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 Topic: MNM [2] vs [0] Mack
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 Tai MackSkirmish XL
mad messenger  total posts: 329 since: Apr 2009 |
 Nov 05, 09 at 5:00pm |
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3 rounds
20-24 lines Feeding (except round 3) 4 day time limit Let's get it crackin' bitch. This message was edited by Tai Mack on Nov 05 2009. This message was edited by Tai Mack on Nov 06 2009. This message was edited by Tai Mack on Nov 08 2009. This message was edited by Tai Mack on Nov 10 2009. ------------------- $KIRMI$H XL | |
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 M_N_M48060I'm back and better than ever.
Neo: Essential    total posts: 12217 since: Jun 2004 |
 Nov 05, 09 at 8:50pm |
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His tough act is an exposed fraud so why rap?
We all know Tai Mack is only a gangsta behind his iMac You spit filler crap so I'm embarrassin Tai's flow While my killer raps have you lookin like hookers in American Psycho I'm known as the best my stabs are exposin' ya flesh When I say "let's get it crackin'" I'm only talkin' bout the bones in ya chest! It's well known that Bull's the only one you've been associated with Because on this forum it's obvious you're mostly hated BITCH! I could clown on you all day and no one would defend you As I state "you couldn't Mac on a McDonald's menu" I don't need a gun to know that you're done but it's more fun when I put a forty five to your back like Jordan You could hit me with your strongest jabs, I'm like "that's the best ya got" While I stab with a rusty blade and call it your tetanus shot I fought toe to toe with the best and man I stayed together but Tai Mack is routinely crushed by feathers Don't ever doubt me or any of my vicious ramblings or I'll slaughter you along with your fictitious family All this time you spend tryin' to blow you're wastin it The only sponsor you could ever get is Asian Trix Make you shovel out your own grave and man you dig well Hope you can see the Big Picture because today you'll get a Big L* You'll be black and blue after I'm attacking you while your face speeds to... the ground after I toss your bitch ass off of the top of the space needle *Big L's second album was named The Big Picture | |
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Tai Mack Skirmish XL
mad messenger total posts: 329 since: Apr 2009 |
Nov 05, 09 at 9:11pm |
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You should have stayed away, disfigure the fvcking hell outta you mayne Take my razorblade, rearrange your veins until they spell out my name You'll be shelled til your brayed, so bruv, I'll hit you wit' the barret, burst your mug In fact, Smash ya wit' the barrel of my .50 cal- cos you ain't even worth the slug I'll disperse this thug into jigsaw pieces when my whole boot meets his mush You can brag about your 'grand comeback' but it's known you weak as f$ck Serious- you suck! I'll f$cking leave your face laced with imprints of car tyres Pour bleach in ya wounds after also grating your hands wit bits of gauze wire I awe inspire, while even in your pathetic 'prime' mate you failed to raise eyebrows I spit venomous, scorching hot lyrics to leave ya frame razed all both your face diced out You chose a Tai bout but didn't research or realise what your getting into Picture the image: MNM is ran through, this f@ggots blood is wetting my ginsu You'll get hit dude, rip out your spinal cord then ram it down your neck I'm without a doubt the best, now watch as my gloved fist blows out cha chest Leave blood leaking outta ya head, Mack'll expend no energy to body you I'm original, but before YOU spit we place bets on which legends you'll try to copy dude Your rhymes are hardly new, it's fact they're lame, old recycled shit It's funny how you've got dope swag, but when you start rhymin', everything is spite of it Your shite you prick, I'm hated? Your the laughing stock of the retirement home Step to me and catch a bicycle kick, now watch my shottie blow off the side of your dome Edit: Typo ------------------- $KIRMI$H XL | |
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Tai Mack Skirmish XL
mad messenger total posts: 329 since: Apr 2009 |
Nov 05, 09 at 9:12pm |
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Nice, two drops on the night that the thread was posted.
