re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship? - Page 3 - Thinker's Lounge

Forum Options:	my.neoforum register members prefs search faq

Topic: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship? Options: Print subscribe remove NeoPM
Threads List « Next Newest Next Oldest »
Another_Mutant aka the Evil Storyteller true seeker (2K Remix) total posts: 2150 since: Aug 2002	Mar 23, 12 at 2:44am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	Log in to remove this sponsored message I don't think that it should, but I think there are times that it will. Some religions work to isolate their members from non-believers. If one partner is a devout member of one of these, it is going to have an effect. If one partner has family members who are devout members of one of these, the effect might be more limited, but there is going to be a fair amount of stress there. quote Turkagent How can you honestly peacefully be happy in a relationship if you truly and utterly believe your partner is destined to go to hell? This I think would be a big showstopper. If one partner is a devout believer in a religion that teaches the other partner is going to hell, how do they live with that? Other than that, yes... the more different your beliefs are the more stress will come of it, but that is reduced by lower levels of devoutness or religious conviction. For example, people who stay in a religion for social rather than belief reasons aren't going to be as bothered by a partner who stays in a different religion for social reasons.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
D-G BANG CruisiN' total posts: 22187 since: Mar 2003	Mar 23, 12 at 4:06pm ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	All I can say is, I would prefer not to be involved with anyone who had bizarre beliefs of any kind. And to me, that includes all religious beliefs. But then again I've never really been in a relationship so I'm no expert. -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
KR_1250 Custom Title Goes Here. Neolithic total posts: 6280 since: Apr 2006	Mar 26, 12 at 12:07am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote DG All I can say is, I would prefer not to be involved with anyone who had bizarre beliefs of any kind. And to me, that includes all religious beliefs. But then again I've never really been in a relationship so I'm no expert. Thats kinda dissapointing. I'd expect some (a small proportion of) faithists to say they would not date an atheist. But not the other way round. An true Atheist or thinking Agnostic has little to lose from dating a person of faith.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
D-G BANG CruisiN' total posts: 22187 since: Mar 2003	Mar 26, 12 at 4:27am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote KR_1250 An true Atheist or thinking Agnostic has little to lose from dating a person of faith. Not true. We have sanity to lose. Now obviously this isn't the case for "anyone who has any kind of belief at all". As in "I have a vague feeling that there's something out there." But I really meant for those who have relatively strong specific beliefs, who let them affect their day to day lives. I wouldn't be amused if I was with someone who insisted on saying prayers, thanking god for things which humans did, etc. Frankly, I would be doubting their sanity. Imagine living with someone who insists that invisible purple unicorns are real and talk to them. To me, all religious beliefs are just as bizarre and insane as believing in invisible purple unicorns. We usually lock people up who claim to talk to those. -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
KR_1250 Custom Title Goes Here. Neolithic total posts: 6280 since: Apr 2006	Mar 26, 12 at 6:03am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote DG quote KR_1250 An true Atheist or thinking Agnostic has little to lose from dating a person of faith. Not true. We have sanity to lose. Now obviously this isn't the case for "anyone who has any kind of belief at all". As in "I have a vague feeling that there's something out there." But I really meant for those who have relatively strong specific beliefs, who let them affect their day to day lives. I wouldn't be amused if I was with someone who insisted on saying prayers, thanking god for things which humans did, etc. Frankly, I would be doubting their sanity. Imagine living with someone who insists that invisible purple unicorns are real and talk to them. To me, all religious beliefs are just as bizarre and insane as believing in invisible purple unicorns. We usually lock people up who claim to talk to those. Well, obviously we all have an instinct where we'd consider a potential partners sanity or state of mental well being before dating them. Now, im also an atheist, but there is a massive jump from being religious to being insane. Like you, i would not be involved with someone who asked me to pray, or involve myself in their faith. But if they were able to keep their opinions and beliefs to themselves and local religious community i'd have no issue. I dont see what issue there could possibly be, unless you are just judging someone for what they believe regardless of wither it affects you or not. A