LA Noire Game Reveiw

Grand Theft Auto: LA is a 2011 game released for the xbox 360 and PS3 and developed by Rockstar Games, it takes references from the film noire genre and incorporates the never before seen Motion Capture technology which takes 32 different angles of an actors face to realistically portray their facial expressions in game.

As I am quite involved in the loop of the gaming industry (IGN employee here!) and highly anticipated this game for 7 years. I was quite disappointed, if not stupefied by the whole premise of this game. GTA IV was a classic, the expansions were even more fulfilling and I have never had so much fun with a sandbox game.

The sheer audacity that Rockstar Games has shown by advertising this as a GTA game has almost entirely ruined the franchise for me completely, but more of that down below.

Story

First thing you start off as a cop and then you mindlessly complete the same level 20 something times, congratulations you win the game. I think the main character was in the Vietnam War or something because all the cut scenes are always in a jungle, I mean the game is set in 1940 something this doesn’t even make any sense!

Gameplay (IF ANY LOL)

This is a good game.

Press X if I am telling the truth

Press Square if you doubt me

Press Triangle if I am lying

If you pressed Triangle then where is the proof that I am lying.

0/1 correct


In EVERY GTA games to date you can murder anyone you please, steal any car you please and well, commit any crime in general you please (as long as the programmers included it (you can not expose yourself to a 12 year old for example)).
Can you do any of this in GTA: LA? The answer is no.

I mean the gun that you own, being a cop and everything, only materialises when danger is afoot (usually after some lame cut scene which I never payed attention to) and Rockstar Games have actually built the engine of the game so that pedestrians are almost impossible to run over! They literally dive 11 meters out of the way when you drive 10 meters near them and to top it all off, you no longer steal cars but you commandeer them while showing your police badge instead of punching them in the face and throwing them out of the car.

The Gameplay really made me hate this game, it is so repetitive and pointless. That annoying sound effect when you come close to a clue only to pick it up and be a beer bottle or a cup or something else irrelevant with the main character saying something mundane like “hmm, its irrelevant” made me

Press Power Button to end mindlessly boring game

1/1 correct



The main characters name is Michael Phelps or something and he is one big dumbass. He begins his career as some idiot cop then through plot holes and ridiculous impossibilities he makes it to the homicide squad (or should I say HOMOcide squad lol?) where he solves murders willy-nilly regardless of if his interrogation methods are successful or not.

After bumbling around and shooting the Black Dahlia killer (not subduing him as is usually required but most police (in the Western world at least)) he is promoted to Vice where he engages in some off camera sexual relations with some cynical German bitch.

This is at like level 17 or something. So you play as Michael Phelps making your way up the police ranks but thanks to some unavoidable boring tailing mission you are implied to have had sex with this German bitch and are demoted to Arson squad.

Read that last paragraph again ^

The main reason games are so enjoyable is because they are rewarding in some sense, whether or not it be points or progression through levels. Playing a game and having no way out of being told “Even if you did solve all the murders you were ever assigned to, and you solved them admirably, you suck at everything, now play the rest of the game as a washed up cop walking around burnt houses” makes you wonder ‘why am I still playing this game?’ A couple of levels later you finish the game and win, or lose depending on if you are an idiot or not and actually liked this game.
(Michael Phelps dies in the end which was a stalemate for me.)


Conclusion

This game was… well, not even really a game.
I can only hope GTA: V will not use the same engine or concept found in GTA: LA.
What will be next? Grand Theft Auto V: Motor Vehicle Theft Investigation?

I give this game 0/5 correct questions answered.

Hi ahoy0!

I know this response is a little bit late, but if you're still around it appears you've completely wound up in the wrong place!

It's great that you've wanted to contribute a review to Neoseeker, but sadly this forum is for the Playstation 1 - not for L.A. Noire! If you want to submit a user review for L.A. Noire (and I'm presuming you have it on Playstation 3!) you can do that here.

However, I've just had a quick skim over your review. It seems you have several misconceptions in regards to the game. It is not called Grand Theft Auto: LA, it is jut called L.A. Noire and has absolutely nothing to do with the Grand Theft Auto series at all. Furthermore, Rockstar did not actually develop this game - Team Bondi did, with support and resources from Rockstar where needed, because Rockstar were the publishers (not developers!). If you are interested in resubmitting your review to Neo, try to bare this in mind as it seems a lot of your review focuses on Grand Theft Auto, which is irrelevant.

Thanks for your time!