Thanks M, now let's get soem votes up in this. ------------------- $KIRMI$H XL | |
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the_REAL_zwarrior like a BAWSE!
s-e-e-k-e-r  total posts: 1729 since: Jun 2004 |
Nov 05, 09 at 11:18pm |
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Tai Whack Lyrical Stabs [0-5]:2.5 Structure [0-5]:3 Originality [0-5]:2.5 Quotable [0-1]: I'll disperse this thug into jigsaw pieces when my whole boot meets his mush You can brag about your 'grand comeback' but it's known you weak as f$ck Hard to pick from, but I like this one the best. I mean, your bars rhymed well, it's just they didn't hit. Final Assessment [0-10]:5 I liked that you came at him with multis, but they felt forced. 90 percent of your stabs were violence stabs, and unoriginal violence stabs at that. They really took away from your spit, and they weren't really set up well. In terms of rhyming structure I think you're getting a lot better, but your stabs could've been helped tremendously by mixing up the violence with some personals, of which this dude has a lot. I was expecting you to throw everything at him. But you didn't though, and it hurt you. Violence is nice, but only if set up well and its used creatively. Total [0-26]: 13 Michigan Sucks Lyrical Stabs [0-5]:3 Structure [0-5]:3 Originality [0-5]:3 Quotable [0-1]:1 I don't need a gun to know that you're done but it's more fun when I put a forty five to your back like Jordan Made me lol. Nice word play. Even though it was a violence stab, it was clever because of the meaning behind it. Final Assessment [0-10]:6 Nice flow, your stabs weren't ground shaking by any means. Everyone knocks Tai for his recently aquired family, and there were some violence stabs, which were ok, but not great either. That being said, you set them up really well, and they were much better than that of your opponents. You had some nice wordplay in there too, like in your quotable. The difference to me in this one, was your stabs were set up a lot better than Tai's. It really added to the overall value of your spit, and made it much more enjoyable to read. Total [0-26]: 16 Winner: MNM ------------------- 
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Descyphal Forbidden Lyrics Within.
ultra seeker  total posts: 1456 since: Apr 2004 |
Nov 06, 09 at 2:17am |
Bar 1: 6/10 Bar 2: 5/10 Liked the flow. The first bar was casual. Can't say I haven't seen Jecht and just about everyone else talk about computer geeks acting thug around here. Follow up bar was filler gassing. Bar 3: 8/10 Bar 4: 3/10 Bar 3, hot. Bar 4, complete turn around and says nothing except that he's hated and he's associated with his own relative. Good job on that one, bud. Bar 5: 4/10 Bar 6: 7/10 Name play... in the most obvious, terrible form. Might have even been used against him as I vaguely remember this diss thrown at him in the month of august. A gun diss that I'm actually proud of. Horray. Yeah, Jordons 45 and his back = humorously witty. Bar 7: 4/10 Bar 8: 4/10 Stabbing him til he requires needles. Gotchya. Not creative though. Saying he gets beat by the worst while you've battled the better foes. And still lost, I might add. Not a very strong diss on a dude who's "globally hated" eh'? Bar 9: 5/10 Bar 10: 4/10 I have yet to LOL at any family oriented diss at this dude. But this was so short, brief and to the point. I just pictured someone telling him he made pretend, his family. So shut up. LOL@that. The only thing he can muster lines. Nice race play, but, it could have been better. Asian trix has been used before. Additional comment to bar 9 is that, his family disses are getting old. People need to look at any given battle he's in and see like 5 of them. Bar 11: 7/10 Bar 12: 5/10 An actual hiphop album diss. Good work. Space needle flights for the suck. I heard Lupe took one of those... Hence his sentences. No but, the speeds to/needle only rhymes if you try to make it. As I'd told you on MSN. Also, this is straight up 1 line that you broke into two because you were too lazy to refine your idea. Not that it matters because if you say it all together it works. Which is why it was average for me. Total: 62/120 - 51.66% ------- *Mack* Bar 