position i cant possibly support and one of my major critisisms of religion itself. I get it if you dont want to date an Islamic fundementalist or bible belt christian bigot. But refusing to date a person based on their beliefs is something i cant ever support. You also posed the question of living with people who have extreme beliefs. My mates GF believes in power crystals, horoscopes and paganism, but she's a great girl and doesnt force these beliefs on anyone even though theyu are complete fantasy. Whats wrong there ? My ex believed in faries... literally diminuative humanoids with fecking wings, mental i know, but it never once figured into our relationship and we made it 5 years without the issue ever complicating our daily lives. Her being a c*nt did that. I agree that there is a limit, no-one wants to date a member of the westboro baptist church, or Al Q'uaeda. But letting a standard faith stand in the way of a relationship COULD BE wasting the best oppertunity you ever had. Not worth it. As i said, the faithists potentially have much more to lose in that situation.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
D-G BANG CruisiN' total posts: 22187 since: Mar 2003	Mar 26, 12 at 6:41am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	Well, that's the thing. I wouldn't want to be around someone who believes in fairies. Because I'd think they were nuts. Just imagine for a moment being in a relationship with someone who actually has an actual recognised mental disorder. Would you be OK with that? Technically you could miss out on a relationship with a really wonderful person, but if they are a schizophrenic, I imagine it would be... awkward to say the least. When it comes to people thinking they communicate with a deity on a daily basis, I see this as basically being schizophrenia. Talking to invisible men. Obviously someone just thinking "maybe a greater power made the world but doesn't actually interfere with human lives at all or talk to us ever" is less of a problem. -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
KR_1250 Custom Title Goes Here. Neolithic total posts: 6280 since: Apr 2006	Mar 26, 12 at 7:19am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote DG Well, that's the thing. I wouldn't want to be around someone who believes in fairies. Because I'd think they were nuts. Just imagine for a moment being in a relationship with someone who actually has an actual recognised mental disorder. Would you be OK with that? Technically you could miss out on a relationship with a really wonderful person, but if they are a schizophrenic, I imagine it would be... awkward to say the least. When it comes to people thinking they communicate with a deity on a daily basis, I see this as basically being schizophrenia. Talking to invisible men. Obviously someone just thinking "maybe a greater power made the world but doesn't actually interfere with human lives at all or talk to us ever" is less of a problem. LOL, your talking to the wrong guy. I have a long history of mental problems and depression in my family including schizophrenia. I myself am susceptable to both. Also, most schozophrenics are not "insane" and many live relatively normal lives, you might even know one or two. Also, that girl with the faries ? She got a masters degree in English, politics and social sciences. She's a complete nutball, but not clinically insane, and definately not mentally incapable. Maybe insane isnt the right word ? But to be fair i do catch your drift... I just think your linking religious belief with insanity is a big leap. a very big leap. Insane people are by definition incapable of leading a normal succesful life due to their state and degree of mental instability. Most religious people do not fit this category. To be honest your issue seem to be purely idiological. If thats teh case, i dont agree personally, but wouldnt ever tell you your wrong.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
Styot Gott mit uns Neo or Bust total posts: 7243 since: Feb 2007	Mar 26, 12 at 10:18am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote KR_1250 LOL, your talking to the wrong guy. Schizophrenia/split personality pun? -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
D-G BANG CruisiN' total posts: 22187 since: Mar 2003	Mar 26, 12 at 10:22am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	Well I'm not exactly saying that it IS insanity. Just that it's similar in many ways. Religious thinking is actually now known to be a by-product of how the human mind evolved. It's how babies think when they don't know any better, according to NewScientist magazine. My point is that people should know better when they grow up. If they don't, it's worrying. And yes I know some people myself who have schizophrenia. But while they're decent people who I'm friendly with online, I wouldn't be comfortable being in a close relationship with them in person. (One of them says that they hear voices telling them to kill people. I think you can understand why I would be wary.) Frankly, I don't understand why people see religion as being any different to other things... Such as people having imaginary friends when they're an adult. You'd get weird looks for