and created Young Justice. It was a show that was complex, funny, action packed, and rich. It was so good that I said it was the best DC animated show I've ever seen. And it still is in my eyes. Then there is Green Lantern: TAS. Bruce Timm, known for the massively popular Timmverse he created with shows like Batman: TAS, Superman: TAS, and the Justice League show. He was returning to create a show for Green Lantern, a superhero that was going places. The show was created to heighten Green Lantern along with the movie starring Ryan Reynolds. GL:TAS featured a great spin on the show, introducing great characters like Aya and Razer.

Each show was beloved. Young Justice was the #2 show on Saturday behind Star Wars: The Clone Wars and GL:TAS was just behind Young Justice. Where did it all go wrong?

The first nail in the coffin was the toy lines getting canceled. Toys are very important to kid shows like this. Cheap to make and a lot to charge. Young Justice had the worst of luck of getting their toys made by Mattel, and were shitty and thus no one bought them. GL:TAS actually had a good toy line but no one bought them. The biggest reason for that was the movie being so shitty. It marred the image of Green Lantern and no one wanted to buy their toys. So they were canceled.

But both shows were already ordered a second season, so they were coming no matter what. But there was a sense of dread. You stopped seeing commercials for the shows on CN. Not even a commercial to say when the show was coming back for a Season 2. Young Justice got only a couple of episodes in to Season 2 before it was delayed to work on the next episodes. GL:TAS was getting ready to premiere. They came back a bang. A couple of episodes in to the return, it happened: the delay.

Me and many others woke Saturday morning. I turned on CN and selected "Green Lantern: TAS" and instead of Hal Jordan, I was greeted with Dragons: Riders of Birk and Johnny Test. Out of the blue and so suddenly, CN pulled both Young Justice and GL:TAS for the next year. It happened so suddenly that the TV providers couldn't change the names. To this day, CN has never given a reason as to why they did this. There are theories but one kind of stands out.

A producer from Adventure Time said that, when comedy shows get popular, they get rid of the action shows. The delay's reason was believed to be an attempt to destroy the show. The idea is to delay it and bring it back with no mention, thus hurting the ratings. So when the ratings were bad, it would be justified in canceling it. This is backed up because the exact same thing happened to Thundercats and He-Man. Funny enough, it didn't work. When the delay came, CN forgot to pull the episodes from iTunes. The next day they took them off but not before a shit load of people bought them. Young Justice and GL:TAS became one of the most bought shows of the week. Not the best cartoons or best of the day. The best show of all TV for the entire week. And when the shows came back from the delay, the ratings weren't hurt.

But that didn't stop CN as they announced their list of shows for 2013-2014. Both Young Justice and GL:TAS were not on that list. It is gone. The fan backlash has been, shall we say, strong. If you go to CN's Facebook page, every update they make is filled with people asking for the shows to return. Their twitter is being spammed and here are multiple petitions going on that each range in to the tens of thousands. Will the campaign work? Probably not.

This is just a lesson, a tale if you will about the injustice of the world. A network would get rid of two beloved, much watched shows for no real reason. In the end, nothing good lasts forever. But then again, we kind of wish it would last just a little bit long.

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Darknet blogged
Sep 05, 12 10:42am

Venture Brothers is one of those rare shows that I love enough to buy the DVDs for. You may think that isn't all that special but it is! For DVDs are expensive and I am poor. However, the show is more than worth it. The show has a mix of story, continuity, and different types of comedy that you really can't get from Fox's Animation Domination shows. Heck, it is something you can't get from any animated comedy show on TV. The show will be coming back sometime early next year, so I wanted to post what I think are the best episodes!

As it turns out, this was a very hard list to do. There are no bad episodes with this show. And they are usually the same quality. So when you see #1 and #10 , it wasn't a landslide win but it is pretty damn close.

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Darknet blogged
Aug 11, 12 1:01am

When I say Prince of Persia, I mean Prince of Persia 2008. Before I go on, let me give you give you a bit of history about the series and about my experience with it. The PoP series came back to life with the game Prince of Persia: Sands of Time. It was a magical game, one that stole the hearts of me and many gamers out there. Combining slick combat, awesome platforming, clever puzzles, and the ability to manipulate time, the game quickly became a success. The story followed the Prince and his companion Farah, who both trying to stop the villain who has unleashed the Sand's of Time upon the world.

The popularity grew with it's sequel, Warrior Within. Warrior Within was a much darker game than the first, featuring a prince that was rough, edgy, and a bit more brutal. It takes place seven years later and shows the repercussions of the Prince's exposure to the Sands and what he did in the first game. The whole game took place not in Persia but an island where the Sands first originated. The game remained the same to it's core, and featured some cool gameplay moments like being chased by the dreaded The Dahaka, a guy you simple cannot kill. Only thing you can do is run in terror.