1: 6/10 Bar 2: 4/10 Liked the visuals of bar 1. Bar 2 was basic. No creativity involved. You'll pludgen him instead of shoot, because, you'd rather not spend the loot. Bleh. Bar 3: 4/10 Bar 4: 3/10 Bar 3 was an idea I used in the forum header. I assume you couldn't shake it. Bar's 3 AND 4 have super forced grammar. You'll "disperse" him into puzzle pieces.. And pour bleach after also? hmm.. Trying too hard. But, the aggression is present. Bar 5: 2/10 Bar 6: 3/10 You have a ginsu, and shouldn't have used it to dice up the pages people have given you for criticism. You're beginning to give up on stabbing and just tossing out gas attacks that talk about you being dangerous. See, there's a difference between grime and weapon lines. Grime talks about things like grenades, M's bones in your chest, my puzzle pieces, fyre's ivory chess set. Etc. You're just talking about guns and swords. Bleh. Bar 7: 4/10 Bar 8: 2/10 Cha = ya, works the same however you're trying to convey gangsterisms in text, dude. Stepping backwards now. Bar 8 is disappointing at best. Why? I'll lay it out. 1) You took the idea I have in my battle with storm(yes, you did.) and made a single bar point out veteran copying as well as placing bets about it. Sort of the same exact thing my finisher has, huh? Become original, please. But I'll give you 2 points for it because it was my idea and not yours. Bar 9: 2/10 Bar 10: 2/10 Hmm. Bar 9 was a follow up recycling jock to the previous bar. Beside this, it says nothing. Just saying he says he's dope but spits weak. This is not insulting if you have zero credibility or humor behind it. "You suck" is not enough. Bar 10, I was watching some Grindtime recently. And must say, the retirement home diss from DBD against that spaztic kid that says 'nigga' every three seconds(If i'm not mistaken) is followed by a video of F.L.O saying dumb can bicycle kick a flying pigeon. Not that I'm suggesting you bit more. But I am suggesting that the idea is unoriginal and contrary to your claim prior to this. It's like saying you're original, but you're Supercalifragilisticexpialidociously good. Zero creativity, and zero entertainment. I can't credit you for things that are NOT entertaining, or hurtful to your opponent. Total: 32/100 - 32% Favorite(s): MnM "I'm known as the best my stabs are exposin' ya flesh When I say "let's get it crackin'" I'm only talkin' bout the bones in ya chest!" I giggled. Winner: M_N_M48060 | |
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Tai Mack Skirmish XL
mad messenger total posts: 329 since: Apr 2009 |
Nov 07, 09 at 4:09pm |
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It's fact time- your the kid in this battle who's can't rhyme. A rage diss? Jaffers, Kaf, Putas and Dac also spat that line. I know fine well each and every punch that your gone do. That why I'm about to become the 2nd Mak to son you.!!!* Your the worst of the old guard, it's the most known fact, That your a fvcking bag of shit!!! Like home grown grass. Ready yaself for second place- Cos Mack won't never hesitate. To expose the fact ya just a hyped up every day featherweight. No kid remembers you- And so with a punchline I'll render you An unidentified flying object after I throw a left at you. Y'can't touch my level, split and then re-seal ya neck. The shottie will blow ya innerds out to clear your chest. You ain't saying shit when I spray the clip chief. Improve on ya looks after I kick out this pricks teeth. You may wan't a KO, well, you havn't got a fvckin' hope. I'll leave you reelin' wen I blaze like you took a couple tokes. Your nuthing, I land hammer fists to the back of your head. Rip your lungs out, hide 'em, have you tryna catch ya breath. You don't exist on the map, homie I'm ya last hope of survival. You can't 'go back' now bitch, I've just broken your spinal.
------------------- $KIRMI$H XL | |
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M_N_M48060 I'm back and better than ever.
Neo: Essential total posts: 12217 since: Jun 2004 |
Nov 08, 09 at 3:28am |
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Alright, I'm gonna do something a little different this time. Every line I spit is gonna be a direct feed off of his verse.