that. Or insisting that you're accompanied everywhere by an 8 foot tall invisible rabbit called Dave. Or insisting that you serve an invisible magical being called Marty the Underpants Gnome. While Marty would provide a good explanation for where missing clothing goes when it should be in the washing machine, people would think you were completely nuts for believing in him. And yet this is exactly what religion does. Provides outlandish explanations for unexplainable events (or events that that individual can't explain but other people could). Would you be comfortable being in a relationship with someone who prayed to Marty the Underpants Gnome on a daily basis and insisted on sacrificing underpants to him once a week? Be honest. -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
JaGx Reward if found. just getting started! total posts: 131 since: Feb 2005	Mar 28, 12 at 3:46am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	I have had an experience with my ex about her religion. She was a christian and she always talked about god and whatnot, I didn't mind as long she didn't expect me to follow it and go to church. It did get annoying as weeks went by cause she would start judging me and say how I would end up in hell for the choices I made. The first time we were going to have sex she started to cry cause she said "I don't want to sin" so I left it alone. Though the next day we had sex. Anyway some people do let their religious beliefs stand in the way of their relationship and some don't. I'm open minded and I wouldn't care about my partnes religious beliefs as long they didn't start judging me with it. Thankfully my girlfriend right now is not religious at all so its a win for me. -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
Live Light true seeker (2K Remix) total posts: 2111 since: Oct 2007	Mar 28, 12 at 6:42pm ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	DG, I hope you realize how uncaring, self-centered, narrow-minded, and arrogant you sound when you say things like that. No, I would not have a problem with being in a relationship with someone who was "schizophrenic." In fact, I would do everything I could to help them. You don't even seem willing to do that much. You say it would be "awkward," and that, quite frankly, is totally selfish and downright heartless. Furthermore, what you're saying seems to imply that all religious people are schizophrenic and insane and somehow have a lower IQ than the rest of the world. This is completely absurd, and I actually expected better, even from you.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
KR_1250 Custom Title Goes Here. Neolithic total posts: 6280 since: Apr 2006	Mar 29, 12 at 2:23am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote DG Would you be comfortable being in a relationship with someone who prayed to Marty the Underpants Gnome on a daily basis and insisted on sacrificing underpants to him once a week? Be honest. Honestly ? How big are her tits ? Nah, but being serous, i wouldnt mind as long as her mental beliefs didnt have practical and tangible effects on our relationship. Thats all i care about, she can pray to the cookie monster and Big bird if she likes. Like i said my ex believed in astroLogy and horoscopes which for me are the most bizarre and stupid things which regular every day people believe in. They are much more difficult to justify than believing in gnomes, faries or god for me, depending on your definition of god. it didnt bother me though as she never forced those beliefs on me and i know absolutely 100% that it isnt real... which is more than i can say for absolute sure regarding god... again depending on definition. In a way im with ya though. I choose my words carefully here. I dont find religious people to be mental, or insane or mentally disturbed, but I share your confusion as to their motivation and capability for faith. Like yourself, I cant get my head around the fact that intellegent adults believe some of the aspects of organised religion and i have to constantly remind my self that it is not a joke and people REALLY DO believe some of it. I also have to remind myself these people are not insane or mental, because in honesty they arnt, Infact it actually makes me uncomfortable that people of such high intellegence (way more than me) CAN believe some aspects of religion. I just dont get it. I dont get surprised that people believe in some sort of cellestial beings or intellegent consciousnesses way more developed and advanced than ours, even ones which somehow seem supernatural, but anything more than that always surprises me no matter how many times i hear it. I'd never lose a good thing because of it though, or miss a nice pair of double D's.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