Finally, the trilogy ended with The Twin Thrones, a game that combined the light hearted, whimsical tone of the first game with the edgy darkness of the second. Twin Thrones goes full circle, as it returns the Prince back to Persia to fight the villain from Sands of Time. This time the game shows the physical side effects of exposure to the Sands, as the Prince developed a dark alter ego, who you could play as!

Each game I loved and played the crap out of. These three games all happened on the Xbox and PS2, with the Two Thrones being released towards the end of the Xbox's life. With the Two Thrones rapping up the story nicely, Ubisoft decided to reboot the franchise for the next generation. So in 2008, Ubisoft released the rebooted titled simply called Prince of Persia.

This game featured a Prince (voiced by Nolan North) who wasn't actually a prince but a thief and a wanderer. The Prince is teamed up with the elegant Elika (voiced by Kari Wahlgren), a woman who wield's the power of magic. The story involves a land that is corrupted by an evil force, slowly being consumed by darkness. The Prince and Elika race to stop it, while trying to get along with each other. Prince and Elika were the staple in combat, with one being able to do physical attacks with a sword (Prince), one with magic (Elika) and acrobatic (together). You could combine these in to any combination, thus making fights look different each time. But the main staple is the platforming and puzzles, which I'm happy to proclaim is not just intact but better than ever.

In many ways, Prince of Persia tried to make things simple, rather than complicate them. While the combat I described could be a bit complicated, the fights were always one on one. You never fought a room of enemies like you did with the first game. The story was simple, with the basic plot of boy meets girls, there is an overwhelming evil and it needs to be stopped, blah blah blah. Funny enough, there were almost no other characters in the game. Even the villain didn't have a real personality. In fact, 95% of the game was just Elika and the Prince. The visuals were simplified, compared to trying to boost the graphics with detail. But I will get to that later. What of the platforming? The platforming became less freestyle and became a bit more streamlined. But that didn't mean you couldn't fail. Finally, the game decided to remove the time powers, being the first in a very long time. Instead the mechanic was replaced with Elika's magic.

While the game was still the same at it's core, many people thought the game was a major step back. In each PoP game for the Xbox and PS2, the game got more and more complicated. Combat, visuals, and even the story became more complicated with each game. There were some hurt PoP fans out there and many of them just couldn't get in to this new PoP.

But it is with great sadness that I state what I think the game will be remembered for one thing: the inability to die. You see, Elika was able to use magic to pull off some incredible stuff. And one of the ways she used her magic was to save the Prince's life. Say you fell off a ledge to your death in Sands of Time. You'd use your powers to rewind what just happened. If you were out of sand, you'd die and reload at the last checkpoint. But with Prince of Persia, Elika always saved you and brought you back to the beginning of the ledge or the start of the string of platforming. You literally would fall off and a cinematic would start up of her catching your hand. Even against enemies, she would save you.

This feature was probably the most disliked by fans. Simply put, the game babied you. And not just fans, but the gaming media as well. I've read articles from gaming websites to this day that still reference that mechanic. And to tell you the truth? It is a feature I still don't fully agree with. Death keeps us on edge. Why be on our guard when we got magic woman to save us? It didn't bother me as much, though. I think of it like this: in Sands of Time, you fall of a ledge and "die", you go back to a certain point. Same thing here, except you never "died". You were "rescued". Is there that much of a difference?

And I love the game. But I will admit I was a little...bitter about the game at first. I was a big fan of the Sands of Time trilogy and this was kind of an outrage. But as I continue to play the game, I fell in love. In my mind, simplifying some aspects of the game was for the best. It was still PoP at it's core and in some ways the simple nature helped to get back to the roots of why we loved those mechanics.

What was once thrashing a whole room of baddies became a one-on-one choreographed fight. It made fights more personal when it was one-on-one. The simple story, combined with great voice acting and even greater dialogue, got me emotionally invested in the Prince and Elika. And seeing what happens with them was my drive to find out what happens to them. I could care less about the land being consumed by an evil force.

However, one of the best things about this game was the visuals. They were amazing. It is probably one of the best uses of cell shading I've seen so far. it wasn't just the graphics but it was the overall design of the environment and characters. The game was colorful, beautiful, bright, dark, and stunning, all without being demanding on hardware. I would go as far as to save it is one of my favorite graphics in any game I've played. Top 5, at the least.

