Dating: Asking, Conflicts, Tips 26 - Page 11

Okay, because if I asked HER out she would know I DO like her. Thanks Too bad schools not until monday -.-

Ok this might be a long story so bear with me, as I need to start from the start.

When I started High school I made friends with this guy, (LLoyd), he eventually became my closest friend. We would talk a lot and hang out a lot. Now he always talked about this girl from his primaru school, Krissy.

I never talked to krissy, up until about the end of year 7, she was really nice and we talked a lot. i meet some of her friends and they were really nice and eventually we formed a mini-group of about four people. This group did not contain LLoyd by the way.

the four of us went to the movies a few times and just hung around. yet now I really like Krissy, if you don't catch my drift i wanna go out with her.

yet by this time LLoyd has changed immensely, he made friends with otherr people and is quite frankly an idiot and iif I could, I would use more offensive words. We are barely friends anymore.

yet somehow krissy manages to end up liking him and because we are hgreat friends she tells me.

My question is, should I continue to wait for Krisys to stop liking LLoyd, or should I just try and move on?

The thing is, if he tells her how he feels, he might lose his friendship with her depending on how she feels about it, and what kind of person she is. How old are you? Personally I think you should try and move on and date other people. If she ends it with Lloyd and you still like her, then you should go for it.
Or, you could just not date anyone else and wait it out. Be there for her as a good friend, if Lloyd is the idiot you say he is she'll probably come looking for a shoulder to cry on at times, and she might end up developing feelings for you. Its a long shot, but if you really like this girl, theres nothing to lose by doing it that way.

The thing is, just trying to forget about it and date other people is easier said than done, if all he wants to do is be with her. I wouldn't say it was so much 'waiting around', more so concentrating on being a good friend? Hrm. I don't know ._.;

I have a question, is Lloyd dating her yet? If not I say swoop in and explain to her how you feel about her when you're on your own together, because then at least if she still wants to be with Lloyd you'll feel better for letting the feelings out. Whenever I tell anyone anything that I really didn't want to tell them, even if it upsets them or anything, it makes me feel better for finally getting it out of my system.

Maw4r, why were you as 'cold as ice'.? And what exactly do you mean by that? Were you unable to chat to her? Were you scared or nervous? And why? Was it a lack of confidence or something else?

You sound very much like a younger version of me. I used to have very similar problems - a lack of confidence which led to me constantly joking and insulting people (jokingly) in conversation.

Of course I still do that now but only for fun.

The problem is the fear of rejection. You're nervous and you lack confidence because you think the girl will reject you. But she's more likely to reject you because you're nervous and you lack confidence. I had the same problem while I was in school.

The thing to realise is that rejection doesn't matter. It's an unfortunate truth but not every woman you ask will say yes. Hell, I've been rejected far too many times to count but the women always take it more personally than I do...

Get rid of your fear of rejection and you'll loosen up a bit and be able to chat to the girls a little more. Which will, in turn, help your lack of confidence.

As for actually getting rid of the fear of rejection, I can't really help you there. You have to realise that being rejected by a girl doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. There are hundreds of reasons why she might say no - none of which have anything to do with you.

Alright, so my boyfriend and I [[long distance of 7 months]] get along... okay. Well, when we talk we're absolutely great. The thing is, beside that. It's hard with him not living here. The thing is, he loves hanging out with his friends. So much, he's practically never home. Well, not exactly. He's out until about 8ish on week days except for Tuesday. Most [[I'd say 9//10]] weekends he's out at a friend's. Now I get it, he loves hanging out with his friends. It's just when he gets home, he's so tired we talk for a couple of minutes and that's it. Or, he'll call me at 1 AM on a school night and I'm so beat from the day, it sucks.

I've tried explaining to him that I don't want him to stop going out [[which is the conclusion he immediately jumped to at my telling him this]] but that I feel so left out of his life. It's kind of... he goes out, and knows I'll be home to talk to when he gets back. I don't go out with my friends much, so he's right. I just feel kind of like an after-thought.

I know we wouldn't have this problem if he lived here because well I'm friends with all of his friends, and I know I [[well, probably]] would be invited along. If not, he'd always be over here, I know it. He's not a bad boyfriend, but he can't understand how I feel about this. He doesn't understand that when he goes out for days and we talk for a couple of minutes that I feel so neglected for lack of a better word.

Any advice? Sorry this was so long. =P

LeoPup19, you could always try not being always so available for him. You could just fake being busy enough (or really busy yourself with something, doesn't matter) so he realizes that he wants to spend some more time with you. Just an idea.


yoeunsanedude, if you feel that you are going to fast then yes you are. Well, for your own comfort that is. There is no set rules for when you do what with someone and what defines a relationship as going "too fast" but there is also no problem with slowing things down if you want to. If you feel uncomfortable just tell her and suggest doing more things where you get to know each other more that won't lead to sex.