quote Tai MackYou try to spit against me, but instead you stammer You say I can't rhyme at least I can use grammar (for real) quote Tai MackYour simple raps are all the same you need to be more versatile Mak was a great emcee you just come with the worst of styles quote Tai MackStrip away the surface and your lines are just down to feces If I'm the grass then you're just the *bleep*in' ground beneath me quote Tai MackI laughed just seeing you think you could win verse me The only way you'd be first if you looked at it inversely quote Tai MackIf you kept it close in this battle you'd still revel because the only thing unidentified here is your skill level quote Tai MackWow this bar just proves that your naught but an ass clown It's clear the best chest diss was the one I spit last round quote Tai MackI can't believe I'm even reading such a dense spit This nonsense bitch couldn't get to my teeth if he were a dentist quote Tai MackYou say I won't knock you out but there's never been doubt That'd you be the one on the ground failin' to answer the ten count quote Tai MackAnother generic bar that's just violence and no wit We all just shake our head at your lines is silent revulsion quote Tai MackIf were off the map in the jungle this time I'll pounce you In the game of survival you'd be voted out at tribal council | |
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Jaffers Jay Homicide
Seeketh Maximus   total posts: 5429 since: Feb 2005 |
 Nov 08, 09 at 5:06am |
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Tai:
It's fact time- your the kid in this battle who's can't rhyme. A rage diss? Jaffers, Kaf, Putas and Dac also spat that line. Bar 1: 5/10 Hmm saying someone can't rhyme when they just beat you in the previous round, not a great way to form a logical attack. Kinda saved the bar with the little flip. I know fine well each and every punch that your gone do. That why I'm about to become the 2nd Mak to son you.!!!* Bar 2: 3/10 Brush up on your English skills a little bit, some errors here. Also me and Desc spoke to you about the Mak/son you bit, so you know our opinions on how it just doesn't fit. Good idea to refrence something from his past, just next time find a better way to do it. Your the worst of the old guard, it's the most known fact, That your a fvcking bag of shit!!! Like home grown grass. Bar 3: 1/10 Ok, fact and grass don't rhyme to start with. Plus the second part of the bar doesn't even make sense, if you mean it as the weed sense I gotta tell your most of it is home grown in a sense, so that makes that bit silly. Or if its about actual green grass that cows eat, well mine isn't shit, it's actually grass so yeah, you lost me on that one. Ready yaself for second place- Cos Mack won't never hesitate. To expose the fact ya just a hyped up every day featherweight. Bar 4: 4/10 Callin' someone a featherweight is such a played out diss atm, plus whilst your in the feather bracket its kinda hard to get a laugh out of someone for being one. Kinda like a one armed man mocking another one armed man if you will. No kid remembers you- And so with a punchline I'll render you An unidentified flying object after I throw a left at you. Bar 5: 2/10 Hmmm potential for a good idea, but you really didn't word it well. Was just violent, with no real means to it. Also the fact everyone was like 'Oh shit M's back' when he returned makes the first part of the bar redundent. Y'can't touch my level, split and then re-seal ya neck. The shottie will blow ya innerds out to clear your chest. Bar 6: 2/10 Violence for the sake of violence again, also the hell you'll split and re-seal his neck, that doesn't even make sense in a battle. "Yo I'll stab you ... Then feel bad will stitch it up and make sure you're alright", weird. You ain't saying shit when I spray the clip chief. Improve on ya looks after I kick out this pricks teeth. Bar 7: 2/10 More violence, with no real twist or idea behind it. You gotta use it in a smart way, you can't just come out and spit 1001 I'll punch/stab/kick/shoot you bars and expect to score high. You may wan't a KO, well, you havn't got a fvckin' hope. I'll leave you reelin' wen I blaze like you took a couple tokes. Bar 8: 3/10 Heh can't say the bar left much of an impression, but hey at least you made an attempt to put some creativity with the meta. Your nuthing, I land hammer fists to the back of your head. Rip your lungs out, hide 'em, have you tryna catch ya breath. Bar 9: 4/10 First bar was just violence again, second bar almost came across as nice, but you made one mistake. If you hide his lungs he'd be tryna find his last breath, if you ran off with them, then he'd be tryna catch it. You don't exist on the map, homie I'm ya last hope of survival. You can't 'go back' now bitch, I've just broken your spinal. Bar 10: 3/10 Again not a great bar, he is on the map he was a former Topical Champ if memory serves me right. Plus again as I said earlier he took you in the first round, don't pass someone who just took a round of you as not on the map, it doesn't paint a good picture of yourself. Total: 29/100 MNM: You try to spit