So what happened? Why no sequel? The game did well in the financial and critical department for the most part. Well a couple of things happened. The first big thing is Hollywood. Disney was making a Prince of Persia movie, which I personally loved. It did okay critically and financially but didn't make a big impression. The movie kind of caused Ubisoft to go back to the Sands of Time formula and with the sequel The Forgotten Sands. Secondly, while there are many of us who embraced the new style, many people didn't feel the same way. So this was an attempt to going back to a know working method. I'll let you in on a dirty secret: I haven't played the the Forgotten Sands. Not even for a second. I've read about it and seen videos. What I saw was a PoP of the past and to me it was a step backwards. It also took place in the Sands of Time trilogy, thus acting as a big ass pimple on the forehead of a supermodel's face. I probably will never play that game.

We pop forward to today, and things look more and more dim of there being a sequel. Ubisoft seems pretty content on focusing it's time and attention on the guaranteed money bag franchise games like Assassin Creed, Splinter Cell, and other Tom Clancy titles. There hasn't been a lot of words on the Prince of Persia franchise altogether. Some talk has happened but some of it has been about a whole new reboot altogether. So the 2008 Prince of Persia will probably never get a sequel. The cliff hanger of an ending will never be concluded.

In some way, I can live with that. While I would love a sequel, I can live with the game being a moment in time. A game in the generation of the 360 and PS3 that stood out from the rest for what it did right or what it did wrong. A game that can be an example of something unique that may influence other games. A game that wasn't perfect but was perfect for me.

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Darknet blogged
Jun 19, 12 12:36am

There is a bit of a confusion or lack of reading when it came to my last list. I wrote that THESE ARE MY OPINIONS AND EXPERIENCES. So when the inevitable "Where is [insert name]" comes up, you need to understand that I either hated the show or don't watch it. Yes, I don't watch Simpsons. Just never got in to it. So, with further ado, here is the list.

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Darknet blogged
Apr 10, 12 2:40am

Okay, so let me get this straight here: these are things that I found very sad. So for all you people who will post "What about Aerith's death?!" or "What about The Boss dying in MGS3?" I've never played FF7 and I'm not connected to MGS as many people. Oh I know about them but it would feel like a huge lie to myself to put these on the list when they don't really mean anything to me. Does that make them better or worse? Not at all. If there are things I've missed, please remember this is stuff I've experienced. So lets get on with the list: and remember there are spoilers.

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Darknet blogged
Mar 28, 12 2:13pm

Before we begin, let me explain the rules. Okay there is only one rule and that is one character per show. So let it begin!@

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Darknet blogged
Dec 19, 11 7:32pm

So I've decided to start a new segment called Darknet's Magical....you can read the title. It is essentially my attempt, and hopefully a successful one, to be funny when it comes to my gaming experiences. So hopefully I will get the hang of it and you all enjoy. Let it begin.

For a quick intro, my character on Skyrim is an all Mage high elf. I am currently level 22.

Killing Bitches

Before I got off last time, I ended up getting a quest from a child named Aventius. Walked in on him performing what looked to be a satanic ritual. Kids these days...He wanted me to kill a lady called Grelod the Kind because she is a bad person. I thought to myself "Sure, I love killing people for children who may or may not deserve it". I decided to play along and went to Riften to check this out. In a situation that could only happen in an Elder Scroll's game, I got stopped by a guy named Maul, whose voice is the same as 50 other people in this game. He told me leave the Black Briars alone. WAY TO BE SUBTLE, ELDER SCROLLS! Then I helped some black dude pay off his debts because I'm that kind of person.

After entering the orphanage, I wondered if I would get in trouble for even killing an old lady. After hearing her depressing and awful pep talk to the orphans, I said *bleep* it. So I shot a Fireball to the back of her head. Then I robbed her corpse. The kids cheered and I was a hero! I ran outside and was afraid I was gonna get arrested. I wasn't arrested and no one seemed to give a *bleep*.

I Had a (Bad) Dream!

I went to Dawnstar to take care of some the backlog of quests I have. Apparently they were having nightmares. Oh boo hoo. Walked in to an inn to follow some bearded dude. Sat there and watched a woman (badly) sing a song while an old lady stood next to me and tell me stories about how all her children left an her husband died. It was awkward. After the people at the inn gave a Joker clap to the bad singer, we were off to deal with these nightmares as the creepy bearded man told me to follow him.

Oh and there was a dragon attacking some people at Riften. Decided nightmares were more important than dragons. I'm sure they will be ok....right? As this thought came to mind, the dragon landed in front of us and proceeded to attack my guide. Not me, my guide. What?! I'm not good enough for you, dragon? Needless to say, this dragon was an asshole. I killed the Blood Dragon because he was too busy NOT GIVING A *bleep* ABOUT ME!


As if not to make this game any more random, I get a note from the Dark Brotherhood RIGHT AFTER THE DAMN DRAGON BATTLE. So I took the dragon loot and was too heavy. I went to the nearest place to stash the bones and crap because I was too heavy. I won't go in to details but I got arrested by the Dawnstar guards.