D-G BANG CruisiN' total posts: 22187 since: Mar 2003	Mar 29, 12 at 4:10am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote Live Light Furthermore, what you're saying seems to imply that all religious people are schizophrenic and insane and somehow have a lower IQ than the rest of the world. This is completely absurd, and I actually expected better, even from you. Religion is exactly as sane as believing in Marty the invisible underpants gnome. Would you or would you not happily live with someone who insisted that Marty was real and must be appeased with underpants once every full moon? How about if on a weekly basis they tried to convert you to worship Marty and give up your worldly underpants for his greater glory? quote You don't even seem willing to do that much. You say it would be "awkward," and that, quite frankly, is totally selfish and downright heartless. Have you been in a relationship with a schizophrenic who hears voices telling them to kill you? I'm guessing not. quote No, I would not have a problem with being in a relationship with someone who was "schizophrenic." In fact, I would do everything I could to help them. This statement means that you are sure their invisible friends are not real and you think they are nuts. If I said the same thing about God, you'd get mad. Why do you feel it is OK to assume a schizophrenic's internal voices are not real, and treat them as such, but you have to treat religious beliefs like something more? What if, to parallel your example, I got into a relationship with a Christian and then spent all my time trying to "help them" by convincing them that God isn't real? KR_1250 Yeah I'm basically the same. Perhaps it's not fair to say religious people are insane. But I'm saying that functionally they're acting the same as if they were. Doing utterly bizarre things. Making illogical statements with no basis in evidence. Insisting on odd rituals. I would find their BEHAVIOUR would make me uncomfortable. The mental basis behind it isn't the issue. Someone who literally never brought up the subject or acted on it wouldn't be a problem although there would still be the issue of me accidentally pissing them off somehow. Anyway Live Light I look forward to your explanation for why believing in Marty the underpants gnome would be crazy while believing in God is sane. Edit: Mar 29, 12 4:21am -------------------
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
AnonymousGuy Pastamancing like a pro Neolithic total posts: 6420 since: Nov 2005	Mar 29, 12 at 6:16am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote DG Have you been in a relationship with a schizophrenic who hears voices telling them to kill you? I'm guessing not. Most schizophrenics aren't violent. My room mate/best friend's girlfriend is schizophrenic. I've been there during her "episodes" and we've all talked at length about what she experiences. Though she occasionally has bouts of paranoia during her episodes her paranoia is always turned outward (at non-existent imaginary strangers she feels are threatening our home) and never inward towards myself, her boyfriend, or the other two roommates whom she feels very protective of during her episodes. She's an absolute sweetheart and he loves her to death even though there's pretty good odds she will have to be hospitalized for her own good. quote DG Not true. We have sanity to lose. Strongly atheist leaning agnostic here (I guess you nitpickers out there would call me a weak atheist) currently in a relationship with a christian. Not only do I find her refreshingly non bigoted or judgmental (gay best friend, fairly liberal minded, never once shoved her religious beliefs down my throat and I basically had to prod her to get her to even discuss her religious beliefs at all) but she's incredibly intelligent, absolutely not insane, and in no danger of driving myself insane any time soon. Which brings me to the following point. quote DG All I can say is, I would prefer not to be involved with anyone who had bizarre beliefs of any kind. And to me, that includes all religious beliefs. ^ This absolutely explains why: quote DG But then again I've never really been in a relationship so I'm no expert. You're pretty damned critical of anybody who doesn't share your exact mindset. You live an efficient and functional life, except for the fact that you're utterly miserable and downright bitter, clearly due to your overly cloistered lifestyle, yet criticize people who actually are happy because you view the method by which they pursue their happiness as somehow more irrational than being miserable and alone in a clinically sterile lifestyle. You know what's bizarre? A grown man who's afraid to have sex. Not someone taking solace in religion to escape the curse that is sentience; having to contemplate our own mortality. ------------------- Stoop kid's afraid to leave his stoop.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
KR_1250 Custom Title Goes Here. Neolithic total posts: 6280 since: Apr 2006	Mar 29, 12 at 6:54am ^ re: Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship?
	quote AnonymousGuy taking solace in religion to escape the curse that is sentience; having to contemplate our own mortality. LOL, Great quote. "The curse that is sentience" I kinda like that.
	quote quick quote edit quick edit del posts in thread report
[All dates in (PST) time]	Threads List « Next Newest Next Oldest »

Thread title	From	Last replied
Now searching...

Should Religious Beliefs Stand In The Way of A Relationship? - Page 3

Hobbies

Sports

Skills

Chat and Lounges

Game Platforms

Mobile Platforms

Top Core Games

Top Portable Games

Top Communities