against me, but instead you stammer You say I can't rhyme at least I can use grammar (for real) Bar 1: 6/10 Not sure where the stammer bit came from, but hahaha for the second line, his grammar is a bit whack, as I said in his vote. Your simple raps are all the same you need to be more versatile Mak was a great emcee you just come with the worst of styles Bar 2: 5/10 Nice, I called him on his just plain use of violence, think you could've put the second line in a better way to give it more of a harsh punch. Strip away the surface and your lines are just down to feces If I'm the grass then you're just the *bleep*in' ground beneath me Bar 3: 4/10 Heh can't say I felt much for this line, I think you could've worked the feed a lot better than you did. I laughed just seeing you think you could win verse me The only way you'd be first if you looked at it inversely Bar 4: 5/10 Haha like the whole look at something inverse idea, verse me felt a bit off, since really you'd say verses me, so that made the flow kinda off to me. If you kept it close in this battle you'd still revel because the only thing unidentified here is your skill level Bar 5: 5/10 Again the wording came off a bit weird to me, I liked the flip on it though which made up for the wording issues I had with it. Wow this bar just proves that your naught but an ass clown It's clear the best chest diss was the one I spit last round Bar 6: 4/10 Whack first line imo, calling him an ass clown just seemed kinda mehish. Your chest diss in your last round was dope, so yeah was a clean nice feed. I can't believe I'm even reading such a dense spit This nonsense bitch couldn't get to my teeth if he were a dentist Bar 7: 6/10 Haha quite liked this bar, his spit does seem to be a kinda one track theme. You say I won't knock you out but there's never been doubt That'd you be the one on the ground failin' to answer the ten count Bar 8: 4/10 Heh, another lackluster bar, just saying you're going to KO him back doesn't really hit me as a great shot to take, especially in the simple way you put it. Another generic bar that's just violence and no wit We all just shake our head at your lines is silent revulsion bar 9: 3/10 Can't say I liked this bar, you've already come at him how his verses are one track, so really you calling him for it again kinda makes your verse seem the same. If were off the map in the jungle this time I'll pounce you In the game of survival you'd be voted out at tribal council Bar 10: 5/10 Heh it's an alright bar, nothing to write home about though. Good links with the whole jungle/pounce/tribal council, other than that can't say much on the bar. Total: 47/100 Winner: M_N_M48060 -------------------  A I'm Lifted B I'm Twisted C I'm Sick And Sadistic | |
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M_N_M48060 I'm back and better than ever.
Neo: Essential total posts: 12217 since: Jun 2004 |
Nov 10, 09 at 12:17am |
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Thanks Jaff for the vote, I'd appreciate one more since we know a third won't be needed.
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Dutch Samurai ----<----<@
Still Seekin'  total posts: 3283 since: Aug 2002 |
Nov 10, 09 at 2:37am |
Bar 1: 2/10 Bar 2: 3/10 Bar 1 was too basic. As I've told you countless times before, you need to be more creative and not just make bland statements that happen to rhyme. Bar 2 showed a little more creativity with the personal, but wasn't golden by any stretch. It probably would have held more weight in your round 1. But because you already lost one round to him, saying you'll son him, doesn't make much sense. Bar 3: 4/10 Bar 4: 4/10 Unlike Jaff, I got what you were saying in bar 3. And I didn't think it was all that bad for what it was. Note to Jaff; cannabis is often referred (reeferred?) to as "shit." (E.g. "Maaaaaan, that is some gooooood shit!" or "Pass that shit to the left!") Again, this isn't a show-stopping bar but, at least I'm seeing some degree of creativity and comparison. It was a bit generic, though. Bar 4 I was feeling some intensity and I liked the structure, but the actual diss is generic and unoriginal. Bar 5: 5/10 Bar 6: 4/10 Bar 5, I actually kind of liked. Calling him a U.F.O. after throwing a punch at him was creative. And I liked the structure of the set-up, however, to be honest, most cats here know who M is whether they want to or not, so to say no one remembers him is just plain not true. Bar 6 was standard violent filler. And again, unlike Jaff, I understood the concept of the first line of it. Basically slitting his throat then sadistically stitching it up to torture him and keep him alive just so you can blow him away with a shotgun. But like he said, you can't just keep spitting lyrics that are simply violent for the sake of being violent. A rap battle isn't a slasher movie. Some lines like that are ok, but you can't overuse them. If uou do use them, though I advise you to look at som of Facts' old battles. Faction was a master of being "creatively violent." He added a lot of dark humor and used good wordplay to come up with some really great