After a night in prison I continued to follow my guide, who was really slow. Painfully sloooooooooooow. After arriving at the fort, which is literally 300 yards away from the town, I'm told of the story behind this place. The place was raided by orcs, the priests in the building put everyone to sleep with a gas named Misama. The gas slowed down the aging process and caused their minds to become damaged and savage. Well that sucks for me.

Blah blah blah we need to find a book. What? You mean this big pretty book sitting on this big pedestal? After laughing at him when he flips through the book with an axe in his hand, we I need to take a potion to allow me to enter dreams. So I gotta be a guinea pig for a dangerous, experimental potion? I hate this guy. I take the potion and wonder if I took a magical potion or LSD. Blah blah blah we finally get to the skull.

When my slow companion turns off the barrier, the skull speaks to me and tells me to kill Erandur. She (and she sounds like Glados) tells me Erandur will turn on me afterwards. I almost did it if not for the last words "I command you to do it."


No one commands me! And if he tried to kill me, I'll kill him. Erandur is a punk ass bitch. I step aside and let him destroy the skull and it dies. Command that! So I expect something in return. Well he can't give me anything because he is a poor priest. So he decides to offer help at any time. Great because your as useful as using a tissue paper during a bull fight.

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Darknet blogged
Dec 15, 11 12:48am

So I made a list for DC. Why not Marvel?

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Darknet blogged
Dec 05, 11 2:39pm

Shows like Spiderman and X-Men will always stay in my heart. I love those shows. But if you were to ask me which company between Marvel and DC has had the strongest backing behind their animated universe in the recent years, it would be DC. And it makes sense. You make money from a show like that but it's also a good way to get people in to your comics. It is DC animated shows that ended up becoming my base knowledge for me in everything DC comics and could be the reason why I buy their comics today (besides the new 52 thing). So I felt it would be a good idea to rank the best of the DC animated shows.

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Darknet blogged
Nov 30, 11 2:54pm

Kid's movies today are pussies. Years ago, kids movies would always created a wonderful movie experience but would always have WTF moments. It was almost a fact that Disney wanted to scare their kids a little bit. Nowadays kids are cradled and taken care of. So I'm here to point out the best of the best.

5. Willy Wonka's Magical Boat Ride

It's a kids movie about a poor boy who ends up winning a ticket to get a tour of a magical chocolate factory. In the end he gains control of that factory. A pretty good premise for a kid. Well there was one instant where the movie turned everything on it's head and then put it back together. The tourist and their parents get on a boat that floats down a chocolate river. Well going down the river, you are suddenly sucked in to a trippy, horrifying scene where everyone starts freaking out and Willy Wonka talks like a psycho. The whole thing was like taking shrooms and the shrooms turn on you. What made this more confusing is that there was nothing messed up in the show before and after this point. You go through a light hearted movie, get weirded the *bleep* out, and then everything is back to normal.

4. Pee Wee and Large Marge

Pee-wee's playhouse was always kind of messed up. it was a quirky, silly kids show but on the surface you could tell something was wrong. And you could never put your finger on what was so messed up with it. Like you would completely expect Pee Wee just to slit the King of Cartoon's neck at any second. But he wouldn't. Maybe it was because it was trying to be something it wasn't. Even Penny the claymation girl creeped me out. So Pee Wee made the big screen with Pee Wee's Big Adventure. And it was directed by Tim Burton. Yeah...

One scene involves Large Marge. On Pee-wee's journey to find his bike, he ends up getting a ride with a trucker. Almost instantly it is made clear that something is wrong. As you continue to sit there and watch Pee-wee and Large Marge, the tension starts to grow and grow. Eventually Marge's face turns claymation and scares the shit out of Pee-wee and every child watching the movie. To this day I still don't understand the point of that outside of scaring kids.

3. Christopher Lloyd Goes Insane

It is hard to imagine Christopher Lloyd playing an evil man after his Back to the Future films. But you could tell that Chrisopher Lloyd's character Judge Doom was a bad bad guy. I mean his name has the word Doom in it. Earlier in the movie he kills a cartoon shoe by essentially boiling the poor thing alive. Well Judge Doom doesn't go off till the ending. And everything at the ending battle with him is messed up. The first is the man is rolled over by a steamroller. Can't emphasis how messed up it is to watch a real human get rolled over by a steamroller in a kids movie. After he is flatten and his screams of pain end, he gets up. This flatten man gets up and starts walking. If you haven't shit yourself at that point, the next point will. Judge Doom's fake eyes pop out.

And they reveal these evil red cartoon eyes. Next he starts talking to Eddie Valiant as his voice slowly goes to a high pitched psycho voice. That is the point where I started to cry as a kid. Throughout the rest of the fight, he continues to attack Eddie using knives and saw blades. He is finally killed...by being melted. In the end all that is left is a pile of skin and blood.

