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hideOriginal Post

Oct 09, 11 at 12:00amGiga Bowser

* * *

The Death of Princess Luna

A FanFic by Giga Bowser

Here we have it folks! My very first My Little Pony FanFic, and my entry into the FanFic conest. I sure hope you all enjoy it.

Thanks to everybrony who voted for me in the contest!

Origin: I'm sure many of you are asking..."WHY WOULD YOU WRITE THIS?" Well, back in August, I had trouble sleeping one night, so I imagined pony scenarios to help me get to sleep. This scenario manifested itself, and I found it interesting. The next night, I had trouble sleeping again, and I returned to this scenario. Everything began to form together so flawlessly, that I had to get up and write it down. Then I had a dream about it. That cemented it: I had to turn this into fiction and...here we are.
I started writing this before Season 2 aired. I say this because Season 2, Episode 4 has a..."different" Luna.
I'm hoping that I can count on all of you to give me any comments, criticisms and corrections. I'd like to treat this thread as my beta readers. I'd like it to be as good as it can be. So don't be afraid to speak your mind.
I guess that's enough of GB babbling. Onto the story!

The Death of Princess Luna

Chapter 1: The Darkest Night

Chapter 2: Shock and Despair

Chapter 3: Vale Luna

Chapter 4: Enigma

Chapter 5: Jigsaw

Chapter 6: Ethereal Illumination

Chapter 7: Starlight

Chapter 8: Waxing Moon

Chapter 9: Waning Eclipse

Chapter 10: Veil of Darkness

Chapter 11: The Stars Will Aid Her

Chapter 12: Supernova - Part I

Chapter 13: Supernova - Part II

Chapter 14: The Shining Night

DeviantArt Page

FanFiction.net

FIMFiction

Spoiler: Art

Highlight this box with your cursor to read the spoiler text.

Princess Celestia by Giga Bowser

Sunbeam by GB with Pony Creator

Moonbeam by GB with Pony Creator

Fallen Poet by GB with Pony Creator

Thanks for reading!

Thread Recap (last 10 posts from newest to oldest)

Jul 25, 12 at 6:14pm
Superwalnut

quote hiigaran
quote Superwalnut
Wait, Strike one of three? what?
in the submission process on EqD, because they get so many submissions from people, they had to limit the number of times people can resubmit. strike one of three basically means that one of his three chances to get it featured have gone. a prereader would offer suggestions to fix certain things up within the story as well, so that the author may have a better chance of getting in a successful submission.

Ah, ok.

Jul 25, 12 at 3:45pm
hiigaran

quote Superwalnut
Wait, Strike one of three? what?

in the submission process on EqD, because they get so many submissions from people, they had to limit the number of times people can resubmit. strike one of three basically means that one of his three chances to get it featured have gone. a prereader would offer suggestions to fix certain things up within the story as well, so that the author may have a better chance of getting in a successful submission.

quote Rainbow Dash number1
youre living proof
She means the story. [/div]

Jul 25, 12 at 3:32pm
Superwalnut

Wait, Strike one of three? what?

Jul 25, 12 at 3:12pm
Rainbow Dash number1

youre living proof

She means the story.

Jul 25, 12 at 12:08pm
hiigaran

quote Princess Luna
Wait so Luna did survive right?

youre living proof

Jul 25, 12 at 12:01pm
Princess Luna

Wait so Luna did survive right? Oh and it is a very good story only better if it was revered to book version though. Cuz imma use to tht.

Jul 13, 12 at 8:51pm
Giga Bowser

Basically they've given me two options.

I can either fix the problems myself by going over it again. This would make it my fourth self-edited revision, and at this point I'm not going to be of much help to myself.

...OR, I can get an editor from /fic/ or somewhere else...to edit All Fourteen Chapters with me.

I wasn't even able to find anyone on that site who would commit to editing Three.

Jul 13, 12 at 8:10pm
KINGX2

*bleep* that person. I only read part of your story, GB (haven't finished it yet) and it was truly touching. Once again, *bleep* these kinds of people. What I hate the most is they're being kind about it, like they're giving you the finger and trying not to look like a dick about it.

Jul 13, 12 at 4:35pm
hiigaran

wtf is OOC? out of character? if so, bullshit. theres not much character to base a fic on when it comes to luna. not sure what they mean by ellipses formatting, or awkward sentence structure either.

Jul 13, 12 at 3:47pm
Giga Bowser

quote Prereader
Hello there! I just finished reading your story, “The Death of Luna”, and I’m afraid I cannot recommend this for posting at this time. Look for errors in the following areas:

*ellipses formatting
*OOC Luna
*clunky, rushed dialogue
*awkward sentence structures
*bland narration
*repetitive sentence structures

I strongly recommend bringing this to editors either on /fic/ or any other editing group of your choice. This is strike one of three. Good luck!

Sincerely, Pre-Reader XY

Yup. I just don't care anymore, folks.

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