lines. Bar 7: 3/10 Bar 8: 4/10 Bar 7 another standard "I'll hurt you line." Bar 8 was a slight improvement but weed similies have been done to death. Bar 9: 5/10 Bar 10: 3/10 Bar 9 was decent but the wording could have been better. Like Jaff said, if you said you were to run away with his lungs, the bar would have worked better. But this type of line is similar to the type Faction does, so keep at it. Bar 10 was rather weak as a closer. If you claim to intentionally sever his vertebral column, you can't call yourself his "Hope for survival" unless you were trying to be ironic. It would have worked better if you said he had no hope for survival or "too bad I'm your only "hope for survival." Total: 37/100 37% ------- *MnM* Okay... I'm going to preface this vote by saying that directly feeding off every line is a cheap tactic after having beat the man squarely in round one. It's tantamount to having the guy in a corner the wall and using the same bitch-smack against the wall move over and over again, without giving him chance to retaliate. But, being a man who has played several fighting games, it can be an effective one esspecially if done correctly... Let's see how effective M was, shall we? Bar 1: 6/10 Bar 2: 4/10 Bar one was a good feed. But not perfect. Good personal jab. But you imply that him saying that you can't rhyme is true. It would have been better if your second line was something like this; "Not only can I rhyme, Tai, but I can also use grammar. (fvcking illiterate...)." I'm going to say that same thing about your second bar as I did about his first, it's got to be more creative that that. It's a bland statement that happens to rhyme, tantamount to saying Makiavellii was good, but you suck, Tai. Needed some re-working. Bar 3: 6/10 Bar 4: 5/10 I thought bar 3 was a good flip. However, "down to" is grammatically a little awkward. To keep the rhyme you should have just said "brown feces." I know it's nit-picking, but if all you're doing is flips on his lines, they should all be solid gold. And as a side note, it is an accurate metaphor... as you (the grass) are feeding off him (the ground) for your own benefit... I digress. Bar 4 was good too, though it should have been "versus" not "verse." I liked the fact that you didn't even mention the fact he called you a featherweight, as it could have been a trap that would have made it seem like you were on the defensive. Offensive flips are always better. Good idea, but it could have been a little more stinging. Just twist that glove a little more a the end of your jabs. Bar 5: 4/10 Bar 6: 5/10 The idea behind bar 5 needed to be reworked... "Unidentified" isn't the same as "non-existent." Also the first line as a lead in didn't make sense. Maybe something like... I'm killing you out of mercy, Tai, as opposed to me hatin' you Cuz 'Unidentified' can be applied to any emcee here who, skill-wise, you even relate to ~Dutch Bar 6 was an improvement. The first line wasn't all that creative, but you had a good flip. Your chest bar in your first spit was a better bar than his. Bar 7: 6/10 Bar 8: 4/10 Bar 7 was on point... Mediocre first line but a decent set up for the "dentist" punch. Bar 8 was a lackluster attempt to flip his KO line. You basically answered his "I'm gonna knock you out, man!!" with "No, man, I'm gonna knock you out! So there!" The visual of him on the ground as the bell rings was cool and all but the bar really needed something more to it. Bar 9: 2/10 Bar 10: 5/10 Bar 9 was a total dud. It didn't rhyme and the late Olympian diver Gregg Louganis in his current state can do better flips than that. And your grammar in the second line is fvcked up. (You mean "in silent revulsion.") The finisher was a definite improvement. It had some good "Survivor" metas, but didn't hit hard at all. But overall, you played off his spit well enough to take the win. You take -10 honor points, though, for the cheap win. Total: 47/100 47% Favorite(s): Strip away the surface and your lines are just down to feces If I'm the grass then you're just the *bleep*in' ground beneath me ~MnM I can't believe I'm even reading such a dense spit This nonsense bitch couldn't get to my teeth if he were a dentist ~MnM No kid remembers you- And so with a punchline I'll render you An unidentified flying object after I throw a left at you ~Tai Winner: MnM ------------------- S'all about 'dat paper...  Now with 50% more defness | |
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M_N_M48060 I'm back and better than ever.
Neo: Essential total posts: 12217 since: Jun 2004 |
Nov 10, 09 at 2:46am |
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Thanks for the vote Dutch, Fyre sends this to the graveyard!
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Tai Mack Skirmish XL
mad messenger total posts: 329 since: Apr 2009 |
Nov 10, 09 at 4:13pm |
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Thanks for the battle M.
I don't think I spat particularly well but I feel I've learned alot from this battle. Thanks for the votes guys. ------------------- $KIRMI$H XL | |
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