2. The whole Transformer movie

The Transformers movie acted as a turning point for the series as a whole. The creators wanted to replace the entire cast with newer people. This was primarily done to promote new toy sales. So how do you get rid of an entire cast of Transformers and replace them with new ones? Why you kill them all, of course.

If you watched this whole show as a kid, you grew up with these guys. Optimus, Iron Hide, Prowl, Jazz etc... The show was very kid friendly. Then the movie came out and took our love and crushed it like a fat man sitting on a weak chair. We all know about Optimus Prime, the leader of the Autobots, dying. It is an iconic scene. No what I'm here to do is to bring to light the other messed up crap in this movie.

The first couple of things is the death of some of your favorite Transformers. The first deaths are Ironhide and Prowl. Seems odd that the Decepticons took care of something in the first 20 mins in what they've been trying to do throughout the entire show. So first is Prowl, who is shot up so much that smoke pours out his eyes and mouth. Next is Ironhide (my favorite Transformer) who is blasted in the face and killed by Megatron as he tries to impossibly stop Megatron. It is off screen, but still...

Then you have the deaths of other people who you don't know. One guy is killed by being eaten alive by mechanical piranas. Other Transformers are melted in a vat of acid while they scream in agony. And to top it all off, Spike ended up yelling the word "shit".

1. Artax Dies

Seemed like a no brainer. So I'm gonna break this down for you all.

The first part of this being messed up is that it hits us personally. Artax, the horse of Atreyu, dies. I'm sure nearly all of us has or had a pet. To see a pet like him die can make you think of your own pet's dying. And that hits you very hard. The next thing is the fact that it is a very slow death. it's not like with Argo in Shadow of the Colossus where he falls off a cliff. No, Artax slowly goes down to the bottom of the swamp. And then take in to account that Atreyu is going completely apeshit while all of this is going on. It's so messed up and soul crushing that I can't fully describe it.


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Darknet blogged
Jan 24, 11 10:10pm

There is nothing better than playing a video game with friends. It is something me and my friends will buy for the experience alone. I will admit that me and my friends look like idiots when playing together but it's so much fun to the point that we find it hard to play alone afterwards. 2011 is looking to release some incredible co-op games like Portal 2, Bulletstorm, and Hunted: The Demon Forge. One stipulation is that I didn't include arcade games. So here is a list of the best co-op games...so far.






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Darknet blogged
Aug 06, 10 9:33pm

I like to watch anime but I don't really consider myself a mega fan like the people in the Anime forum. That is why the key word in this list is "I've". But from what I've seen, animes goes in to all types of extremes. While there are some that hold you hand throughout the entire plot, there are some that tend to not hold your hand at all. And those can get pretty crazy. So here is a list of the 4 animes that were the most confusing. And there are no spoilers.

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Darknet blogged
May 17, 10 6:57pm

I love movies and thus have decided to make a blog post for it. And what better thing to talk about than best twists? Now we all know big iconic twists like "Luke, I am your father" or "The secret ingredient is people". But I'm going to take it from the last twenty years as to which one is the best twist of all time. Warning, there are spoilers.

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Darknet blogged
Mar 31, 10 4:46pm

I've read many reviews about FFXIII, and one of the main complaints I hear about it being bad is quite simple the sentence "It's not Final Fantasy". Now, before I go on, this isn't defending FFXIII from haters. This is to address a much broader issue.

This is the first Final Fantasy game I've played. But I watched a series by Gametrailers that talks about the history of the game, so I have some knowledge. FF for ages has had traditional element like Chocobos, Cid Raines, same summon names, etc... What is also included is the tradition of being an RPG with an open world that you can slowly unlock parts of at a time with a turned based or more advanced form of turned based combat. This has always been in Final Fantasy and when people see one of these traditions broken, they hate it. This is the problem with tradition in the fact they hamper the developers. Developers aren't able to do new and better things, they have to conform to a certain style, and games fail to evolve.

I like to compare it to baseball. Baseball has several things wrong with the game, and the inclusion of slow-motion replay would be a nice touch. However, since the game has remained unchanged for nearly a century, people do no want it to change. It is this tradition that keeps it from becoming a better sport. You may hate the analogy due to Final Fantasy being around for about 20 years while baseball has been around for over a century. But you cannot deny it is similar.

Look at other JRPGs around you. Tales of Vesperia had good combat and multiplayer in it. MULTIPLAYER! How many JRPGs can make that claim? Star Ocean 4's combat is one of funnest I've ever played. Resonance of Fate makes a new spin of combat. Those series are ground breaking. How long has it been since FF has done anything ground breaking? I bet if you put Star Ocean's combat in Final Fantasy, people would freak. It would be hated, even though the combat is much better and I can play with friends.

Tradition isn't always bad. But when tradition stops the evolution and good change of things, then you need to throw tradition out the door.

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Darknet blogged
Mar 29, 10 4:43pm

I had the extreme displeasure of watching Ninja Assassin for the first time. A short little review: it had great action and fighting sequences, everything else was shitty. Of course this also feature ninjas. However, the primary bad thing about this is it does a bad job at conveying what a ninja is. So here is a list of things that, if they happen to you, you are a horrible ninja or not a ninja at all:

1) You get shot: In this movie, several ninjas got shot by guns. This should never happen. Ever. Ninjas are too...ninja to get shot by a common man's weapon. Even the head ninja of the whole *bleep*ing ninja clan got shot, although he retained some badassary by not being affected by the bullet wound to the point you question it ever happening. But the mere fact you got shot is bad enough.

2) You get hit by a car: Ninjas have the reflexes of a super cat and the speed or a mega cheetah. When you are running through traffic, they have the skill to avoid cars. But no. In a chase scene through a highway, several ninjas get hit by oncoming cars. Failure.

3) The victim knows hes getting killed by a ninja: This is something most people won't notice from the movie but the people who get killed by the ninjas know they are getting killed by a ninja. A ninja is so awesome at stealth that you shouldn't even know you're going to die until your dead.

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Darknet blogged
Mar 02, 10 9:29pm

So here is a funny little story for you all.

We were staying up and partying with some friends. It was about midnight and things were slowing down. So we all got hungry and decided to walk to Taco Bell, which is a couple of blocks down the rode.

We get to the street, the first thing we pass by is a donut store, which is literally 50 yards away from our house. There was a guy in the back passenger seat, puking outside of the car. His friend was looking at him, just shaking his head. Funny enough, they were in full blown suits like at the office or something. So the drunk guy stops puking and tells the other guy "Get me outta here, I wanna get laid". Okay, in that state you aren't getting any...

So we continue down the road to Taco Bell and this car of girls coming by start to honk their horn and scream at us. We were shouting back. I guess it was either because the driver was drunk or they weren't paying attention but they ended up drifting in to the opposite lane and almost got in to a full on collision. Luckily they miss.

We got to Taco Bell and ate our food and proceeded to make the journey back. We get back to the donut shop and my friends stops and says "Do you guys see that?" He pointed to a car at a red light. And in the car, a guy was getting a blow job from a girl. And she was going to town. Being the ass I am, I yell "Good for you, buddy!". Best thing ever? He rolled down his window and gave us the thumbs up. We laughed so hard.

And that was our Taco Bell run.

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Darknet blogged
Dec 16, 09 4:38am

I don't even know why I'm really typing this. Only a handful of people who read this will agree with me and there is no chance in hell that Ubisoft will actually read this. But I feel I have to post this just to get a monkey off my back.

I've bought every single Prince of Persia game dating back to the Sands of Time. The SoT trilogy ends in The Two Thrones with the Prince finally realizing that it was best to live with the consequences of using the Sands rather than fix them. It left no questions open, it tied up all loose ends, and it was a solid ending to a great story. That is where Ubisoft decides to reboot the series with a new story and a different Prince. They take a leap of faith with the new story, gameplay, and graphics. The story follows the path of this new Prince as he helps a princess named Elika defeat a dark god.

The game was simple, fun, beautiful, and the story and characters were much better than the SoT series. It had its flaws. All the more reason to have a sequel, right? Make the game better. Without spoiling anything, the game ends on a note that begs for a sequel! It left it open and prime for the next game. And by no means did it do bad. It sold about 2.2 million copies and is still out today.

Then the movie is made. This new PoP movie is based off the story of the SoT story. It will be a huge hit and earn millions. Ubisoft decides to make a new game that takes place in the SoT series. They claim it has nothing to do with the movie. Bullshit. What better way to make more money off a game by making a game that is based off the movie, which is based off the game?

Two things I'm seriously pissed off about: the first is you need to let the SoT story lay to rest. It was great, sold many copies, and had a great ending. It was done. I by no means hate the SoT games! I love the games! When I was done with The Two Thrones, I was deeply saddened that the series were over. When you get that feeling from an audience, you know you've done a good job. And you know when you need to let the legacy take its course. Rocky should of ended with Rocky II. See where I'm getting at? Don't tarnish what I love with more sequels.

Secondly, I'm pissed that it feels like they might be abandoning the new series. I have no info on whether they indeed to do this or not. While the game sold well and was praised by critics, fans were torn. Some loved the refreshed new series. Others lived in the past and wanted a reboot more like the SoT games. But what are you going to do, Ubisoft? You're going to have the girl next door slowly strip while you watch her from your own window, only for her to move away forever? No, you will not leave us people who love this new series all blue balls. You aren't making progress. You're looking to the past for game ideas when you should be looking forward.

Go ahead and release your little visit to the past. You better give us a sequel to the reboot. I will not buy this new game. I go forward. Not backwards.


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Darknet blogged
Dec 10, 09 6:59pm

I know on GameGrep there is a bit of hatred for game lists. You go in, look at the list, and you basically disagree with everything they say. I think that is because they kind of make it look like this is fact, not opinion. There is no "In my opinion" or "favorites" here. Just "this is it". And I think that is a bit wrong so I'll put it out here now: these are my opinions, these are not fact, and you can do whatever you want with the list.

Oh, and there are SPOILERS. So look out.

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Darknet blogged
Oct 05, 09 7:13pm

At the Tokyo Game Show this year, FFXIII was the talk of the show (as if you had any doubts). With it, a new trailer was released that featured the original Japanese voices. Soon after, the same trailer was released that also featured the English voices. I've read comments from articles, stuff on Neoseeker, and youtube comments. While there are a fair sum of people who like the English voices for the game, the majority was still made up of purist assholes who make comments like "I wanted to kill myself after hearing the English voices, please put the Japanese tracks on the game" or "[insert name] sounds like a fag". This is a blog entry devoted to YOU people who have ripped on video games and anime English dubs! The people who are so stuck up that you won't even give the English voices a try after seeing a 7 minute trailer. Not the people who prefer it, mind you. If you prefer the Japanese, then I'm okay with a personal preference. No, this is to the ignorant *bleep*s whose nose's are so high that they deserve to get throat punched.

First off, lets discuss why listening to the English for ENGLISH SPEAKING PEOPLE is better than the Japanese voices. The most important part is this: YOU DON'T KNOW *bleep*ING JAPANESE! The only way to understand them is to read the subtitles, which hurts the game or anime. I want to watch the cutscene and see their faces and interactions, rather than look down and read text. It hurts the game or anime by doing this. People may think "Darknet, you don't know shit about what you're saying because you don't have any experience". No, I have plenty of experience. Why I may not be the most diehard anime fan, I've watched plenty of subbed animes and this is always something I noticed.

Secondly, the way the English talk and their voices are more suited towards the English media. Look at Japanese voices: you got the low booming man, the small timid woman who sounds like a *bleep*ing chipmunk, the voices of people who you can't decide is a man or a woman, and then the heroic normal people who sound not too high and not too low. That is the Japanese voice overs in a nut shell. I swear I've heard the same voice actor in almost every Japanese dubbed anime or game I've seen. Granted people may have the same voice actors for different shows (like the English). I also do not have facts to back this up because no specific examples come to mind. Just try this: when you hear a Japanese voice that sounds like another character in another game, look up the voice actor and see if it's the same person. There exists a good chance that they aren't the same person.

Japanese voices also pretty much have the same accent. Yes there will be expections to this but there is an exception to everything in life. That doesn't make the statement false. English voices feature different tones, different accents, different styles of speaking, and all around diversity. Maybe that is why purists hate the English voices so much: less diversity means less of a chance to sound shitty. True but it will never do any better than the standard. I'd rather have that risk of it being bad because the reward of great voice acting is worth it.

Lets take a different direction and discuss something you need to understand for English voice actors: it is really *bleep*ing hard to voice for a Japanese product! Here is something that a voice actor, Japanese or English, need to do general. Sometimes they need to do a voice in a certain time with the right timing to match the mouth. In some instances, a voice actor has to do a voice of someone without knowledge of the scene or what their character is like, resulting in creating the character themselves. Other instances the voice actors will do a conversation between two characters and they won't even hear each other! How can you have a conversation when you don't even listen to the other person? All of these examples can depend on the studio but some of these factors can bear a burden on the VA.

Now combine that with the difficulties that come from doing a Japanese game. The Japanese language is radically different from the English language, making things that are said take a lot longer or shorter to say in Japanese compared to English. These actors may need to say their lines faster or stretch it out to make it fit. Why do you think in animes there may be a stupid pause in their line? Next fact is trying to align with the mouth of the Japanese original or "lip-syncing". This can be counteracted by editing the animation of the mouth, something I could tell the developers of FFXIII are working on in the English trailer. However, sometimes video game developers or anime companies don't have the time or resources to do this. Thus in order to sync with the mouth, they have to make awkward pauses or insert silly sounds of some kind to fill the gaps. Another fact is this: the Japanese have a tendency to be a bit cheesy when it comes to dialogue. This can be highly opinionated and can depend on the person but when I compare it to the style of dialogue writing for the English, it's extremely cheesy. I can see it being hard for me to say a line a cheesy line and take it seriously. Lets face it, some lines sound a lot better when you read them in subtitles compared to hearing them in English.

In conclusion, if there is one thing I hope you ignorant Japanese fanboys learn, it's this: understand how hard it is for English voice actors. While it would be nice to see what I see when I compare a sub to a dub, my last points I want to affect you the most. And that's all I got to say about that.

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Darknet blogged
Sep 10, 09 6:27pm

In high school, I was never caught up in the gossip. I kept with a close group of friends and didn't do anything stupid. The football team and basketball team players were always the center of the gossip. Did they sleep together? Are they dating? Did they break up? Does he/she like him/her? I've always hated that crap. It's honestly none of my business and why would I want to spread this crap around, even though it may not be true?

Sure enough, I've recently been caught up in the gossip and it's at my work, of all places. You may recall in my last blog entry about a girl. Well she is from my work. At work we talk to each other, what friends will usually do. So while we were hanging out, she told me "Blah came up to me today and asked if we were dating because we talk to each other". Uhhhh....okay then. So we talk to each other, thus it makes us a couple? You know what they say when you assume, right? You make an ass out of yourself.

That's all I got for today. If you gossip you deserve to get run over.

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Darknet blogged
Sep 08, 09 6:44pm

You know a girl for awhile now. You talk with this girl and hang out for about a year or so. You two seem to have the same interests and get along quite well. By association of hanging out, your other friends were to meet this girl. Your best friend only knows her for a month and she ends up liking him and vice versa. While you sit near them, you watch as these two sit close and whipser to each other. How would you react to such a thing? Would you get angry? Would you not care? Or would you get sad?

This has happened to me. My best friend instantly got a girl to like him while she never even gave me a second thought. It made me feel worthless, like there was something was wrong with me. It's so weird how what a girl thinks (or what I think she thinks of me) of me will have 100x more impact than a guy. I was angry and sad at the same time. Angry at myself for being too much of an lame ass to even get a girls attention and sad about it altogehter. In a way, I will only blame myself and no one else.

But this story does have a happy ending. Feeling that staying quiet wouldn't help, I talked with them. Sure enough, my friend told me this "You are a great person. Why do you think I hang out with you? With her...it was never meant to be because people just don't work together when it comes to dating". The girl felt awful and said she never wanted to hurt me and reassured me the same thing. I told this stuff to my parents and brother and they told me the same thing. For some reason, hearing it from my friend and girl had more of an impact then my families words. My friend told me "If you don't want me to have anything to do with her, I will. Because our friendship means more than her". I was alright with it. Who am I to deny a man at a chance of happiness?

The point: do not blame yourself for everything that goes wrong in life.

And eating a whole container of Dips will make you sick.


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Darknet blogged
Sep 03, 09 4:34pm

My parents watch Fox News everyday. Over the summer, when I stayed with my parents, I'd turn on the TV and Fox News was always one. Sometimes I'd come downstairs to see my parents watching Fox News. I sit there for about ten minutes and then I have to physically leave because I'm getting sick over what I'm watching. In order to make this as structured as possible, I'm going to make a list as to why the news sucks.

1) They never answer questions: "Tell us, do you believe that Obama's CARS program is a good idea?" "Well I think that Obama had the right intention blah blah blah blah blah". In watching the news, I've never, and I mean NEVER EVER, heard a question answered with a yes or a no. Instead, you get this long as explanation on the subject which never takes a side! They dance around the question and it's never answered! Because I hardly watch the news, I don't know if what I say applies to everyone on the news. Hell, some people may be more than willing to take a side. But it's a majority and it's bullshit. I don't see this shit as much on ESPN or G4, so why the hell should I see it with the news?

2) Way too much coverage: If there is one thing that the news is good with, it's beating a dead horse with a stick. When Chris Benoit killed his family, I saw the news reports give like a five second explanation on what happened then they will interview everyone! "Joining us is some random psychiatrist you never heard of, Dr. Nutlicker. Dr. Nutlicker, why do you think he did this?" Take that but x10. Did he do it because of the roid rage? If so, who is responsible? What will happen to that person responsible? How will this affect the world when that person responsible is found. ARRRGH!

3) They talk about shit that doesn't matter Sometimes I'll see the news get in to a discussion about celebrities and their relationships.....WTF?! I get enough of that shit from having to look at tabloids at my work. But seriously, this? Are you so short on material that you have to stoop to this level? Nobody cares about why the hell Je Aniston nnifer got dumped for the fiftieth time and if you do then you need to be shot.

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Darknet blogged
Sep 03, 09 3:35pm

This is my first, and not last, blog entry. Decided to get in to the wide world of blogging. I guess I'll use this place to rent about things. For now, I don't have anything to rant about so I'll leave you with this quote from my idol, Winston Churchill.

"I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter."

Winston Churchill

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